Closest you came to a major car accident but somehow avoided it

Discussion in 'The Howard Stern Show' started by Quedee, May 16, 2015.

  1. Quedee

    Quedee Wise Ass Extraordinaire

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    I've had two in my life. The 1st was when I was young and oh-so-stupid. Went to a Yankee game with my friends, had way too many beers and got in my 1986 Celica to drive home. I'm driving on RT 80 and start playing around with my cassette deck. I look up and I'm drifting off into the other lane. So, what do I do? I overcompensate by steering the wheel way to far in the other direction veering one way, then another and when it's over, I am stopped facing oncoming traffic coming at me at 65+ miles per hour. The cars coming at me somehow avoided me and I was able to avoid what could have been instant death. I'll save the 2nd for another time.

    What close calls have you had?
     
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  2. BleedingGums

    BleedingGums Fesh Fox Faggot VIP

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    Ok
     
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  3. teehee

    teehee Friend Of The Friendless VIP

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    upload_2015-5-16_9-26-27.jpeg

    I've had quite a few crashes at grocery store. Does that count??
     
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  4. Bristol Chicken

    Bristol Chicken Free Range and Loving It Gold

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    That was when I heard Howard announce that he was being gracious and giving the fans a rare Thursday show.
    Almost drove the car off a cliff because of the shock and anger.
     
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  5. Mack29

    Mack29 Well-Known Member

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    Was almost broadsided by some asshole being chased by police.
    Was minding my own business coming home from work around 10 at night.
    Had the stereo cranked. Never heard or saw them until they were blasting past me.
    Guy being chased squeezed between me and the guard rail (on an off ramp).
    He was doing 75+ MPH and wrecked at the top of the ramp.
    Scared the shit out of me.
     
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  6. Ta Ta Toothy

    Ta Ta Toothy Well-Known Member

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    I've never had any serious close calls.

    For whatever weird quirk of fate, every accident my cars have been in were happened when they were standing still. I had one idiot side swipe my car while parked in front of my house. Asshole took off like a bat out of hell and never got caught. I have been rear ended three times while stopped at a red light. One cunt smacked into my car while I was waiting at a McDonald's Drive through window. She just got her license the day before.
     
  7. HowieStearn

    HowieStearn HateClub

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    oh-so-stupid
    [​IMG]
     
  8. HowieStearn

    HowieStearn HateClub

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    What close calls have you had?
    I was one of the people who somehow avoided your dumass :c
     
  9. Pooh bear

    Pooh bear Well-Known Member VIP

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    We were driving home late one Fourth of July, I was driving cuz I had stopped drinking earlier. Had both kids in the car.
    I was in the middle lane when I saw headlights coming toward me in the left lane. Me and my husband were like WTF!
    We called 911 but it was too late, the guy crashed into another car and they all died.
    There but for the grace of God.....
     
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  10. HowieStearn

    HowieStearn HateClub

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    pooh, the same thing happened to me, on a divided state highway- a drunk was on the wrong side of the road, saw headlights, and he drove right by me. Thats why its best to stay in the right lane on divided highways
     
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  11. HelloYooHoo

    HelloYooHoo Well-Known Member

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    It happened Sunday. Didn't and couldn't avoid the accident. My father in law passed away and we were headed to the viewing, went to make a left turn and the person behind us was speeding. She then proceeded to try and pass us on the left in the oncoming traffic lane.....that was all she wrote. What a scene.
     
  12. beanporn

    beanporn Well-Known Member

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    I was on I-8 in San Diego headed downtown in my Honda civic. 8 is always busy and traffic moves fast. I was behind a truck hauling a matrress the mattress came out of the bed of the truck. The mattress got sucked up under my car and got caught up in my axle, two tires popped and I started spinning and lost control. Miraculously I was in a pocket where there was no traffic and I did not get hit or hit anyone I just spun out and came to rest in the middle of I-8. Cars zoomed by me but I didn't get hit. A limo in President Clintons's motorcade pulled over and helped me out. Put me in the back of the limo and drove me to service station just off of the freeway.
    As I was spinning in the middle if I-8 I was convinced I was going to get hit. I really lucked out. The asshole whose mattress got me kept driving and never came back.
     
