Discussion in 'The Bar' started by RH Goatcabin, Aug 24, 2012.
Please examine and rank this tantalizing stuffbiscuit.
Cameltoe.....ready to go!
real fake boobs,i give her 10.
So yesterday I declined an offer to go to a party with her. She hit me up on facebook earlier today and we started shooting the shit, and she asked if it would be ok if she maybe came over later. I said sure, and she mentioned she was really hungover etc.
Anyways, at around 8pm I go outside and meet her, and the first thing that happens is that she's annoyed that I hadn't met her closer to her place, since I had said I'd meet her half way. She also got annoyed when she found out my sister was staying over, because her and I are starting a band together, and she wanted to practice a bit - she's on vocals. I said it would be totally cool anyways and my sister would be in her room, but my ex insisted she would not sing with her there.
The first thing we do is just start chatting, and apparently they had met my "best" friend and his gf at a bar yesterday, and it had been all weird. She told me about how the night had went, and threw in several times that she would totally fuck my "best" friend...which was really weird to hear. She also said that 2 guys had been hitting on her super hard in a creepy way, but she was really weird about it, because she didn't appear to think they were creeps?*
Anyways, I start showing her some songs I'd like to cover, she shoots down most of them and says they don't suit her voice, which was a bit of a bummer, but after a while we get into the groove of things and we were both agreeing on cool songs we'd like to do. She begins to get comfortable and actually starts singing to the songs, which was the idea, and she actually sounds really good. Before long we've got our favorite song blasting, I'm on bass (not plugged in) and she's singing like crazy, and shit's really fun. We do this until it's like 11pm, and move on to just showing each other our favorite live performances on youtube. She shows me a local band that she knows most of the members in, and mentions that one of the dudes is like the perfect guy and she'd totally fuck him.
The song we were singing the most was a song from the movie Scott Pilgrim VS The World, which was the movie we had watched together our first date at my place that eventually led to the most embarrassing and awkward sexy time...EVER. Anyways, she mentions she really wants to see it again and that we should watch it later. So when it's 11:30pm and we've watched a bunch of youtube, I ask if we're gonna watch the movie, and she's like sure but then we need to start right away cause I don't have a lot of time.
I start the movie. She's laying on the short side of the L shaped couch again, while I'm sitting on the long side, sort of in the middle. It's a bit awkward because the 4 other move nights that week we'd sorta sat/lay together, but because the other seats were taken. So now I'm sitting there feeling a bit weird and annoyed cause it's actually a huge step back.
For anyone who's seen the movie, the first hour has a lot of sorta romantic awkward moments between the lead male character and the girl he likes. Suddenly during one of the scenes, she leans over laughing a bit and says "do you know who he reminds me of?", and I go "haha of course, he's just like me!". She laughs and says yeah cause he's so awkward and insecure, and she starts leaning against me and running her hands over my chest and back of my hair, while saying I'm totally awkward about it. I sorta nervously laugh and sit still like a manikin, and she sorta snuggles up to my arm/shoulder and stays there. Sitting completely still, she's on my right, but my arm is straight down so her head is effectively resting on my hard shoulder, and I'm feeling incredibly awkward. Am I suppose to put my arm around her? I know this is uncomfortable for her, but I don't really know what she wants me to do? And of course all I can think of is sex.
After about 10 minutes she sits back up and lays down on the short side again. About halfway through the movie, she exclaims she needs to leave because she's working early the next day. I stop the movie, and start putting on my shoes to follow her to her place. By now it's like..1:30am or so. While getting ready to leave, we small chat about how our little music session went, and I say I believe she can sing the song flawlessly if she just believes in her abilities *she then says I need to believe in mine?
I walk her home, we chat a bit, and then walk back.
