Anyone here give the Best Man toast at a wedding?

Discussion in 'The Howard Stern Show' started by sonicaudio, Oct 18, 2015.

  1. sonicaudio

    sonicaudio Active Member

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    I am the best man at a wedding in a couple of weeks and supposedly 300 guests are attending. I really didn't want to write a speech ... thought it would sound better if it was impromptu.

    Problem is I am usually quiet and a man of few words. Any advice, tips, etc??? Xanax will be my friend that night

    :dropjaw:
     
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  2. Bristol Chicken

    Bristol Chicken Free Range and Loving It

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    I winged it at a very large and expensive wedding. Didn't make an ass of myself or anyone at the wedding but could have done a much better job.
    Prepare something. You can always go off script.
     
    Last edited: Oct 18, 2015
  3. Calloused Shins

    Calloused Shins Well-Known Member

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    3 times. Trust me. Write it down... For the right price I'll whip you up something memorable. You will fail miserably if you wing it. Oh. And make sure you finish on a bridesmaids face, it's good luck
     
  4. DiamondGoddess

    DiamondGoddess Born Ready for My Close-Up! DawgShed News Gold

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    I was the cake cutter once.

    I'm here if you need advice on getting the slices nice and symmetrical!!!

    :c

    Best of luck; prepare and you'll do fine.
     
  5. Howchilla

    Howchilla VIP Extreme Gold

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    Don't wing it. I gave the toast at my brother's wedding. Probably 200 people. I have no problem talking in front of people and I had a few bullet points I wanted to hit.

    Few rules to follow:
    1) Don't rip on the bride
    2) Don't be crude. Odds are the Pastor or Priest will be there at the reception
    3) Tell fun/embarrassing story. Not too embarrassing where the groom will be mortified to have the general public knowing.
    4) Don't go on too long.
    5) Speak from the heart

    Definitely do not wing it. You'll be nervous and your mind will wander and you'll go places you don't intend to do. Oh, save the boozing until after you are done w/ your speech.
     
  6. Slow

    Slow All The Pieces Matter DawgShed News

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    Write one joke. Say something sincere about the two. End it in less than 60 seconds. You are keeping people from the bar and the longer the speech the worse it will be remembered
     
  7. maroon

    maroon Well-Known Member Banned User

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    i'm sure theres great examples on youtube
     
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  8. sonicaudio

    sonicaudio Active Member

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    wow ... maybe I will prepare something. Didn't think there would be so many "write it down" suggestions.
     
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  9. Jayla

    Jayla Ou ai-je l'esprit? Gold

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    Just write it out and read it straight from then paper. Nothing wrong with that. If you're a quiet man of few words, I don't get why you think an impromptu speech would be better.
     
  10. dancearmstrong

    dancearmstrong Well-Known Member

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    I agree with all of this. Most importantly keep it short and sweet. Nobody wants to hear some guy going on for 5 minutes.

    Introduce yourself, maybe a quick story of you and the groom (a clean one), compliment the bride (her beauty, kindness, intelligence, how she made the groom a better man etc.) Wish the couple good luck, thank everyone for coming and wrap it up.
     
  11. Howchilla

    Howchilla VIP Extreme Gold

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    Instead of writing it out and trying to memorize something just put a couple of notes on a index card.
    Here is something simple you can do:
    -Nice welcoming, Talk about how long you have known the groom. Say how you have never seen him so happy as he is now. Tell a fun story from your youth. Talk about the time you have spent w/ the bride and how she is wonderful and you can tell that your friend/relative are perfect for each other. Wish them a lifelong of happiness. Exit stage left.
     
  12. Mlaw

    Mlaw Quite Contrarian Gold

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    Very good advice, you'll probably have a few drinks in you, so you don't want to wing it----

    I've done readings, speeches, sang at a lot of weddings, what's help me find words are reading quotes and excerpts of others for inspiration

    http://www.goodreads.com/quotes/tag/marriage

    http://parade.com/391231/lindsaylowe/100-inspiring-quotes-on-love-and-marriage/
     
  13. sonicaudio

    sonicaudio Active Member

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    extremely helpful posts so far, I like the index card/bullet point approach. Me thinks just getting some important points out of my head and on paper will do wonders
     
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  14. Time Bandit

    Time Bandit Well-Known Member

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    I was a best man and didn't even think to call for a toast...the day of the wedding I remember thinking "oh shit I should have had a bachelor party"..
    I go to pick up my tux, the clerk says this much $$ I say that's too much she says yea a groomsman picked up their tux and said you'd pay for it. I say fuck you are you going to hold my tux hostage, I'll tell you were the weddings at you can go get the tux or the money from him..I finally said fuck it and paid for them both cause there wasn't enuf time. I still hate that cheap lying sack. He was always a broke fuck plus he was missing a leg so I just cussed him out.
     
  15. Shamrock12

    Shamrock12 Bouncy... Bouncy...

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    I've heard HUNDREDS of wedding speeches (used to manage at a wedding facility)

    The best were always brief, had a laugh and personal. A short story about the groom, a short story about how u knew he was meant for her, a chuckle for the old people (ask him to put a hand over her hand, and say its the last time he will have the upper hand, or some shit like that). No more than 5 minutes IMO
     
  16. Fillmore Fingers

    Fillmore Fingers Sandy Vag Banned User

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    Keeping it brief cannot be stressed enough. People hate having to sit through any of the speeches to begin with, so do them all a favor and restrict yourself to the length of a Ramones song. 2:22 and OUT.

    I did an impromptu speech at my best friend's wedding and owned the room; 500 people strong. The wedding planner told me not to, because I wasn't in the plans, but I told her to go fuck herself because I had traveled 2,000 miles to get to the wedding to begin with. His brother got up and did a rambling speech for more than 10 minutes and put the room to sleep.
     
  17. IfTheyOnlyKnew

    IfTheyOnlyKnew VIP Extreme Gold

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    This might be an option. ;)
     
  18. larryluncg

    larryluncg Empty VIP

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    Cool story bro
     
  19. Shamrock12

    Shamrock12 Bouncy... Bouncy...

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    the time thing is huge... 1. you are making old people stand to listen. 2. 50% of the people dont really give a fuck about your life story 3. people just want to take a piss/get another drink/eat . 4. you arent the only one talking... usually its at least another person.... keep it short and simple so everyone will actually listen to it all and possibly enjoy it
     
  20. LaserT

    LaserT You have to have fun.

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    You'll do fine. I've had to do it too. Listen everyone is drinking and happy and wrapped up in the couple and the nice words you are saying, so there's no pressure in that sense. Everyone is just there for fun and support. A work speech or high school speech, etc, may be totally different and pressure. I'll agree to that ha. I'm sure you'll do fine Sonic. Relax and enjoy. You'll feel great after you do it. :)
     
    Last edited: Oct 18, 2015