Howard Eviscerating Alison's Family...
He even gets into how Alison's mother's voice annoys him.
Nary a bad word to say about Beth's family, though. They're all perfect, he says, and they all look stunning.
It's more evidence of how his first marriage was a real marriage, because it was solid enough that he didn't have to bullshit the entire time. It could survive some jokes or harshness. The relationship with the Princess is a total sham, and they both know it.
Notice how Alison had to throw herself her own birthday party, because Howard was too emotionally uninvolved to do it?
Now he's busy making embarrassing video tapes of his brother in law and his wife doing cartwheels. He couldn't be anymore involved.
It's shocking how much a guy could just totally throw away his first family like that, and be sooo far up his second wife's ass. Embarrassing.
Alison Berns Stern Simon, we speak your name.
And I'll bet Mr. Berns never defrauded insurance companies back in the day either.......
Wow, he even talks about his wife's belly hanging over her panties.
He was so emotionally abusive.
And now he gives Sal lectures on what a dick he is...
It'd be ok if he acknowledged that he's a massive dick too, but he doesn't. It's not like he's not still a dick (so I disagree with those who say that he's changed since his first marriage...he hasn't, he's still a selfish borderline-sociopath), it's just that he knows that he can't afford to unleash all of that dickish behavior.
He went from ridiculing Alison's belly fat with real malice and anger in his voice on the air, to whining like the biggest bitch when Sal called Howard's horse a horse.
caring about other people and their happiness is just not something howard does. that's why he could completely turn his back on 3 young girls and a wife, in exchange for a young strumpet he could show off. it just snowballed from there to the amazingness his life is today.
Originally Posted by Famous
Last edited by killallposers; 07-07-2013 at 02:35 PM.
Stern went to a nine inch nails concert with his girlfriend Ralph.
Allison's brother got a massive plug for his travel agency......
Before Beth, Allison was tossed under the bus all the time......leave poor Howard alone....
He even says in one of those clips that "I just want to be cut off from the rest of the world. My kids get in the way of that. It's what I fantasize about..."
Originally Posted by killallposers
So not only is he low-key wishing that his kids were out of his life, but it's funny how he doesn't allow himself to be cut off from the rest of the world, now that he's with Beth. The kids didn't stop him from cutting himself off, but Beth does. He's busying flying out for a star-fucker wedding, for Beth's sake.
I hope that he smartens up before he's old, and has totally lost it. I absolutely believe that Beth will try some shady shit like getting the will rewritten.
His kids definitely have a ton of animosity, and the way he was trying to twist himself into a pretzel to explain why kids grow up to hate their parents (when he was talking to Johnny Fratto recently), was funny.
allison looks good there. sorta tori amos-ish with a butt chin. just noticed that's ellen in the background. only the 2nd adult pic i've seen of her, looked the same in both. not too good.
Originally Posted by Famous
Another one (contains yet another reference to how Howard really can't fuck unless he uses a vibrator on women...add premature ejaculator to his list of wonderful qualities):
This one takes the cake, though. So basically, Alison's parents, out of the goodness of their hearts, decide to come watch the kids so Howard doesn't have to be bothered at all, yet he bitches about them nonstop.
But beff says Howard was a wonderful dad!
Howard dishes out plenty of Ostrosky hate, but in his predictable, passive aggressive manner. It manifests in the Roosevelt bullies, who morphed from black to Polish & his claims that Warsaw "was like Manhattan, Robin", before those evil, anti-Semetic Polacks disposed of the country's intellectually superior Jews. Also, whenever he mocks jocks by characterising them as the personification of dumbness, he's insulting his brothers-in-law.
Originally Posted by Famous
I wouldn't worry too much about it. When both Alison and Howard are on their death beds, who's going to look back as having a good life? Hint: Not Howard.
you're really stretching...although howard changes his stories like i change my lipstick since he met beth he doesn't say a thing about the poles. his worshipful attitude toward the ostrosky's is probably one of the first things i detested about him. this was after his incessant mocking criticism of alison and her family. he'd always complain about having to lock himself in his basement to get away from them. they appeared to be caring people whose main fault was that they asked about work.
Originally Posted by schnauzer
on occasion when he does speak about the ostrosky's, it's always in glowing terms (except for the mother hanging up on beth story). judy is an angel, she's deeply religious and feeds the homeless (did you know she was also a modoe?). howard even imposed on a friend to get a rosary for her that was blessed by the pope (or something to that effect). the boys (beth's brothers) are big, handsome jocks who are great guys (howard says), and did you know beth's father was an oral surgeon? (of course, no mention of bob's medicare fraud. truth is, beth and her family are treated with respect and reverence, alison's were ridiculed.
I miss Alison . . .
Originally Posted by Herc
Robin and Fred let him self destruct...why not tell him what a ahole he is being
Look man, everyone evolves
She raised kids.
Beth raises animoes.
They're a lot the same.
Great post, isabella! The one way he does really express frustration at Beth, is through the voice of Mel Gibson and the like. He doesn't have the balls to ever do it directly.
Remember the one time he did -- when he angrily mused that Beth wouldn't even be invited to these fashion shows if it weren't for him -- he pretended that Chauncey took that quote out of context.
He's afraid to ever say anything directly, because he thinks she holds all of the power in the relationship. Amazing how things change.
This is the most enlightening clip I've heard, as far as problems in Howard's first marriage. It shatters a lot of the bs lies Howard has told through the years:
*Howard always claimed that he and his ex-wife never argued. Here they both state that all they do is argue when Howard gets home.
*Howard always claimed that him airing the details of their personal life, and lusting after girls on air, never contributed to their breakup. Here you can hear real annoyance and anger in Alison's voice over both of those things, and Howard says that this is what they always argue about when they get home.
*I love how he constantly looks for reassurance from Alison that she still loves him. Maybe if you treated her right, you wouldn't have to be so worried about this.
*He actually says "why don't you help an animal shelter. Get a charity." Wow.
*He ponders how loud if Alison is thinking about divorce, and seems to think that she is.
Speaking of Howard's sometime passive aggressive manner, the most passive aggression thing he's always done, IMO, was diminish the work of therapists who aren't medical doctors. That has to be a direct shot at his wife. Why would you downplay the work of something your spouse has chosen as a career? To this day he still does it. He has no respect for her at all. Meanwhile, she's legitimately trained, gotten further licenses and schooling, even after she was married to someone super rich...and made a career of it before Howard had anything.
At the same time, he elevates Beth as if she were some legitimate model (as if that would even be more impressive than the legitimate career that Alison had).
Critical of her appearance: