Artie lange is the best at quick-witted one liners

Discussion in 'The Howard Stern Show' started by knu3421, Feb 17, 2012.

  1. knu3421

    knu3421 Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    -3
    Joined:
    Jan 15, 2012
    Messages:
    22,800
    Likes Received:
    5,996
    i mean i viewed the you tube clips of artie's roast he may be the quickest ever at one liner funnies. you'll have to agree.
     
  2. smichal

    smichal A1 Dick Game

    Reputations:
    -3
    Joined:
    Jan 15, 2012
    Messages:
    13,494
    Likes Received:
    21,812
    I miss artie
     
  3. knu3421

    knu3421 Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    -3
    Joined:
    Jan 15, 2012
    Messages:
    22,800
    Likes Received:
    5,996
    he is pretty quick for a fat guy
     
  4. Chimney Portions

    Chimney Portions I drink cum Banned User

    Reputations:
    0
    Joined:
    Dec 13, 2011
    Messages:
    30,051
    Likes Received:
    2,251
    I like when he says "jpeg me at artielange@myface/twitbook.orgnet." It gets funnier and funnier every time he says it...especially when he says it twice during the same show.

    And the "Filatto gelato" gag never stopped being funny during the four consecutive days he repeated it. I just hope he plays the "Boston State of Mind" song another six or twelve times.

    And then there's the John Candy monologue and the Bobby Valentine-wrap audio that he needs to play a few more times. Why bother thinking of new funny things to say when you can just keep repeating the old stuff? Right?
     
  5. RH Goatcabin

    RH Goatcabin Time to pulsate. Time to yearn. 2010 OG POTY The Bar Gold

    Reputations:
    56,817
    Joined:
    Oct 25, 2010
    Messages:
    118,626
    Likes Received:
    46,049
    Artie put knives in his tummy because he was sad...
     
  6. knu3421

    knu3421 Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    -3
    Joined:
    Jan 15, 2012
    Messages:
    22,800
    Likes Received:
    5,996
    that's bullshit he wanted rest he wanted out of the stern show. true story.
     
  7. Ruffypup

    Ruffypup Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    3
    Joined:
    Dec 13, 2011
    Messages:
    23,242
    Likes Received:
    3,483
    He's quick with a joke that will light up your smoke but there's someplace that he'd rather be.
     
  8. Chimney Portions

    Chimney Portions I drink cum Banned User

    Reputations:
    0
    Joined:
    Dec 13, 2011
    Messages:
    30,051
    Likes Received:
    2,251
    He told Joy Beyhar that he just wanted to sleep and that he thought he'd fall asleep if he bled a lot. He also told Letterman that he was addicted to "pills."
     
  9. Chimney Portions

    Chimney Portions I drink cum Banned User

    Reputations:
    0
    Joined:
    Dec 13, 2011
    Messages:
    30,051
    Likes Received:
    2,251
    Artie loves pancakes, but not interracial dating.

    Even a broken clock is right twice a day....unless it's digital and reads "EGG9GG"
     
  10. knu3421

    knu3421 Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    -3
    Joined:
    Jan 15, 2012
    Messages:
    22,800
    Likes Received:
    5,996
    it will end badly is what a recall from artie's mouth suring the show. and it did.
     
  11. Time Bandit

    Time Bandit Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    0
    Joined:
    Jan 31, 2012
    Messages:
    10,037
    Likes Received:
    8,417
    his.. as you say "quick witted one liners" are a grotesque bigoted foulmouthed degenerate's 'thoughts'..just 'verbalized'.. where as most decent humans censor themselves before they speak
     
  12. EmperorsNewCaps

    EmperorsNewCaps Member

    Reputations:
    31
    Joined:
    Jan 15, 2012
    Messages:
    12,184
    Likes Received:
    15,795
    Like most of us, he learned by example from the King himself.

    By the way, have you heard Ben Stern likes grapes from chile?
     
  13. Chimney Portions

    Chimney Portions I drink cum Banned User

    Reputations:
    0
    Joined:
    Dec 13, 2011
    Messages:
    30,051
    Likes Received:
    2,251
    [​IMG]
     
  14. Avery

    Avery Well-Known Member Banned User

    Reputations:
    -438
    Joined:
    Oct 22, 2010
    Messages:
    44,510
    Likes Received:
    24,211
    Isn't there a Kristen Wiig movie you should be watching while you bleed out of your vagina and eat ice cream?
     
  15. Chimney Portions

    Chimney Portions I drink cum Banned User

    Reputations:
    0
    Joined:
    Dec 13, 2011
    Messages:
    30,051
    Likes Received:
    2,251
    The difference is that we came to love Artie because, for over 7 years, he was an unpredictable fireball. I can't count how many unexpected and new "bits" came off the cuff. Now he's just recycling the same shit he has been recycling for the last three years of his Stern Show career. On top of that, he'll scream out puns like mantras and has a 95% predictability rate.

    I LOVED Artie and I spent the last several months promoting him and defending him. But now he's become such a predictable hack that it pains me to get through a full N&A show.

    At this point, Artie's as good as his stand up. If you listen for the first time, it ain't bad. After that.....hooooboy.
     
  16. whatsit

    whatsit Dawg Lover VIP

    Reputations:
    17,904
    Joined:
    Aug 22, 2011
    Messages:
    53,751
    Likes Received:
    9,428
    Really wow, that's harsh. I don't listen to N&A that often but I've love Artie on there when I did.
     
  17. Senator Rick

    Senator Rick Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    3
    Joined:
    Jan 15, 2012
    Messages:
    17,259
    Likes Received:
    21,346
    I disagree... many of his more regrettable comments were due to an overabundance of toxicity and oxygen in his system.
     
  18. PTRacing

    PTRacing Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    1,065
    Joined:
    Jan 16, 2012
    Messages:
    1,064
    Likes Received:
    1,216
    Ha ha....I really miss Artie but I don't think anyone misses him more than The Howard Stern Show.
     
  19. Ruffypup

    Ruffypup Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    3
    Joined:
    Dec 13, 2011
    Messages:
    23,242
    Likes Received:
    3,483
    I think Artie is at his best when he is challenged,,, take the Joe Buck interview, his outrageousness was not the funny part, but what is funny is when he is confronted and the one line zingers of retaliation begin to spew out his mouth.....Nobody does THAT better than Artie.
     
  20. Goods

    Goods Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    15
    Joined:
    Jan 15, 2012
    Messages:
    3,528
    Likes Received:
    1,706
    Have you ever slept with an African American gentleman?