beth's texts

Discussion in 'The Howard Stern Show' started by ScottBaiosPenis, Oct 9, 2013.

  1. ScottBaiosPenis

    ScottBaiosPenis Well-Known Member

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    what do you think beths texts are that shes hiding from howard...

    [​IMG]

    fake text maker:http://ifaketext.com/
     
  2. Anfkid

    Anfkid Blue Banner Mafia Staff Member

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    yea i have no doubt howard smells like pee lavender and denture cream at this point.
     
  3. Nick Beef

    Nick Beef New Member Banned User

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    She's probably talking to her lawyers and moving some of Howard's money around.
     
  4. reno

    reno VIP Extreme Gold

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    She's probably bitching to her girlfriends about how fucked up it is living with Howard. He's a control freak with OCD. It can't be pleasant.
     
  5. markluke

    markluke Well-Known Member

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    Who would these supposed "girlfriends" be? You mean co-conspirators like Katie Lee?
     
  6. BethSucks

    BethSucks Well-Known Member Staff Member

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    Allegedly

    Beth: Almost out the door, the Mexicans are watching the animoes and ATM is in bed with his iPad

    Katie Lee: Cool, see you soon

    Beth: I'll bring the blow and the booze, you bring the boys, my three favorite b's

    Katie Lee: Will do, Thursday nights are my favorite and make it five b's I'm bring Biff and Barack

    Beth: Yay!, Barack, ATM would be so jealous of his big, bwack cock
     
  7. LaserT

    LaserT You have to have fun. Gold

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    The gold digging party crowd that Beth ran with. The crowd Sandra Bernhardt warned Howard about on his show.
     
  8. knu3421

    knu3421 Well-Known Member

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    Male friend: is he gone yet?

    Beth: yes

    Male friend: let's play catch with one of his wigs when i get there

    Beth: okay xoxo
     
  9. markluke

    markluke Well-Known Member

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  10. LaserT

    LaserT You have to have fun. Gold

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    Friend: Read the article Beth. You fell in love with him at first sight and knew in an instant you were going to spend my life with Howard Stern and you never wore lingerie until Howard! HAHAHAHA!

    Beth: What was I going to say? I know I felt dirty even saying it. Hahaha!

    Friend: HAHAHAHAHAHAHA....... at first sight and he was the man of your life. HAHAHAHAHA!!!

    Beth: HAHAHAHAHA!

    Friend: HAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHA!!!
     
  11. synch22

    synch22 Well-Known Member

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    Lol great job guys I laughed
     
  12. j shmuck

    j shmuck Well-Known Member

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    Everyone likes to yuk it up with friends over some of the quirks of their significant others.

    One can only imagine the material Howard provides her
     
  13. markluke

    markluke Well-Known Member

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  14. markluke

    markluke Well-Known Member

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  15. j shmuck

    j shmuck Well-Known Member

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    Katie: Hey Beth, coming out tonight.

    Beth: No, I think instead I'm going to stay home with my husbend and share a portion of pecans..... HA HA HAHA

    Katie: Holy shit that's rich. Well I know two things that are rich...Both of us!

    Beth: Damn straight girl!

    Katie: speaking of which, I got rid of the bloated drunken midget a few years ago, when will you be able to finally ditch the wicked witch of the upper west side?

    Beth: Don't think I haven't been trying. First I stopped giving him blowjobs. Then I cut out dirty talk. Then I cut down sex to once a month. Then I spend nearly everynight in the Hamptons, and guess what

    Katie: What?

    Beth: This fucking faggot goes and cries about it to his shrink, who then convinces him that this is all part of a healthy relationship.

    Katie: OMG. Now what

    Beth: Well plan B was to alienate the family. We all know that his two oeder girls are uptight hippy feminsts, you know the type who are jealous of us beatiful people, so bit by bit I nudges those two out of the picture.

    Katie: Good move. I tried the same but then Billie's daughter tried to kill herself so I felt a bit guilty.

    Beth: Well, Howard's girls moved to the opposite side of the planet, but then Howard's goes whining to his shrink who convinces him that giving his girls distance and space to become their own people was healthy.

    Katie: Jeesus. We always joked about how you kept his balls in a purse but this is rediculous. What now.

    Beth: Well I started taking pictures with all the hot guys I flirt with, figuring he wold get jealous, and it still doesn't work. Then I filled his house of with kittens and no dice.

    Katie: On the plus side, you got him to buy you a florida mansion, now at least we can hang out on the opposite side of the country

    Beth: You mean my half the divorce settlement

    Katie: Ha Ha Ha, you go girl
     
  16. TallTyrion

    TallTyrion Triggered like a mofo VIP

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  17. ScottBaiosPenis

    ScottBaiosPenis Well-Known Member

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  18. Zyro

    Zyro Well-Known Member

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  19. markluke

    markluke Well-Known Member

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  20. fuzzynuts

    fuzzynuts 99% Relevant

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