http://hanzi83.tumblr.com/post/142942716000/banned-from-the-show Hanzi's Blogfest Banned From The Show If you had the privilege of tuning into the Stern Show this past week you would’ve heard what some would consider a call but since I barely got words in on both days I called in and made my return. I went in knowing there had to be some kind of set up since Gary had actually booked it on the phone. He has never come to the phone to talk to me while I am on hold due to Howard limiting my access to anything and anyone so I found it odd that the previous week on Wednesday Gary had told me to call in on Monday because Howard is busy with one of his hour long interviews where he projects his insecurities on to his guests and then asks them if they ever got an erection on the set of something then explaining thats what happened to him on the set of Private Parts. I guess because people had been calling to ask about me the last several months on other Howard related shows etc and finally one got through to Howard the day Gary talked to me while on hold. And when Monday came I knew something was strange because I couldn’t get through at first but they were biding their time for Joey Boots and High pitch Eric were in studio. I finally had been on hold and then figured I would probably get on air during the next segment but nope Howard put me on air during their segment to ask if I was joining their appearance for the weekend which he already knew I wouldn’t be because he knows everything and the fact that he would ask me that after months of not being on is even more ridiculous. When he said the week before to the caller who asked why i didn’t get on air anymore. Howard says that its because I don’t call in and then back peddles to say that he can’t get to me all the time because the show is not all about me. Yeah why put me on air when you got more Tradio calls to play mixed with Marianne from Brooklyn bitching on how Simon Cowell is an asshole for wanting Howard’s AGT job or another fake Bobo bit where they make fun of him for attempting something he failed at doing that they told him beforehand to fail at. Suffice it to say my return did not go over well because the Show got Boots and Eric to say a bunch of gay shit while my volume of my voice was turned down but I got some shots in but it was all a ploy to fuck with me and get rid of me for good even though it was clear that happened since August of 2015 when i called him Imus and mentioned Marci Turk , the supposed chick who has Howard brain washed like they are on some Scientology type of shit. That is the apparent story and she has made it impossible for people to talk to Artie who work there. But Howard has no problem playing old bits of Artie’s self destruction no problem. Howard has really become the villain he said he was against his whole career. He is the same hypocrite who bashes other people for playing backstage politics when he does the same and he fucks with people getting any connections or access so i could’ve moved on sooner but the industry won’t let people talk because Stern is a bully so no one will ever speak out because Stern will fuck up their careers while others probably enjoyed doing it because they are just as mentally fucked as Howard and love making people lose their minds but then deny any responsibility for orchestrating that type of behavior to happen He knew what outrageous shit I said about his kids to get his attention in one of my many irrational rants that I went on after he has helped fucking with my head and said things about his wife. I don’t get why he took those personally because he hasn’t been much of a husband and he’s barely been a father but whatever don’t act like Howard has not made a career out of saying the most racist and nastiest things to people. His staff and asshole fan base have made death pools on what people will die. How the fuck are they going to judge me? Especially when they are the ones who constantly push my mental illness to say these sick things. I say it to express it because I have so much anger that I need to express it i know it could make me look bad in the long run but I am not ashamed but I am also not proud. I am a human being who is bi polar and I am constantly being harassed by one man who has his minions do the dirty work then denies it when there has been a constant history of this thing happening with other associates from the show being harassed and it will never be dealt with because Stern is so powerful and he uses it to fuck with others who expose him for the asshole he is. I don’t know if this guy is just playing a bad guy before he has to leave the game because i noticed a sudden serge of old guard types spewing such propaganda like it’s written in stone that the younger guard will expose these assholes. I don’t know what the fuck these people want or what they will do in the future but this shit has got to change. And I am starting to doubt this will ever change and I kn ow people will say “Not with that attitude” but it seems like a no win win because even if I get by with all this and find some kind of peace I know I will never be the same because of the mind games that have been played with me over the course of the last few years. I should have never asked questions and these people thought they could get away with it because i dumbed myself down where people thought they could take advantage of me behind my back and if i dare question it they would make me the one who is the asshole because I am acting paranoid and no one will ever come to me and apologize when others have fucked me over and have yet to apologize for what they contributed to this shit. I have people questioning my mental health and they don’t care because they just want to make themselves feel better for being passive aggressive and at the same time manage to make me feel like a piece of shit but guess what?I am a lot more immune to this shit than people realize. I know these people have to point it out it’s kind of like they are being hack on purpose. They even decided to make it look like I am making multiple accounts on reddit to promote myself on the Sterns how sub reddit. Because no one else talks about the show not unless I am on it and gets more buzz because believe it or not no one is talking about the great celebrity interview Howard did with 5 seconds of Summer. So its official that my time is basically done with the show. People asking me to go back to Artie’s show but if I go back he will give me shit for needing to come back and use it against me for how ever long he wants to because he always needs to make others lesser on the totem pole feel like shit whenever he is unhappy with something and because I am bi-polar I will get irrational and go to disrespectful lengths with shit I say and these people know this so when I do they make me feel even worse for saying it even though they are help pushing it for their own amusement I want to start my own podcast maybe but I don’t have the tools for this shit to start and I really think I earned my right to be paid for this shit and I am tiring of doing spots on others shows when I bring an audience and I get nothing out of it and i I dare speak my mind and explain why I should be valued more they say I am a mark for myself or I should do it for fun when they are getting whatever perks they want behind the scenes but never disclose this and pretend its all hard work and sacrifice when there are other factors They have the luxury of knowing what their future will bring at some point but will never tell you about that part of the hard work because it is a hidden rule they will never teach you because they rather advertise pretentious rules that no one really follows and the ones that do are the ones who end up on the lowest level because they would have paid the price of living like a naive shit head who would believe people and then be shocked when you found out they are just as much of liar as the next guy. The show can move on so easy and yet still play my bits on the Sternthology replays and I will never get a cent for it because why even pay me for the bits they made money off. They promised me things and never delivered and secretly let others in my life and just about anywhere locally have gotten what they want when they want and they do it secretly and the show knows I will have resentment for it its just another subtle way to make me feel like shit and make me feel excluded. Because you guys get it? Making a depressive Pakistani living in his parents basment who is just smoking and bitching on social media is so fucking hilarious. Yeah why use your power to take on the elite causing harm to innocent people? Just pick on powerless social outcasts for the remainder of your career. One day the evil shit you did will get out there. I hate how much of a shit sandwich you made me eat for the decade I have been on the show and never once gave me the props I deserve and how much beneath the surface you tried to pursue me to be on the show and yet you will act like I did nothing and was just a fucking whack packer who called into the show and nothing more. Fuck you and fuck the show for what you have done to me and how much time I wasted when you never gave a fuck about me and if you did you never showed that on the air and had to do shit behind the scnes whether it was for my benefit or not. Fuck it. I just don’t want to exist anymore. But they will keep me on this planet so they can continue to make money behind my back off me and then act like i am fucking delusional.