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Discussion in 'The Bar' started by Hateman, Nov 4, 2012.
Ever have that happen to you at a party?
What's wrong with you?
You mean like when you have the beer shits from a night of drinking?
Oh, well, fuck yeah, man.
That there is what I call a fuckin' party.
Not at a party, but while driving out in the middle of nowhere. Had to find a gas station and clean myself up. It's how I finally realized that I'm lactose intolerant.
Cocaine does that to you. Happened once.
What is the reverse?
I thought I had to shit the other day and it was just a really, really, really loud FART.
Everyone in the office heard it.
Oh once, yeah. We were at a friend's house for Thanksgiving dinner. Something didn't agree with me, and I spent some time in the bathroom with the wet shits. Later on what I thought was a small fart ended up letting some poop out. Feel me? So I went back up to the bathroom, took my pants and underwear off and proceeded to clean myself up, but I didn't shower or anything. That'd be a bit much.
Later that night I went home with the new girlfriend I'd taken to the party, and it was the first night she went down on me. I worried a little that there was still some shit smell, but she didn't mention it. Oy.
No, the laxatives they cut the cocaine with did that to you.
The more you know!
Why are you farting at a party?
Never happened at a party, but it did happen when driving on the interstate in Texas with more than an hour to go. I grabbed a plastic bag that I had in the car and sat on it. Then I pulled into the nearest gas station, cleaned and changed my pants.
not at a party, but ever since i had my gall bladder removed, if i eat too much fatty or oily foods it's happened. i have to be aware of that possibility all the time.
also remember those potato chips made with that oil you can't digest? does the same thing: the potatoes go in as fried chips and come out as potatoes and pure oil. apparently if you can't digest it, your body purifies it. Removes the potatoes and salt and allows the oil to "escape" all by itself.
not just a shart, an aggressive shart
I've had a splatter or two in my day.
It can be dangerous! Your body tricks your mind.