A Brief History of Howard Stern

Discussion in 'The Howard Stern Show' started by Rob0729, Jan 13, 2015.

  1. Rob0729

    Rob0729 Well-Known Member

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    Last edited: Jan 13, 2015
  2. Rob0729

    Rob0729 Well-Known Member

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    You can tell the writer is a new listener. Thinks Kevin Metheny's nickname was Pig Vommit (only was called that in the movie) and a whole section dedicated to Richard and Sal while Billy West isn't even mentioned. Neither was Alison. Mr. America?!? Maybe Howard already rewrote this history.
     
  3. youknew

    youknew Well-Known Member

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  4. Rob0729

    Rob0729 Well-Known Member

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    Ooops! Didn't see it. Sorry.
     
  5. peterfonda

    peterfonda Well-Known Member

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  6. Rob0729

    Rob0729 Well-Known Member

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    C'mon, in a few years, Howard will spin it that Howard had to let Jackie go because he was holding the show back and he found out the show was much better without him because it allowed Howard's abilities to shine more.
     
  7. LobsterTails

    LobsterTails Well-Known Member

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    "In his second biography, Mr. America"

    The writer is obviously a big fan.
     
  8. OV

    OV Rapscallion

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    "The Cliff Notes History Of Howard Stern"

    • Was an insecure, anti-social nerd from a dysfunctional family with a domineering mother and weak father image

    • Found out in college he had a knack for morning zoo'ing

    • Got married to a regular girl of the same faith who supported him emotionally and financially so he could chase his dream

    • Found that raunch radiated on the radio and allowed him to live an unfamiliar life vicariously. Parlayed that into fame and fortune by pointing out the hypocrisy of others, letting the chips fall where they may

    • Had 3 suburban kids, discovered Prodigy and let his wife raise them while he masturbated downstairs online. Exposed to a lot of titillation in the privacy of his basement including homosexuality which struck a chord.

    • Fame and fortune started going to his head; bonded especially closely with a hairdresser fan from NJ that he was unexplainably sexually attracted to. His wife discovered condoms that were meant to be used with his new stylist, taking every precaution in the midst of an AIDS epidemic

    • Marriage ended, found an empty headed, former escort to Arabian emirates. and millionaires, with a lifelong souvenir of Herpes simplex. Got sold a bill of goods that this ungainly, odd looking, poseur was a real model and then from an ego motivation, invested millions for revisionist history and her career enhancement. To no avail.

    • Chose celebrity acceptance and the appearance of a happy marriage to what he wrongly perceived as a "hot trophy wife" over children and lifelong friends like Dr Lou. Actively undertook campaign to purge all his tapes of political incorrectness and apologized to all the celebrities he correctly skewered

    • Was never really the "King of All Media," but has solidified the permanent damage to his legacy as the "King of All Hypocrisy" and "Sultan of All Sell-outs"
     
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