WTF Bored today? Glory hole etiquette

Discussion in 'The Howard Stern Show' started by MilkyDischarge, Aug 28, 2016.

  1. MilkyDischarge

    MilkyDischarge The "Fuckin' cockroach infestation!" Gold

    Reputations:
    160,495
    Joined:
    Sep 16, 2013
    Messages:
    17,420
    Likes Received:
    32,906
    CONCISE LIST OF DO's and DON'Ts:
    • DO be considerate of your cocksucker
    • DO give your cocksucker a load if he's been working for it
    • DON'T hold out on him
    • DON'T bring a dirty dick into a glory hole
    • DON'T tie up a glory hole booth if you're not in it to have glory hole sex
    • DON'T expect a cocksucker to service you if you can't get it up. All the excuses and talk won't make up for a limp dick.
    • DON'T grab through a hole at a man being serviced or try to steal his attention. Wait your turn.
    • DON'T pose excessively and deprive your cocksucker of your dick. You're at a "Service Station", not onstage at a stripper bar.
    • DON'T aopproach a glory hole owner about sucking your dick if you can't deal with completely anonymous sex.
    • DO respect each other's desire for anonymity.

    Here's the detail...

    First off, as far as Glory Hole Etiquette is concerned, most of the responsibility belongs to the guy getting serviced, and less to the servicer. The one getting serviced should present a clean dick to suck or ride (unless it is arranged ahead of time for him to bring over an unclean dick). The servicee should make no expectations of the servicer beyond getting sucked to orgasm. Whether the cocksucker swallows or not, or whether he will ride the protruding cock, bare or covered, is his choice, not usually the servicee's.

    Personally I think it is rude for a servicee (top) to languish in a cocksucker's mouth and hold back his orgasm for more than 20 min. After that amount of time, most cocksukers want the load. And even the best cocksuckers' jaws can get tired, especially while sucking dick thru a wall in that hunched-down position.

    Also, I think it's rude to go to a private glory hole and use a cocksucker's mouth for a while, then pull out, zip up, and leave without cumming, or to show up at a glory hole tweaked and unable to get a hardon for all the Crisco in San Francisco. Both have happened to me in my private endeavors, and they are both a real turnoff.

    "Public" glory holes, like the kind that can be found in sex clubs, present another series of problems that only good glory hole etiquette can solve. Many of the sex club glory hole booths have more than one hole per booth. That can be hot when guys in other booths all start sticking their cocks thru for you to suck. However, etiquette says that if a guy is being serviced thru one hole, it is bad form to try to grab at his dick. ass, or balls in an attempt to get that dick in your mouth. Wait your turn. If he's interested in more than one mouth, he'll try you out. Otherwise, deal with it.

    Another particularly irritating problem at sex clubs happens when two guys who, for whatever reason, hide out in a glory hole booth in order to play with each other exclusively. That ties up a booth that could be used by guys who want to get sucked off and it pisses off the guys waiting for dick. Rule of thumb here: if you're going to enter a glory hole booth, you'd better be prepared to play with those who are hanging out in the neighboring booths. Otherwise find a dark corner or some other private area... or go the fuck home with each other. This used to happen a lot at the sex clubs in LA, and it was very frustrating. Be considerate of others.

    Another thing that irks me in a glroy hole scene are the guys who let you suck them for a few minutes then pull out, back up, and start posing for you. Who needs that? Give me the goddamned dick or get out.

    And then there are the guys who want your picture, your detailed stats and your whole fucking life history before agreeing to meet for a cock sucking. That's pure bullshit. Glory holes are designed to be anonymous. It's dick to mouth, period. If guys can't deal with that, they should look elsewhere for a blowjob. You wouldn't ask a guy at a truck stop glory hole for his picture first... don't ask the guy who has taken the initiative to provide you with a legally safe glory hole for one.

    Now, on the subject of legality... that largely depends on the laws of your area. Solicitation is defined locally, and as such, what might be considered solicitation in one county or state might not be construed as such somewhere else. Lewd Conduct is pretty much the same, as are Sodomy laws. Generally speaking, sucking dick at your own private glory hole is pretty much a private agreement between two adults and isn't considered lewd (though sucking dick ANYWHERE may be considered in violation of state sodomy laws. You should check into your local statutes).

    Still, while it may all be innocent fun, you should remember a couple of things: no matter what the circumstances, having any kind of sexual contact with a minor can get you busted, even if they falsify their age or have a fake ID. The law doesn't care most of the time if you've been fooled. Sex with a minor will get you arrested and result in a child-molestation or sex offender record.

    Another thing to remember is that your glory hole is in your house, which is private property. If someone contacts you and subsequently tries to arrest you, that is entrapment... but only if they contacted you. If you contact them and they bust you, they'll call that "solicitation" even if no money is involved. It is always best to let the meat come to you, rather than going in search of it. You are better protected that way.

    And yes, in most places, accepting payment (even in tips) can be construed as prostitution. Best to avoid that kind of trouble. If you hang out your glory hole shingle on the internet you should have enough response coming to you that you shouldn't have to go looking for dick too often.

