News Body Found at Apple HQ!!!

Discussion in 'The Howard Stern Show' started by DiamondGoddess, Apr 27, 2016.

  1. DiamondGoddess

    DiamondGoddess Born Ready for My Close-Up! Gold

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    A body was found this morning on the campus of Apple's headquarters.

    Santa Clara County Sheriff's deputies are on the campus in Cupertino, CA. Law enforcement sources tell TMZ ... the call came in to dispatch at 8:38 AM as a "possible suicide."

    According to the sheriff's dispatch call there was a female employee involved in an argument on the campus, and had sustained a head wound -- possibly from a gun -- before Apple security escorted her out of the building.

    As deputies were responding, they were unclear if there were multiple people involved. At one point cops describe a body being found in a conference room, and say that person had a gun.

    It's increasingly looking like there were 2 people involved since the fatality was reportedly an Hispanic male ... and we know the person with the head wound was a woman.

    Apple's stock plummeted overnight, more than 7% -- crushing the company's value by more than $40 billion.

    Story developing ...

    [​IMG]

    It really is a jungle out there!!!

    Shit just got real at Apple.
     
  2. lastlaugh

    lastlaugh Well-Known Member

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    It wasn't a Steve Jobs clone they found?
     
  3. Mark Mayonnaise

    Mark Mayonnaise You look like a tree! VIP

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    @Kanye West doesn't check the expiration date when he buys eggs
     
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  4. CrucifiedAGT

    CrucifiedAGT He's Around VIP

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    Are they sure he is dead? Maybe hit those two buttons at the same time until the apple logo pops up and see what happens?
     
  5. Lou Loomis

    Lou Loomis Feel the Gern

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    If it's Froggy, I will be IRL sad



































    for those poor paramedics :lo5:
     
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  6. HelloCleveland!

    HelloCleveland! Well-Known Member

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    Well, it's a good thing Apple has that new, gigantic $5 billion headquarters to fall back on.
     
  7. BobWeired

    BobWeired VIP Extreme Gold

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    I felt the same way after their earnings.
     
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  8. DaTenses

    DaTenses Well-Known Member

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    Maybe it was Siri
     
  9. SouthernListen

    SouthernListen I don't follow the crowd. Sorry about that. VIP

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    That's some hard ass security. Suffer a head wound and they escort you out of the building!

    The stock drop was on an after-hours announcement that sales had fallen 13% (or something).
     
  10. Captain

    Captain Alto, Blanco y Guapo Gold

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    Hey, I'm right by there right now. If someone gives Garypage2 Gold and funds his eternal schooling, I'll stop by on behalf of the Shed and leave one of these:

    [​IMG]
     
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  11. Chalupa Batman

    Chalupa Batman Sometimes When I Shit I Cum. Gold

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    Has Hooli stock gone up due to this?
     
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  12. binhphuocngu

    binhphuocngu Well-Known Member

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    Were they the leads of the latest shitty IOs updates? Maybe future updates will work better now.
     
  13. DiamondGoddess

    DiamondGoddess Born Ready for My Close-Up! Gold

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    I was totally "WTF?!!!" about that too, had to re-read it a couple times cuz I didn't believe it.

    (I do acting jobs for tech companies sometimes, and they do have a lot of security, which is understandable.)
     
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  14. Sea Slob

    Sea Slob Well-Known Member

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    Apple is in the crapper and is being far surpassed by Samsung. We'll probably start seeing mass suicides :cheer: @walterHwhite
     
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  15. walterHwhite

    walterHwhite Heisenberg

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    Earning $50 billion in revenue in a quarter is in the crapper? Wish I had those issues :dancin:
     
  16. Sea Slob

    Sea Slob Well-Known Member

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    They just lost about $50 Billion in market cap in one day :lol:
     
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  17. DiamondGoddess

    DiamondGoddess Born Ready for My Close-Up! Gold

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    I admit it, I loled.
     
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  18. Rupert Pupkin

    Rupert Pupkin That Ass is Attached to Daniela Lopez Gold

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    But is spending $150 Billion to buy back its outstanding stock, now at bargin prices.

    I'm not selling my shares.
     
  19. Scarlett Ohara

    Scarlett Ohara VIP Extreme Gold

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    Even half of those issues.
     
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  20. DarkFriday

    DarkFriday Fired as a MOD...Twice. Gold

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    Its those damn night time security robots.
    No mercy...

    [​IMG]
     
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