Age is a dirty mistress.

Discussion in 'The Bar' started by Slippy, Aug 1, 2016.

  1. Slippy

    Slippy Well-Known Member VIP

    Reputations:
    3,909
    Joined:
    Nov 19, 2010
    Messages:
    34,899
    Likes Received:
    3,947
    In this thread, we bitch about the inevitable woes of the cunt known as "age".

    Allow me to start:

    tennis elbow

    I've never played a game of fucking tennis in my whole stupid mother-fucking life. wtf
     
    Nikkerz, crash83, MemphisMan and 6 others like this.
  2. Slippy

    Slippy Well-Known Member VIP

    Reputations:
    3,909
    Joined:
    Nov 19, 2010
    Messages:
    34,899
    Likes Received:
    3,947
    Both elbows. I can no longer pick up a pot, a pan...........a BEER.....without wincing or dropping. I refer to it as "foositis".

    PS: Got a new foosball table! :dance:
     
    crash83, IfTheyOnlyKnew and babybear like this.
  3. RH Goatcabin

    RH Goatcabin One Man Four Banner Mafia 2010 OG POTY The Bar VIP Gold

    Reputations:
    43,923
    Joined:
    Oct 25, 2010
    Messages:
    114,689
    Likes Received:
    43,376
    Gumdrop! Time to thrust! :madsex:
     
    IfTheyOnlyKnew likes this.
  4. HelloCleveland!

    HelloCleveland! Well-Known Member VIP

    Reputations:
    37,664
    Joined:
    Jan 5, 2012
    Messages:
    7,133
    Likes Received:
    9,800
    My back. There are times when it tightens up and I can barely get up off the couch or out of bed.

    I know, I know, read Dr Sarno's book, it's all in my head :rolleyes:
     
  5. Slippy

    Slippy Well-Known Member VIP

    Reputations:
    3,909
    Joined:
    Nov 19, 2010
    Messages:
    34,899
    Likes Received:
    3,947
    Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh the back. It's one of the first things to go. :sad:

    You will have to take the lead, sexypants. I cannot hold myself up right now. :hump:

    Here's another theory: If my dog put her back out, or her leg joints, or her hips - I'd have the humanity and decency to help her out with pain pills for a bit, and then humanely put her down.

    WHY CAN'T WE PUT OURSELVES DOWN????? OR OUR FAMILY MEMBERS WHO CAN NO LONGER WIPE THEIR OWN ASSES??????

    fucking stupidity
     
    redshirt and babybear like this.
  6. JameGumb

    JameGumb We're all out of toner! VIP

    Reputations:
    77,048
    Joined:
    Dec 29, 2013
    Messages:
    60,287
    Likes Received:
    46,095
    Oh
     
  7. FOXXXONE

    FOXXXONE Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    6,964
    Joined:
    Nov 5, 2010
    Messages:
    9,115
    Likes Received:
    5,054
    Yerp.... Fuck aging
     
  8. JameGumb

    JameGumb We're all out of toner! VIP

    Reputations:
    77,048
    Joined:
    Dec 29, 2013
    Messages:
    60,287
    Likes Received:
    46,095
    Ok
     
  9. Slippy

    Slippy Well-Known Member VIP

    Reputations:
    3,909
    Joined:
    Nov 19, 2010
    Messages:
    34,899
    Likes Received:
    3,947
    Clearly one of the board intellects.........
     
    Droog likes this.
  10. Dream Theater

    Dream Theater DAWGS E-BULLY Squad 2010 OG Gold

    Reputations:
    142,316
    Joined:
    Sep 17, 2010
    Messages:
    33,236
    Likes Received:
    59,210
    My fucking inner elbow is killing me too... I looked that shit up and I think what I have is called golfers elbow.. I do not participate in that faggotry.. Chasing a ball around and paying a fortune to do it.
     
  11. JameGumb

    JameGumb We're all out of toner! VIP

    Reputations:
    77,048
    Joined:
    Dec 29, 2013
    Messages:
    60,287
    Likes Received:
    46,095
    Why are you attacking me?
     
    stanggirl likes this.
  12. Slippy

    Slippy Well-Known Member VIP

    Reputations:
    3,909
    Joined:
    Nov 19, 2010
    Messages:
    34,899
    Likes Received:
    3,947
  13. Slippy

    Slippy Well-Known Member VIP

    Reputations:
    3,909
    Joined:
    Nov 19, 2010
    Messages:
    34,899
    Likes Received:
    3,947
    Golf is gay.

    Played 18 holes last weekend.

    Sucked as bad as usual, hurt like a bitch afterwards - but I got a cute outfit to do it in. :yes:
     
    RenchFries, O Face and Tigger Please like this.
  14. Bro

    Bro There is no Dana VIP Gold

    Reputations:
    133,031
    Joined:
    Sep 26, 2010
    Messages:
    104,647
    Likes Received:
    28,888
    Tennis elbow or not, I'd still throw you a bang.
     
    wigtropolis likes this.
  15. wigtropolis

    wigtropolis Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    10,806
    Joined:
    Nov 5, 2012
    Messages:
    22,426
    Likes Received:
    13,617
    jerking takes a toll
     
  16. Dream Theater

    Dream Theater DAWGS E-BULLY Squad 2010 OG Gold

    Reputations:
    142,316
    Joined:
    Sep 17, 2010
    Messages:
    33,236
    Likes Received:
    59,210
    I'd follow you around the course to watch you bending over to place and pick up balls. :jerk:
     
    crazypreacher likes this.
  17. Gwarn1

    Gwarn1 Single VIP

    Reputations:
    42,423
    Joined:
    Dec 18, 2011
    Messages:
    76,858
    Likes Received:
    27,575
    I hurt my back wiping my ass last week
     
    IfTheyOnlyKnew likes this.
  18. crazypreacher

    crazypreacher Not followin whitey's rules

    Reputations:
    29,237
    Joined:
    Sep 1, 2010
    Messages:
    50,930
    Likes Received:
    53,407
    I'd still smooch you where you poop.
     
    Dream Theater likes this.
  19. Slippy

    Slippy Well-Known Member VIP

    Reputations:
    3,909
    Joined:
    Nov 19, 2010
    Messages:
    34,899
    Likes Received:
    3,947
    I'd worry about my hips.
    I'd worry about your hips.

    So true. I've got to learn how to masturbate with my feet. :down:
     
    Bro likes this.
  20. Slippy

    Slippy Well-Known Member VIP

    Reputations:
    3,909
    Joined:
    Nov 19, 2010
    Messages:
    34,899
    Likes Received:
    3,947
    Did she appreciate it though?