    Again, the best way to get the answers you need is to look up your local county and state statutes on solicitation, lewd conduct and sodomy
     
    Guacamole, Airwolf and WillyBest like this.
  2. Kool

    Kool Well-Known Member Banned User

    Reputations:
    5,537
    Joined:
    Mar 12, 2012
    Messages:
    10,244
    Likes Received:
    11,305
    Him? I thought her?
     
    TeeDonkey and Shivvy like this.
  3. Shivvy

    Shivvy VIP Extreme Gold

    Reputations:
    197,219
    Joined:
    May 23, 2011
    Messages:
    148,756
    Likes Received:
    79,677
    Him? :wtf:
     
    SouthernListen and TeeDonkey like this.
  4. Tipsey Russell

    Tipsey Russell VIP Extreme Gold

    Reputations:
    41,910
    Joined:
    Nov 26, 2013
    Messages:
    16,244
    Likes Received:
    38,472
    the dirty dick one means poop right?

    don't have a poopy dick?
    that's sound policy in most situations
     
  5. sumtexan

    sumtexan Consentido de Dios Gold

    Reputations:
    39,208
    Joined:
    Oct 9, 2012
    Messages:
    8,587
    Likes Received:
    8,757
    Bro, you ain't right in the head.
     
  6. Donkey Patrol

    Donkey Patrol The Mouthy One Gold

    Reputations:
    191,145
    Joined:
    Jan 15, 2014
    Messages:
    12,596
    Likes Received:
    36,265
    It's a hole you stick your dick through

    Fuck etiquette
     
    Bryce and TeeDonkey like this.
  7. Donkey Patrol

    Donkey Patrol The Mouthy One Gold

    Reputations:
    191,145
    Joined:
    Jan 15, 2014
    Messages:
    12,596
    Likes Received:
    36,265
    It's a AIDS trap door
     
    Wangold and TheWonk like this.
  8. VAsiCkBoy

    VAsiCkBoy Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    138
    Joined:
    Dec 14, 2011
    Messages:
    10,125
    Likes Received:
    1,147
  9. Slow

    Slow Just a gangster I suppose Gold

    Reputations:
    339,739
    Joined:
    Jan 13, 2014
    Messages:
    25,798
    Likes Received:
    114,837
  10. bennymuso

    bennymuso England's Finest

    Reputations:
    70,277
    Joined:
    Mar 3, 2015
    Messages:
    5,828
    Likes Received:
    8,213
    What if its caitlyn jenner on the other side.
     
    Biff DiBiase and MilkyDischarge like this.
  11. lovetalkradio

    lovetalkradio Well-Known Member Banned User

    Reputations:
    9,901
    Joined:
    Feb 1, 2014
    Messages:
    8,800
    Likes Received:
    9,228
    Someone's gunning for your job.
     
    Slow likes this.
  12. TheWonk

    TheWonk POTY Music Forum Gold

    Reputations:
    313,154
    Joined:
    Jan 19, 2012
    Messages:
    10,278
    Likes Received:
    31,089
    Bryce likes this.
  13. Jayla

    Jayla Ou ai-je l'esprit? Gold

    Reputations:
    204,690
    Joined:
    May 12, 2013
    Messages:
    33,341
    Likes Received:
    74,859
    Do you want me to make a joke about Mr. Milky being an odd fellow or contrast my boring, white bread life with the perversion of this board?
     
  14. keywordpk

    keywordpk Perpetual Geek Gold

    Reputations:
    312
    Joined:
    Sep 16, 2010
    Messages:
    35,573
    Likes Received:
    3,789
    :umm:
     
    babybear likes this.
  15. Scarlett Ohara

    Scarlett Ohara VIP Extreme Gold

    Reputations:
    224,816
    Joined:
    Mar 9, 2012
    Messages:
    7,760
    Likes Received:
    29,818
    Is there something you want to tell us?
     
    Last edited: Aug 28, 2016
  16. Tony Macaroni

    Tony Macaroni Member

    Reputations:
    0
    Joined:
    Aug 25, 2016
    Messages:
    29
    Likes Received:
    64
    Sorry I'm only familiar with the glory holes where women do all the sucking.
     
    MilkyDischarge likes this.
  17. MilkyDischarge

    MilkyDischarge The "Fuckin' cockroach infestation!" Gold

    Reputations:
    160,495
    Joined:
    Sep 16, 2013
    Messages:
    17,420
    Likes Received:
    32,906
    How do you know it's a broad?
    A mouth is a mouth.
     
    meanredhed likes this.
  18. TheWonk

    TheWonk POTY Music Forum Gold

    Reputations:
    313,154
    Joined:
    Jan 19, 2012
    Messages:
    10,278
    Likes Received:
    31,089
    Bowff.


    Ha, no such thing. Looks like you've been fooled before.
     
  19. Scarlett Ohara

    Scarlett Ohara VIP Extreme Gold

    Reputations:
    224,816
    Joined:
    Mar 9, 2012
    Messages:
    7,760
    Likes Received:
    29,818
    Unless that mouth belongs to a man I don't want it near me.
     
  20. Haze Dean

    Haze Dean Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    12,653
    Joined:
    Feb 2, 2015
    Messages:
    820
    Likes Received:
    936
    Best ones are where someone sets it up right in their apartment/home. In/out & done!
     
    MilkyDischarge likes this.