Politics An Oregon Miltia Idiot Throws a Tantrum Because People Are Sending Bags of Dicks

Discussion in 'The Howard Stern Show' started by XuXu, Jan 12, 2016.

  1. XuXu

    XuXu VIP Extreme Gold

    Reputations:
    785,102
    Joined:
    Jan 15, 2012
    Messages:
    20,818
    Likes Received:
    15,960
    http://thedailybanter.com/2016/01/poor-poor-patriots/


    Even if you don’t immediately recognize the name Jon Ritzheimer, you almost certainly know his distinctive face by now. In terms of who the biggest laughingstock is among the entirely laughable Vanilla ISIS clowns still holding an empty bird sanctuary hostage, Ritzheimer probably sits comfortably atop the pile. Even Ryan Bundy, who bears more than a passing resemblance to Alex Karras’s Mongo character from Blazing Saddles, isn’t as eminently mockable as the man who provided us with the most meme-worthy moment of this whole shit-show so far.

    Ritzheimer, you might remember, is the tough guy militiaman who at the start of the standoff parked his nice pick-up truck off a public road, set up his iPhone and recorded a videoclip that he then uploaded to the internet — which was created by the federal government — where he complains about how government tyranny has made his life unlivable. His performance, which included speaking directly to his daughters about why he wouldn’t be home for New Year’s — because “daddy swore an oath” — was so dripping with tearful melodrama that it instantly inspired a legion of online smart-alecs to do their own versions of what became known as his sad, patriotic farewell.

    Now, apparently not content to let the nationwide ridicule die down a bit, Ritzheimer is back with the sequel to “goodbye cruel world.” See, Jon Ritzheimer is mad right now. Not just about how our hallowed Constitution is being trampled on — although he’s still plenty mad about that — but about how all of us not currently freezing our asses off in Middle of Nowhere, Oregon aren’t taking him and his fellow patriots seriously. Specifically, the problem as Ritzheimer sees it is this: a week ago he and the Bundy Militia put out a call for backup in the form of supplies they somehow forgot to bring with them, this despite the fact that Ammon Bundy said they planned to occupy the Malheur National Wildlife Refuge for years. Among the supplies they asked for — snacks.
     
  2. Sloppyjoe

    Sloppyjoe VIP Extreme Gold

    Reputations:
    99,051
    Joined:
    Oct 30, 2015
    Messages:
    7,418
    Likes Received:
    16,487
    You dick!
     
  3. XuXu

    XuXu VIP Extreme Gold

    Reputations:
    785,102
    Joined:
    Jan 15, 2012
    Messages:
    20,818
    Likes Received:
    15,960
    “So we went and picked up some mail that came in from, you know, a lot of the supporters. But along with that mail we got an abundance of the hate mail and it was just, it was really mind-blowing to me that people would actually spend their money — you know, this box right here, 17-dollars and 90-cents. They spend and waste their money on all this hateful stuff to send out here to us and buy this ridiculous stuff. It’s really ridiculous, even the — this one was really funny, a bag of dicks. So rather than going out and doing good, you know, they just spend all their money on hate, and hate, and hate, and hate. So we’re gonna clear the table and we’re gonna continue to do work and do good for our country. We’re not gonna be deterred. We’re not gonna let all your junk and hate-mail sidetrack us and we’re gonna continue to do what’s right for our country. For the rest of you patriots out there that are still twiddling your thumbs debating whether or not you should come out, well, now’s the time. If you wanna be part of history in the making, you need to get out here and you need to show some support. Now I’m not talking about coming out here and being an ‘outside perimeter.’ Come here and be a patriot. Come here and stand up for your country. Do what’s right. Enough talk, now it’s time for action. I hope to see you.”
     
    Ving likes this.
  4. XuXu

    XuXu VIP Extreme Gold

    Reputations:
    785,102
    Joined:
    Jan 15, 2012
    Messages:
    20,818
    Likes Received:
    15,960
  5. FrstTimeLngTme

    FrstTimeLngTme Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    17,176
    Joined:
    Jan 12, 2014
    Messages:
    1,245
    Likes Received:
    3,534
    Poor (dumb) dopes
     
  6. chrisfromvegas

    chrisfromvegas HOOLIGAN VIP

    Reputations:
    115,558
    Joined:
    Aug 24, 2010
    Messages:
    5,572
    Likes Received:
    6,948
    Meanwhile he squirreled a few away in his pocket.
     
    Gusbuss and XuXu like this.
  7. HowieStearn

    HowieStearn HateClub

    Reputations:
    80,080
    Joined:
    Dec 13, 2011
    Messages:
    14,490
    Likes Received:
    14,263
  8. XuXu

    XuXu VIP Extreme Gold

    Reputations:
    785,102
    Joined:
    Jan 15, 2012
    Messages:
    20,818
    Likes Received:
    15,960
  9. XuXu

    XuXu VIP Extreme Gold

    Reputations:
    785,102
    Joined:
    Jan 15, 2012
    Messages:
    20,818
    Likes Received:
    15,960
  10. chrisfromvegas

    chrisfromvegas HOOLIGAN VIP

    Reputations:
    115,558
    Joined:
    Aug 24, 2010
    Messages:
    5,572
    Likes Received:
    6,948
    Funnt, I don't remember voting for any of these guys to represent my intrests.
     
    HorseFanNetwork, Gusbuss and XuXu like this.
  11. Capn Crud

    Capn Crud The Pride of Cucamonga VIP Gold

    Reputations:
    91,930
    Joined:
    Dec 13, 2011
    Messages:
    63,452
    Likes Received:
    8,322
    Fuck these Y'all Queda assholes. They need to be dealt with like any other rogue cell.
     
    Gusbuss, chrisfromvegas and XuXu like this.
  12. XuXu

    XuXu VIP Extreme Gold

    Reputations:
    785,102
    Joined:
    Jan 15, 2012
    Messages:
    20,818
    Likes Received:
    15,960
    the guy is crazy and funny in that last youtube vid I posted
     
    chrisfromvegas likes this.
  13. Logan

    Logan Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    7,842
    Joined:
    Jan 31, 2014
    Messages:
    675
    Likes Received:
    1,861
    You'd think that he woud be self aware enough to come to the conclusion that " maybe I'm on the wrong side of this argument" after most of the country started making fun of him....
     
  14. dawg

    dawg In The Dog House Staff Member

    Reputations:
    540,047
    Joined:
    Aug 19, 2010
    Messages:
    119,425
    Likes Received:
    90,636
    Oregon judge plans to bill Ammon Bundy up to $70,000 a day for security costs to county

    An Oregon judge says he will bill Ammon Bundy up to $70,000 a day to reimburse Harney County for security costs related to the ongoing occupation of a wildlife refuge.
    Local schools reopened Monday for the first time since Bundy and other militants seized a visitors center Jan. 2 at the Malheur National Wildlife Preserve and demanded the transfer of federally owned land to the county, reported KTVZ-TV.

    Bundy and other militants used a backhoe owned by the U.S. Department of Fish and Wildlife to remove fences separating federal land from property owned by a local rancher.
     
  15. HorseFanNetwork

    HorseFanNetwork Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    24,104
    Joined:
    Jan 15, 2012
    Messages:
    2,050
    Likes Received:
    3,477
  16. tv910

    tv910 Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    71,124
    Joined:
    Dec 14, 2011
    Messages:
    9,618
    Likes Received:
    17,975
    What's his address? There's a farm down the road, maybe I'll send him a box of cow manure.
     
    XuXu likes this.
  17. Logan

    Logan Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    7,842
    Joined:
    Jan 31, 2014
    Messages:
    675
    Likes Received:
    1,861
    I love this whole "take the land back..." bullshit.

    I wonder if they realised that when they drove up the interstate to Oregon that the land that the interstate is on used to be other people's land before the government bought the land so they could make the highways.

    Are they going to take a jackhammer to the highways next to "give that land back" as well?

    I'm so entertained by dumb people...
     
  18. XuXu

    XuXu VIP Extreme Gold

    Reputations:
    785,102
    Joined:
    Jan 15, 2012
    Messages:
    20,818
    Likes Received:
    15,960
    This is their website.

    http://oregonmilitiaalliance.webs.com/

    I love the last part:

    National Alert level




    MDS Alert level: Orange [​IMG]

    Due to the increaseing terrorist and political tensions overseas, all Militia units should move to Orange Alert Status.

    Small Unit Leaders prepare to assist. Be ready to move on 2 hour notice. If possible, be prepared to pre-evacuate immediate family members and their personal gear. Maintain close contact with your immediate chain of command and team members.

    Eyes and ears only at this point! if you see something out of the ordinary, contact your local Sheriffs office!
     
  19. XuXu

    XuXu VIP Extreme Gold

    Reputations:
    785,102
    Joined:
    Jan 15, 2012
    Messages:
    20,818
    Likes Received:
    15,960
  20. stash

    stash 2017 Kimbra of All Media VIP

    Reputations:
    95,627
    Joined:
    Apr 15, 2014
    Messages:
    6,197
    Likes Received:
    16,120
    could a gay pull this off? :fil: