WTF Caution: masturbation may summon sex demons

Discussion in 'The Howard Stern Show' started by MilkyDischarge, Mar 6, 2016.

  1. MilkyDischarge

    MilkyDischarge Se suelto el diablo Gold

    Reputations:
    69,302
    Joined:
    Sep 16, 2013
    Messages:
    8,059
    Likes Received:
    13,628
    image.jpeg Masturbation Opens Spiritual Portals
    In the world of the spirit and according to Jesus Christ: the sexual thought is the same as the sexual act (Matthew 5:28).

    When we use the powerful force of imaging something as if it were real, we are actually attracting that which we image into physical being.

    When we imagine having sex with another via masturbation, we are actually summoning the power of the spirit realm to manifest the thing we are imagining.

    We've all heard about the law of attraction by now, made popular from books and movies like The Secret. Well the law of attraction also works with sexual imaginings.

    There are such things as sex demons. And the danger in masturbating is that one could inadvertently summon a sex demon to attach itself to you through the act of masturbating. And once that demon attaches, it is difficult to get it to leave. It will drive you to masturbate, even when you don't want to. You'll be hit with urges to play with yourself so powerful that only an orgasm will allow you some temporary relief.

    In worst case scenarios the one demon may gather other unclean spirits to itself to also attach to your life. That way it can wrap you tighter in its web of control, making it that much more difficult for you to get free. And many never do (Matthew 12:43-45).

    By engaging in those acts of sexual impurity you are giving such evil spirits legal access into your life. And they will remain, causing untold personal pain, guilt and shame until the more powerful force of Jesus Christ is used against them to expel them from your life for good—See: Luke 8:29, Luke 9:39 and verse 42; Galatians 5:19-21; 2nd Corinthians 6:17-18
     
    Mike Huntslooce and LaserT like this.
  2. The Booey

    The Booey Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    112,553
    Joined:
    Jan 16, 2012
    Messages:
    11,169
    Likes Received:
    21,191
    God, I hope so!
     
  3. chapped

    chapped Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    384,616
    Joined:
    Jan 6, 2012
    Messages:
    55,632
    Likes Received:
    61,906
    wow... there is a tombstone in my backyard.. and ghost downstairs
    so joke is on the demons
     
  4. The Booey

    The Booey Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    112,553
    Joined:
    Jan 16, 2012
    Messages:
    11,169
    Likes Received:
    21,191
    Amanda Donohoe in Lair of the White Worm

    [​IMG]
     
  5. XXXXX

    XXXXX Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    63,915
    Joined:
    Jan 15, 2014
    Messages:
    3,860
    Likes Received:
    11,312
    Is January Jones a sex demon?

    image.jpeg

    If so, i might be in trouble - big trouble...
     
    Last edited: Mar 7, 2016
    RONNIE THE CLAW likes this.
  6. Dick Fitzwell

    Dick Fitzwell Opinions are like assholes ... and so am I

    Reputations:
    105,888
    Joined:
    Dec 13, 2011
    Messages:
    6,076
    Likes Received:
    13,477
    I'm screwed
     
    RONNIE THE CLAW likes this.
  7. SlipperyVic

    SlipperyVic In Gord We Trust Gold

    Reputations:
    68,195
    Joined:
    Mar 1, 2015
    Messages:
    1,968
    Likes Received:
    5,105
    There's a devil in my dick and demon's in my semen.
     
    FishySausage, icypussy and mrd160 like this.
  8. reno

    reno VIP Extreme Gold

    Reputations:
    322,141
    Joined:
    Jan 10, 2012
    Messages:
    13,677
    Likes Received:
    40,430
    The first time the Devil made me do it. The second time I did it on my on.
     
  9. Brokenbad

    Brokenbad Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    23,315
    Joined:
    Apr 23, 2012
    Messages:
    5,101
    Likes Received:
    4,375
    I talk in tongues.....haahaahaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
     
    MilkyDischarge likes this.
  10. AmishGirl

    AmishGirl Well-Known Member VIP

    Reputations:
    147,105
    Joined:
    May 12, 2012
    Messages:
    24,431
    Likes Received:
    20,764
  11. Just Me

    Just Me VIP Extreme Gold

    Reputations:
    36,069
    Joined:
    Jul 25, 2012
    Messages:
    4,150
    Likes Received:
    6,024
    Is there any pleasure known to man that religion can't ruin?
     
  12. FishySausage

    FishySausage Original Nuttah VIP Gold

    Reputations:
    154,011
    Joined:
    Aug 25, 2010
    Messages:
    12,723
    Likes Received:
    21,702
    The devil's in my huevos?
     
  13. minorsalazar

    minorsalazar Active Member

    Reputations:
    -3,130
    Joined:
    Nov 3, 2013
    Messages:
    222
    Likes Received:
    240
    Bull shit. ....it's called "imagination".
     
    Mike Huntslooce and rogmar like this.
  14. Pill Queen

    Pill Queen Elegantly wasted Gold

    Reputations:
    160,301
    Joined:
    Feb 9, 2014
    Messages:
    7,763
    Likes Received:
    9,827
    Let the demons descend upon me!
     
    babybear likes this.
  15. AmishGirl

    AmishGirl Well-Known Member VIP

    Reputations:
    147,105
    Joined:
    May 12, 2012
    Messages:
    24,431
    Likes Received:
    20,764
  16. Dorb

    Dorb Lovable Old Pig VIP Gold

    Reputations:
    122,562
    Joined:
    Sep 18, 2012
    Messages:
    17,438
    Likes Received:
    18,476
    YEAH! I want one of these sex demons PLEASE!!!
    image.jpeg
     
    XXXXX, MilkyDischarge, Logan and 3 others like this.
  17. LaserT

    LaserT You have to have fun. Gold

    Reputations:
    348,112
    Joined:
    May 3, 2013
    Messages:
    20,087
    Likes Received:
    37,019
  18. LaserT

    LaserT You have to have fun. Gold

    Reputations:
    348,112
    Joined:
    May 3, 2013
    Messages:
    20,087
    Likes Received:
    37,019
    Check please.
     
    Shortwave98 and Dorb like this.
  19. Ben Dover

    Ben Dover Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    47,098
    Joined:
    Oct 15, 2012
    Messages:
    6,932
    Likes Received:
    8,426
    We should listen more to Fappy, the anti-masturbation dolphin

    [​IMG]

    [​IMG]

    [​IMG]

    [​IMG]
     
  20. GLguygardner

    GLguygardner WE DA BEST!! VIP Gold

    Reputations:
    215,047
    Joined:
    Sep 2, 2010
    Messages:
    12,509
    Likes Received:
    25,346
    [​IMG]
    @ARM
     
    Dorb likes this.