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  13. wife is a whore

    wife is a whore Stripped of POTY for butthurting staff VIP

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    I'm coming down a country road, 40-50MPH in a Nissan Altima. Dipshit enwurd kid was driving a 2door S-10 Blazer, and at a stop sign about to cross the road. I know it is a blind stop looking the way I was coming from and mentioned it to my friend in the passenger seat. Enwurd starts to move, I think he's inching up to look so I keep cruising. Enwurd pulls right out. I nailed the brakes and cut the wheel to the right, leaving a 90degree skid mark before I came to a stop, facing the wrong way, on the opposite side of the intersection from where he was. He stopped right behind me. I screamed out the window, "YOU STUPID MOTHER FUCKER!" and he took off like a bat out of hell. I wasn't going to chase the idiot, but my buddy in the passenger seat wouldn't let me move the car until he caught his breath.

    I will never forget the look of fear in the black chick's face, who was sitting in the passenger seat of that truck. Only other time I seen a black chick's eyes get that big is when my tongue entered her poopchute. If I hit that truck broadside like that, the only likely survivor would have been the idiot driver.

    _____________________________________________________________________________________

    One night I attempted to party hop while drunk and high (weed & shrooms). About 1/2 way to the other party I woke up, driving 45, completely on the grass shoulder of the road. "Fuck there has to be a pole coming up" went through my head as I took my foot off the gas and slowly started to coast back onto the street and avoiding a pole. Pure luck I didn't die that night.

    A friend of mine was almost as lucky one night. He drove home from a party, passed out, then woke up the next morning to his screaming father. "What the fuck did you hit?!!" Guy had no clue. He went and looked at the Toyota pick up he drove the night before. Front end smashed, windshield fucked, scratch and dent on the roof, dent in the bed and the tailgate was bent out. Fucking guy drove through a pole a couple miles from his house. Snapped it, and kept going, so the thing just dragged along the top of the truck, and landed in the bed.
     
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  14. Robert Higgins

    Robert Higgins Well-Known Member VIP

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    On a business trip to Indianapolis about 15 years ago I was driving through the downtown area looking for a restaurant and blew right through a red light at a major intersection. The woman with me in the passenger seat screamed like I've never heard anyone scream before or since. We came within inches of being t-boned by a box truck and as I steered to avoid cars in the oncoming lane we wound up doing a 360 right through the intersection.

    We didn't have a scratch on us but the woman (who I'm still friendly with) reminds me of it once in a while.
     
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  15. reno

    reno VIP Extreme Gold

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    On my bike I wasn't paying attention. A woman ahead of me stopped suddenly. I could lay the bike down, run into her or try to go around her on the little bit of gravel between the woods and the road. went around her on the gravel. Fish tailed like crazy but kept her up. I had to stop until my knees stopped knocking.
     
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  16. goldtopper

    goldtopper Well Known Heterosexual Gold

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    I was coming down a low valley road in bluff country at 4am going coyote hunting. Ahead I see lights and as they near, they're veering into my lane. Before I know it, he's fully crossed the lane coming at me head-on. I broke right, but the shoulder was boulders dropping 20 feet down to a trout-rearing pond. He side swiped my and spun me around; he wasn't so lucky- he launched and flew through the air into the trout pond. Two made it to shore and I swam out and got the other four out. Turns out they were illegals, drunk and working local dairy farms. When we were all on land staring at each other, they started approaching me as a group. I lowered my rifle and they all turned and ran.
    A farmer found them in his barn at daylight and they all went to jail.
     
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  17. wife is a whore

    wife is a whore Stripped of POTY for butthurting staff VIP

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    I was almost hit by a deer on my motorcyle one morning. Little one. Came bolting out of the woods, and when he was about a foot from me, he put the brakes on, spun around and ran back to the woods. If I put my right arm out, I could have petted his ass. I was doing about 40.
     
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  18. Dick Nose

    Dick Nose Well-Known Member VIP

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    I was making my last pick up of the day, when a micro burst came through and knocked all the power lines down. I had just enough time to make it across town to the warehouse, I'm soaking wet wipers are going full speed and I can only see a foot or so in front of me. I decide to cut across a parking lot instead of dealing with intersection, for some reason just as I cross sidewalk I hit my brakes two inches from my windshield is a 1"power line if I had gone 2 ft farther I would of chopped my head off.