Not expecting many to read through this, but for those of you interested, that's the latest update
This thread needs cock rings.
she looks like my ex
that was a fan of Skrillex
thats a good one
I'd fuck her
7.5 Would love to bang.
d: ǝʇɐpdn ʇsǝʇɐן ǝɥʇ s,ʇɐɥʇ 'pǝʇsǝɹǝʇuı noʎ ɟo ǝsoɥʇ ɹoɟ ʇnq 'sıɥʇ ɥbnoɹɥʇ pɐǝɹ oʇ ʎuɐɯ buıʇɔǝdxǝ ʇou
˙ʞɔɐq ʞןɐʍ uǝɥʇ puɐ 'ʇıq ɐ ʇɐɥɔ ǝʍ 'ǝɯoɥ ɹǝɥ ʞןɐʍ ı
Â¿ǝuıɯ uı ǝʌǝıןǝq oʇ pǝǝu ı sʎɐs uǝɥʇ ǝɥs* sǝıʇıןıqɐ ɹǝɥ uı sǝʌǝıןǝq ʇsnظ ǝɥs ɟı ʎןssǝןʍɐןɟ buos ǝɥʇ buıs uɐɔ ǝɥs ǝʌǝıןǝq ı ʎɐs ı puɐ 'ʇuǝʍ uoıssǝs ɔısnɯ ǝןʇʇıן ɹno ʍoɥ ʇnoqɐ ʇɐɥɔ ןןɐɯs ǝʍ 'ǝʌɐǝן oʇ ʎpɐǝɹ buıʇʇǝb ǝןıɥʍ ˙os ɹo ɯɐ03:1˙˙ǝʞıן s,ʇı ʍou ʎq ˙ǝɔɐןd ɹǝɥ oʇ ɹǝɥ ʍoןןoɟ oʇ sǝoɥs ʎɯ uo buıʇʇnd ʇɹɐʇs puɐ 'ǝıʌoɯ ǝɥʇ doʇs ı ˙ʎɐp ʇxǝu ǝɥʇ ʎןɹɐǝ buıʞɹoʍ s,ǝɥs ǝsnɐɔǝq ǝʌɐǝן oʇ spǝǝu ǝɥs sɯıɐןɔxǝ ǝɥs 'ǝıʌoɯ ǝɥʇ ɥbnoɹɥʇ ʎɐʍɟןɐɥ ʇnoqɐ ˙uıɐbɐ ǝpıs ʇɹoɥs ǝɥʇ uo uʍop sʎɐן puɐ dn ʞɔɐq sʇıs ǝɥs sǝʇnuıɯ 01 ʇnoqɐ ɹǝʇɟɐ
˙xǝs sı ɟo ʞuıɥʇ uɐɔ ı ןןɐ ǝsɹnoɔ ɟo puɐ Â¿op oʇ ǝɯ sʇuɐʍ ǝɥs ʇɐɥʍ ʍouʞ ʎןןɐǝɹ ʇ,uop ı ʇnq 'ɹǝɥ ɹoɟ ǝןqɐʇɹoɟɯoɔun sı sıɥʇ ʍouʞ ı Â¿ɹǝɥ punoɹɐ ɯɹɐ ʎɯ ʇnd oʇ ǝsoddns ı ɯɐ ˙pɹɐʍʞʍɐ ʎןqıpǝɹɔuı buıןǝǝɟ ɯ,ı puɐ 'ɹǝpןnoɥs pɹɐɥ ʎɯ uo buıʇsǝɹ ʎןǝʌıʇɔǝɟɟǝ sı pɐǝɥ ɹǝɥ os uʍop ʇɥbıɐɹʇs sı ɯɹɐ ʎɯ ʇnq 'ʇɥbıɹ ʎɯ uo s,ǝɥs 'ןןıʇs ʎןǝʇǝןdɯoɔ buıʇʇıs ˙ǝɹǝɥʇ sʎɐʇs puɐ ɹǝpןnoɥs/ɯɹɐ ʎɯ oʇ dn sǝןbbnus ɐʇɹos ǝɥs puɐ 'uıʞıuɐɯ ɐ ǝʞıן ןןıʇs ʇıs puɐ ɥbnɐן ʎןsnoʌɹǝu ɐʇɹos ı ˙ʇı ʇnoqɐ pɹɐʍʞʍɐ ʎןןɐʇoʇ ɯ,ı buıʎɐs ǝןıɥʍ 'ɹıɐɥ ʎɯ ɟo ʞɔɐq puɐ ʇsǝɥɔ ʎɯ ɹǝʌo spuɐɥ ɹǝɥ buıuunɹ puɐ ǝɯ ʇsuıɐbɐ buıuɐǝן sʇɹɐʇs ǝɥs puɐ 'ǝɹnɔǝsuı puɐ pɹɐʍʞʍɐ os s,ǝɥ ǝsnɐɔ ɥɐǝʎ sʎɐs puɐ sɥbnɐן ǝɥs ˙"Â¡ǝɯ ǝʞıן ʇsnظ s,ǝɥ 'ǝsɹnoɔ ɟo ɐɥɐɥ" ob ı puɐ '"Â¿ɟo ǝɯ spuıɯǝɹ ǝɥ oɥʍ ʍouʞ noʎ op" sʎɐs puɐ ʇıq ɐ buıɥbnɐן ɹǝʌo suɐǝן ǝɥs 'sǝuǝɔs ǝɥʇ ɟo ǝuo buıɹnp ʎןuǝppns ˙sǝʞıן ǝɥ ןɹıb ǝɥʇ puɐ ɹǝʇɔɐɹɐɥɔ ǝןɐɯ pɐǝן ǝɥʇ uǝǝʍʇǝq sʇuǝɯoɯ pɹɐʍʞʍɐ ɔıʇuɐɯoɹ ɐʇɹos ɟo ʇoן ɐ sɐɥ ɹnoɥ ʇsɹıɟ ǝɥʇ 'ǝıʌoɯ ǝɥʇ uǝǝs s,oɥʍ ǝuoʎuɐ ɹoɟ
˙ʞɔɐq dǝʇs ǝbnɥ ɐ ʎןןɐnʇɔɐ s,ʇı ǝsnɐɔ pǝʎouuɐ puɐ pɹıǝʍ ʇıq ɐ buıןǝǝɟ ǝɹǝɥʇ buıʇʇıs ɯ,ı ʍou os ˙uǝʞɐʇ ǝɹǝʍ sʇɐǝs ɹǝɥʇo ǝɥʇ ǝsnɐɔǝq ʇnq 'ɹǝɥʇǝboʇ ʎɐן/ʇɐs ɐʇɹos p,ǝʍ ʞǝǝʍ ʇɐɥʇ sʇɥbıu ǝʌoɯ ɹǝɥʇo 4 ǝɥʇ ǝsnɐɔǝq pɹɐʍʞʍɐ ʇıq ɐ s,ʇı ˙ǝןppıɯ ǝɥʇ uı ɟo ʇɹos 'ǝpıs buoן ǝɥʇ uo buıʇʇıs ɯ,ı ǝןıɥʍ 'uıɐbɐ ɥɔnoɔ pǝdɐɥs ן ǝɥʇ ɟo ǝpıs ʇɹoɥs ǝɥʇ uo buıʎɐן s,ǝɥs ˙ǝıʌoɯ ǝɥʇ ʇɹɐʇs ı
˙ǝɯıʇ ɟo ʇoן ɐ ǝʌɐɥ ʇ,uop ı ǝsnɐɔ ʎɐʍɐ ʇɥbıɹ ʇɹɐʇs oʇ pǝǝu ǝʍ uǝɥʇ ʇnq ǝɹns ǝʞıן s,ǝɥs puɐ 'ǝıʌoɯ ǝɥʇ ɥɔʇɐʍ ɐuuob ǝɹ,ǝʍ ɟı ʞsɐ ı 'ǝqnʇnoʎ ɟo ɥɔunq ɐ pǝɥɔʇɐʍ ǝʌ,ǝʍ puɐ ɯd03:11 s,ʇı uǝɥʍ os ˙ɹǝʇɐן ʇı ɥɔʇɐʍ pןnoɥs ǝʍ ʇɐɥʇ puɐ uıɐbɐ ʇı