Dawg: I'm having a bit of an issue.

Discussion in 'The Bar' started by Mark Mayonnaise, Nov 28, 2012.

  1. Mark Mayonnaise

    Mark Mayonnaise You look like a tree! VIP

    Reputations:
    336,917
    Joined:
    Sep 8, 2010
    Messages:
    181,927
    Likes Received:
    64,261
    Last night I took a shit but I was out of toilet paper so I used the cover of the Sports Illustrated with Lebron James on it and today my ass hurts :(
     
  2. Dick Gozinya

    Dick Gozinya Active Member

    Reputations:
    -3
    Joined:
    Aug 9, 2012
    Messages:
    4,758
    Likes Received:
    0
    Reboot your router and unplug your computer for about three days. Maybe four. See if everything feels better then.
     
  3. jackie the jerk

    jackie the jerk Not Mexican VIP

    Reputations:
    1,821
    Joined:
    Aug 20, 2010
    Messages:
    16,500
    Likes Received:
    169
    Lebron is hung.
     
  4. Mark Mayonnaise

    Mark Mayonnaise You look like a tree! VIP

    Reputations:
    336,917
    Joined:
    Sep 8, 2010
    Messages:
    181,927
    Likes Received:
    64,261
    I think I gave myself a 'roid I'm fuckin serious
     
  5. Oderus

    Oderus Going to hell VIP

    Reputations:
    121,852
    Joined:
    Aug 21, 2012
    Messages:
    55,701
    Likes Received:
    3,720
    Was he caught making googly eyes at Massa's daughter again?
     
  6. Charon

    Charon Soulless VIP

    Reputations:
    192,234
    Joined:
    Apr 3, 2012
    Messages:
    23,331
    Likes Received:
    12,867
    Paper cuts on the ass hurt
     
  7. Reggae Mistress

    Reggae Mistress Old Catcher's Mitt

    Reputations:
    205,752
    Joined:
    Jun 16, 2012
    Messages:
    21,444
    Likes Received:
    5,108
    Take the money you were going to spend on a housekeeper and buy some damn toilet paper and preparation H, fool! :grad:
     
  8. Mark Mayonnaise

    Mark Mayonnaise You look like a tree! VIP

    Reputations:
    336,917
    Joined:
    Sep 8, 2010
    Messages:
    181,927
    Likes Received:
    64,261
    You're smart. Should I be worried about a cleaning lady being in my house while I'm gone?

    She's white :dontknow:
     
  9. jackie the jerk

    jackie the jerk Not Mexican VIP

    Reputations:
    1,821
    Joined:
    Aug 20, 2010
    Messages:
    16,500
    Likes Received:
    169
    Answered your own question
     
  10. Shine

    Shine 2012 rookie of the year VIP

    Reputations:
    25
    Joined:
    Jan 16, 2012
    Messages:
    26,036
    Likes Received:
    0
    you have nothing
     
  11. Reggae Mistress

    Reggae Mistress Old Catcher's Mitt

    Reputations:
    205,752
    Joined:
    Jun 16, 2012
    Messages:
    21,444
    Likes Received:
    5,108
    Not if she's insured and bonded. Ask. Also, maybe think about finding a cute young cleaning girl. My brother used to fuck ours, without our knowledge, of course.
     
  12. Reggae Mistress

    Reggae Mistress Old Catcher's Mitt

    Reputations:
    205,752
    Joined:
    Jun 16, 2012
    Messages:
    21,444
    Likes Received:
    5,108
    You must spread some reputation around before giving it to Jackie the jerk again :jj:
     
  13. FatKidSullivan

    FatKidSullivan Smoking Cigars

    Reputations:
    56,127
    Joined:
    Dec 13, 2011
    Messages:
    46,238
    Likes Received:
    14,627
    Why would you use the cover when there are softer pages inside the magazine?
     
  14. wanker

    wanker New Member

    Reputations:
    22
    Joined:
    Dec 13, 2011
    Messages:
    11,211
    Likes Received:
    0
    should change thread to u have no tissue
     
  15. wanker

    wanker New Member

    Reputations:
    22
    Joined:
    Dec 13, 2011
    Messages:
    11,211
    Likes Received:
    0
    much funnier
     
  16. Mark Mayonnaise

    Mark Mayonnaise You look like a tree! VIP

    Reputations:
    336,917
    Joined:
    Sep 8, 2010
    Messages:
    181,927
    Likes Received:
    64,261
    She's not bonded. She has a very nice professional site. She's a little older and married.
     
  17. wanker

    wanker New Member

    Reputations:
    22
    Joined:
    Dec 13, 2011
    Messages:
    11,211
    Likes Received:
    0
  18. jonpow

    jonpow Tennessee Jed VIP

    Reputations:
    49,541
    Joined:
    Sep 18, 2010
    Messages:
    35,794
    Likes Received:
    6,312
    Lebron scores - off the rim
     
  19. zhukov

    zhukov Time traveler VIP

    Reputations:
    94,845
    Joined:
    Feb 6, 2011
    Messages:
    30,760
    Likes Received:
    10,554
    LeBron slam dunks into Chriza's backboard
     
  20. gilaet

    gilaet Zen As Fuck Gold

    Reputations:
    247,458
    Joined:
    Aug 23, 2010
    Messages:
    89,113
    Likes Received:
    22,399