Elegant Elliot......at Kmart

Discussion in 'The Howard Stern Show' started by Nemo, Jan 26, 2015.

  1. Nemo

    Nemo Beer Can Thick Gold

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  2. Nemo

    Nemo Beer Can Thick Gold

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  3. Nemo

    Nemo Beer Can Thick Gold

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  4. RonHeinzkaboot

    RonHeinzkaboot Adultophile

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    Who still shops at Kmart?
     
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  5. MyLazyHand

    MyLazyHand Russia and France Know What to Do

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    What is in its hair?


    How is this person not locked away in prison indefinitely?
     
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  6. Butcher

    Butcher ?

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    Chlamydia victim
     
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  7. Javaforgotme

    Javaforgotme Well-Known Member Banned User

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    The color Black really does go with everything!
     
  8. John Smith

    John Smith Well-Known Member VIP

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    He looks like the last shit I took.
     
  9. reno

    reno VIP Extreme Gold

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    Kmart, that's a shitty store in gangster talk.
     
  10. MyLazyHand

    MyLazyHand Russia and France Know What to Do

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    You need to see a doctor.
     
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  11. Butcher

    Butcher ?

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    Go stick another hairbrush up yer ass
     
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  12. Limo Wreck

    Limo Wreck Aboard the great mothership Gold

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    Amber Lamps v2.0
     
  13. killallposers

    killallposers VIP Extreme Gold

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    Elliot still keeping it real without the Stern show. It was no put on.

    Man, how I wish someone filmed his k-mart meltdown.
     
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  14. MyLazyHand

    MyLazyHand Russia and France Know What to Do

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    I have a feeling we've all seen it before....riiiiight?
     
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  15. killallposers

    killallposers VIP Extreme Gold

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    Riiiiight. But I miss it.
     
  16. MyLazyHand

    MyLazyHand Russia and France Know What to Do

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    Offen was a major criminal before and during his Stern Show years and he literally killed an old lady.

    And yet somehow he's not locked up.
     
  17. killallposers

    killallposers VIP Extreme Gold

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    Oh yeah, I forgot about the lady. I think it was deemed an accident. I don't remember any details or if I ever knew any. I seem to remember him being on the show once afterwards to discuss it and wouldn't say anything.
     
  18. MyLazyHand

    MyLazyHand Russia and France Know What to Do

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    Elliot Offen was arrested for lewd conduct, shoplifting, and assault at Classy & Sassy ladies boutique, on Reid street.


    Authorities documented in a police report that Elliot Offen entered the Classy & Sassy boutique at approximately 11:15 a.m. After failing to emerge from a ladies dressing room stall, store clerks knocked on the door asking if he was 'ok' or needed assistance. Elliot Offen was then reported to have exited the dressing room wearing high heel shoes, women's thong underwear and matching bra along with a dress wrapped around his head as a hat.

    Elliot Offen allegedly began dancing and skipping around the store shouting "I'm a pretty princess" over and over, according to witness reports. When asked by the manager to leave the store, Elliot Offen squatted in the front lobby and defecated on the floor. He then picked up his feces with his hand, took a bite, and asked store patrons if they wanted a bite of his cake to celebrate his birthday.

    Clearly becoming a threat to others, one of the female clerks tackled Elliot Offen, and with the assistance of two other women he was restrained until police arrived at the scene.

    Mary Smith, one of the store clerks told UJ reporters, "I only weigh 105 pounds and didn't think I could tackle him, but he went down really easily. He's very weak, and very disturbed."

    Initial toxicology reports indicate that Elliot Offen was high on a mixture of narcotics and prescription drugs at the time of the incident. Results of a psychological exam to determine if he will face possible jail time or be institutionalized are pending.
     
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  19. piledriver123

    piledriver123 Wonky hunter and Shed lover

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    Cuntface!!!! Right???!!!!
     
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  20. daphnejoanes

    daphnejoanes Vodka Swilling Cat VIP

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    Cunt face is one of my favorite expressions. I use it often.