ǝǝs oʇ sʇuɐʍ ʎןןɐǝɹ ǝɥs suoıʇuǝɯ ǝɥs 'sʎɐʍʎuɐ ˙ɹǝʌǝ˙˙˙ǝɯıʇ ʎxǝs pɹɐʍʞʍɐ puɐ buıssɐɹɹɐqɯǝ ʇsoɯ ǝɥʇ oʇ pǝן ʎןןɐnʇuǝʌǝ ʇɐɥʇ ǝɔɐןd ʎɯ ʇɐ ǝʇɐp ʇsɹıɟ ɹno ɹǝɥʇǝboʇ pǝɥɔʇɐʍ pɐɥ ǝʍ ǝıʌoɯ ǝɥʇ sɐʍ ɥɔıɥʍ 'pןɹoʍ ǝɥʇ sʌ ɯıɹbןıd ʇʇoɔs ǝıʌoɯ ǝɥʇ ɯoɹɟ buos ɐ sɐʍ ʇsoɯ ǝɥʇ buıbuıs ǝɹǝʍ ǝʍ buos ǝɥʇ
˙ɯıɥ ʞɔnɟ ʎןןɐʇoʇ p,ǝɥs puɐ ʎnb ʇɔǝɟɹǝd ǝɥʇ ǝʞıן sı sǝpnp ǝɥʇ ɟo ǝuo ʇɐɥʇ suoıʇuǝɯ puɐ 'uı sɹǝqɯǝɯ ǝɥʇ ɟo ʇsoɯ sʍouʞ ǝɥs ʇɐɥʇ puɐq ןɐɔoן ɐ ǝɯ sʍoɥs ǝɥs ˙ǝqnʇnoʎ uo sǝɔuɐɯɹoɟɹǝd ǝʌıן ǝʇıɹoʌɐɟ ɹno ɹǝɥʇo ɥɔɐǝ buıʍoɥs ʇsnظ oʇ uo ǝʌoɯ puɐ 'ɯd11 ǝʞıן s,ʇı ןıʇun sıɥʇ op ǝʍ ˙unɟ ʎןןɐǝɹ s,ʇıɥs puɐ 'ʎzɐɹɔ ǝʞıן buıbuıs s,ǝɥs puɐ (uı pǝbbnןd ʇou) ssɐq uo ɯ,ı 'buıʇsɐןq buos ǝʇıɹoʌɐɟ ɹno ʇob ǝʌ,ǝʍ buoן ǝɹoɟǝq ˙poob ʎןןɐǝɹ spunos ʎןןɐnʇɔɐ ǝɥs puɐ 'ɐǝpı ǝɥʇ sɐʍ ɥɔıɥʍ 'sbuos ǝɥʇ oʇ buıbuıs sʇɹɐʇs ʎןןɐnʇɔɐ puɐ ǝןqɐʇɹoɟɯoɔ ʇǝb oʇ suıbǝq ǝɥs ˙op oʇ ǝʞıן p,ǝʍ sbuos ןooɔ uo buıǝǝɹbɐ ɥʇoq ǝɹǝʍ ǝʍ puɐ sbuıɥʇ ɟo ǝʌooɹb ǝɥʇ oʇuı ʇǝb ǝʍ ǝןıɥʍ ɐ ɹǝʇɟɐ ʇnq 'ɹǝɯɯnq ɐ ɟo ʇıq ɐ sɐʍ ɥɔıɥʍ 'ǝɔıoʌ ɹǝɥ ʇıns ʇ,uop ʎǝɥʇ sʎɐs puɐ ɯǝɥʇ ɟo ʇsoɯ uʍop sʇooɥs ǝɥs 'ɹǝʌoɔ oʇ ǝʞıן p,ı sbuos ǝɯos ɹǝɥ buıʍoɥs ʇɹɐʇs ı 'sʎɐʍʎuɐ
