Benji Bronk: "I was born with an extraordinary face."

Discussion in 'The Howard Stern Show' started by GivRodnyachance, Jul 23, 2014.

  1. GivRodnyachance

    GivRodnyachance Overt Racist Banned User

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    I believe this is word for word what
    he said just before Elisa called in. If you didn't hear the show, I recommend you listen to see what a cunt he is. He is now the staff member I hate the most, but I digress.

    Huge swollen head. About 3 heads tall.
    Short
    No muscle tone
    No jaw
    Fat body
    Massive amounts of fat under chin
    Eyes that are too big.
    Pale
    Blotchy skin
    Huge forehead
    Almost completely bald and all gray
    Chicklet teeth
    Nose too small for his face
    Deformed ears
    Almost no eyebrows
    Hooding of eyelids
    Large chin
    Lower face is too big
    Eyes too close together
    Gray dull complexion
    Face is too wide

    If he is so happy with his appearance, why did he grow a huge beard that covered most of his face, was wearing mascara, concealer with glitter and blush, a huge wig that covered the sides of his huge face, a large hat that covered his balding, forehead and shadows his face, wore large high heals to disguise his short stature and huge head, and dyed his gray beard dark black?
     

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  2. 00steven

    00steven Well-Known Member

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    He just needs to die
     
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  3. Joe Bauers

    Joe Bauers Well-Known Member

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    The show needs to die. :coffee:
     
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  4. SomerSky

    SomerSky Obsessed with what I hate Banned User

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    Come on! Who in their right mind wouldn't want this??? And where does one buy those "Herman monster" shoes....even on vacation.....he must be destroyed.....
    [​IMG]
     
  5. guruhugz

    guruhugz Well-Known Member

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    benjy is to comedy what elisa is to music
     
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  6. deadbeat

    deadbeat Well-Known Member

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  7. Jayla

    Jayla Ou ai-je l'esprit? Gold

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    Wow. You've really given this some thought. Benjy is hardly my favorite person, and the body is gross, but he's not a BAD looking guy.
     
  8. Pickle Jar

    Pickle Jar Well-Known Member

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    She looks like a cast member of Rocky Horror Show and her knees need to be repaired.
     
  9. Wesmantooth

    Wesmantooth VIP Extreme Gold

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    fat sweaty unfunny fuck it is
     
  10. Dreamking

    Dreamking The dogs of doom are howlin' low...

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    Benjy says shit to get a rise out of people. That is his idea of comedy.

    Saying shit to shock people is the oldest comedy trick in the book. It requires no wit or intelligence.

    Benjy better be praying to a higher power that Howard never goes off the air. THSS is his last job.
     
  11. EvolvedMarbles

    EvolvedMarbles Well-Known Member

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    I picture Benjy buying 3 pairs of the same shoes, hacksawing the soles off 2 of them, and clamping/gluing them to make those things.
     
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  12. ShutupMoron

    ShutupMoron Unknown Member VIP

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    I'd hate to see a pic of someone you consider bad looking. :eek:

    [​IMG]
     
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  13. Jayla

    Jayla Ou ai-je l'esprit? Gold

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    LOL Fair enough. I did say the BODY is gross. But the OP really dissected Benjy's looks in a way I don't totally agree with. His face is OKAY.
     
  14. ShutupMoron

    ShutupMoron Unknown Member VIP

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    I've asked GF's what guys they considered good looking and was always surprised. I guess I'm genetically grossed out by what men in general look like. I look at Benjy and can't get past the I want to :puke: part.
     
  15. cah155

    cah155 Well-Known Member

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    Ugh benjy is the furthest thing from funny or fun.
     
  16. NotMyBro

    NotMyBro VIP Extreme Gold

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    Best part is when Howard said that Elisa's so hot she could be in Playboy. Really Howard? Don't know she was in Playboy? :haha:
     
  17. Rob0729

    Rob0729 Well-Known Member

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    If Benjy was thin, I guess he would be a decent looking guy I guess. But he is an obese bald hobbit.
     
  18. whatsit

    whatsit Dawg Lover VIP

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    no wiki bio on Benji?
     
  19. yaddc

    yaddc Well-Known Member

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    Bring back Jokeman at least he was funny.
     
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  20. SouthernListen

    SouthernListen New phone who dis? VIP

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    The guys here just started feeling 100% better about themselves.
     
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