Burger King Emergency Meeting Transcript 3/10/12

Discussion in 'The Bar' started by Jim J Jiblets, Mar 12, 2012.

  1. Jim J Jiblets

    Jim J Jiblets #Hillary'sTongue

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    "Gary, let's get this meeting started."
    "You heard 'em boys, let's take our seats. So, marketing and strategy, what do you have for us..."
    "Well, as Im sure you're all aware, we've built up quite a head of steam moving into the second quarter. We've got a few ideas that should ensure we meet those quarterly projections. Parsons, can you hit the lights? (*thurt*) So, as you can see on this first slide, we've stuck with the traditional RED Heinz for 52 consecutive years. And why not...our condiment sales have always exceeded cost."
    "I was raised on the stuff fer christs sakes..."
    "I think we all were, Resin. We all were."
    "Question. Since when, and Gary feel free to correct me here, but I was unaware that we were offering condiments as a for sale menu item."
    "Corporate call."
    "So, what we're looking at really involves a more seasonal approach. It's a sensible option that is catered to the generation x, Irish demo. And I think we may have found a niche market. Ladies and gentlemen, our team presents..."
     
  2. Mr. Potato Head

    Mr. Potato Head ~Would Like to Play~ Gold

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  3. Mark Mayonnaise

    Mark Mayonnaise You look like a tree! VIP

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    This is probably the worst thread that anyone has ever posted in the history of the universe
     
  4. Mark Mayonnaise

    Mark Mayonnaise You look like a tree! VIP

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    That said, I fucking want some BK
     
  5. Jim J Jiblets

    Jim J Jiblets #Hillary'sTongue

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    ...scrambling to get the rest posted...hold tight
     
  6. Jack-A-Roe

    Jack-A-Roe Active Member

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    i HATE when fast food tries to charge me for condiments, fuck you! im already eating shit beef thats 60% lean and full of fillers
     
  7. Jim J Jiblets

    Jim J Jiblets #Hillary'sTongue

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    "Gary, let's get this meeting started."
    "You heard 'em boys, let's take our seats. So, marketing and strategy, what do you have for us..."
    "Well, as Im sure you're all aware, we've built up quite a head of steam moving into the second quarter. We've got a few ideas that should ensure we meet those quarterly projections. Parsons, can you hit the lights? (*thurt*) So, as you can see on this first slide, we've stuck with the traditional RED Heinz for 52 consecutive years. And why not...our condiment sales have always exceeded cost."
    "I was raised on the stuff fer christs sakes..."
    "I think we all were, Resin. We all were."
    "Question. Since when, and Gary feel free to correct me here, but I was unaware that we were offering condiments as a for sale menu item."
    "Corporate call."
    "So, what we're looking at really involves a more seasonal approach. It's a sensible option that is catered to the generation x, Irish demo. And I think we may have found a niche market. Ladies and gentlemen, our team presents..."
     
  8. Jim J Jiblets

    Jim J Jiblets #Hillary'sTongue

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    Is that the same article?

    Edit: Now I see it. Hold on, scramblin' here.
     
  9. Jim J Jiblets

    Jim J Jiblets #Hillary'sTongue

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    Part II

    "...Green Ketchup."
     
  10. wanker

    wanker New Member

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    this thread has potential
     
  11. Mark Mayonnaise

    Mark Mayonnaise You look like a tree! VIP

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    This seriously is the worst thread in the history of existence
     
  12. HaroldJackson

    HaroldJackson Well-Known Member

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    Didn't they try that in like 2000
     
  13. Jim J Jiblets

    Jim J Jiblets #Hillary'sTongue

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    I blew it. You're right.

    I was trying to capture the audience's imagination. Obviously, the picture I painted didn't really evoke the vivid imagery I was hoping to convey.

    It's hard to be a good poster sometimes.
     
  14. Jim J Jiblets

    Jim J Jiblets #Hillary'sTongue

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    #bkemergencymeetig hashtag for twitter
     
  15. Jim J Jiblets

    Jim J Jiblets #Hillary'sTongue

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    #bkemergencymeting

    Edit: meeting
     
  16. Jim J Jiblets

    Jim J Jiblets #Hillary'sTongue

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    Apologies to the Burger King corporate offices. #bkemergencymeeting #greenketchup
     
  17. gwartney

    gwartney Unafilliated Gold

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    You ever start a thread you just wish you could take back?
     
  18. Jim J Jiblets

    Jim J Jiblets #Hillary'sTongue

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    Word of the wise. Don't rush a thread. I was scramblin' tonight to get that transcript uploaded onto Microsoft Word to copy and paste into the thread box.

    #dontrushathread
     
  19. gwartney

    gwartney Unafilliated Gold

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    Happens to everyone. Hell, I've started 4 or 5 threads that I could hardly type I was laughing so hard. Got about three responses, usually one of them somebody making cricket sounds.
     
  20. Jim J Jiblets

    Jim J Jiblets #Hillary'sTongue

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    Luckily, the responses have been pretty good in this case. I pushed the upscroll and I see there's a couple questions / comments amongst the content-based posts Ive provided.