*Â¿sdǝǝɹɔ ǝɹǝʍ ʎǝɥʇ ʞuıɥʇ oʇ ɹɐǝddɐ ʇ,upıp ǝɥs ǝsnɐɔǝq 'ʇı ʇnoqɐ pɹıǝʍ ʎןןɐǝɹ sɐʍ ǝɥs ʇnq 'ʎɐʍ ʎdǝǝɹɔ ɐ uı pɹɐɥ ɹǝdns ɹǝɥ uo buıʇʇıɥ uǝǝq pɐɥ sʎnb 2 ʇɐɥʇ pıɐs osןɐ ǝɥs ˙ɹɐǝɥ oʇ pɹıǝʍ ʎןןɐǝɹ sɐʍ ɥɔıɥʍ˙˙˙puǝıɹɟ "ʇsǝq" ʎɯ ʞɔnɟ ʎןןɐʇoʇ pןnoʍ ǝɥs ʇɐɥʇ sǝɯıʇ ןɐɹǝʌǝs uı ʍǝɹɥʇ puɐ 'ʇuǝʍ pɐɥ ʇɥbıu ǝɥʇ ʍoɥ ʇnoqɐ ǝɯ pןoʇ ǝɥs ˙pɹıǝʍ ןןɐ uǝǝq pɐɥ ʇı puɐ 'ʎɐpɹǝʇsǝʎ ɹɐq ɐ ʇɐ ɟb sıɥ puɐ puǝıɹɟ "ʇsǝq" ʎɯ ʇǝɯ pɐɥ ʎǝɥʇ ʎןʇuǝɹɐddɐ puɐ 'buıʇʇɐɥɔ ʇɹɐʇs ʇsnظ sı op ǝʍ buıɥʇ ʇsɹıɟ ǝɥʇ
˙ǝɹǝɥʇ ɹǝɥ ɥʇıʍ buıs ʇou pןnoʍ ǝɥs pǝʇsısuı xǝ ʎɯ ʇnq 'ɯooɹ ɹǝɥ uı ǝq pןnoʍ ɹǝʇsıs ʎɯ puɐ sʎɐʍʎuɐ ןooɔ ʎןןɐʇoʇ ǝq pןnoʍ ʇı pıɐs ı ˙sןɐɔoʌ uo s,ǝɥs - ʇıq ɐ ǝɔıʇɔɐɹd oʇ pǝʇuɐʍ ǝɥs puɐ 'ɹǝɥʇǝboʇ puɐq ɐ buıʇɹɐʇs ǝɹɐ ı puɐ ɹǝɥ ǝsnɐɔǝq 'ɹǝʌo buıʎɐʇs sɐʍ ɹǝʇsıs ʎɯ ʇno punoɟ ǝɥs uǝɥʍ pǝʎouuɐ ʇob osןɐ ǝɥs ˙ʎɐʍ ɟןɐɥ ɹǝɥ ʇǝǝɯ p,ı pıɐs pɐɥ ı ǝɔuıs 'ǝɔɐןd ɹǝɥ oʇ ɹǝsoןɔ ɹǝɥ ʇǝɯ ʇ,upɐɥ ı ʇɐɥʇ pǝʎouuɐ s,ǝɥs ʇɐɥʇ sı suǝddɐɥ ʇɐɥʇ buıɥʇ ʇsɹıɟ ǝɥʇ puɐ 'ɹǝɥ ʇǝǝɯ puɐ ǝpısʇno ob ı ɯd8 punoɹɐ ʇɐ 'sʎɐʍʎuɐ
˙ɔʇǝ ɹǝʌobunɥ ʎןןɐǝɹ sɐʍ ǝɥs pǝuoıʇuǝɯ ǝɥs puɐ 'ǝɹns pıɐs ı ˙ɹǝʇɐן ɹǝʌo ǝɯɐɔ ǝqʎɐɯ ǝɥs ɟı ʞo ǝq pןnoʍ ʇı ɟı pǝʞsɐ ǝɥs puɐ 'ʇıɥs ǝɥʇ buıʇooɥs pǝʇɹɐʇs ǝʍ puɐ ʎɐpoʇ ɹǝıןɹɐǝ ʞooqǝɔɐɟ uo dn ǝɯ ʇıɥ ǝɥs ˙ɹǝɥ ɥʇıʍ ʎʇɹɐd ɐ oʇ ob oʇ ɹǝɟɟo uɐ pǝuıןɔǝp ı ʎɐpɹǝʇsǝʎ os
Bit of a five-head
but I'd cram until dead
Is that one of the Tilley girls? Meg or Jennifer?
looks older than forty-four
but she can still be my lil _____ .
Hell if I know.