WTF Fender Bender with Millennial Today (God help us)

Discussion in 'The Howard Stern Show' started by ChimneySweep, Sep 7, 2016.

  1. ChimneySweep

    ChimneySweep Well-Known Member

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    OK, so on lunch break today, I am going up a road in front of a shopping center and just as I approach the intersection the light turns yellow, so I keep going (PLENTY of time and I am traveling probably 30-35 mph). As soon as I enter the intersection this on-coming car turns RIGHT into my path. I'm like "WTF???" hit the gas and swerve and she side-swipes the rear quarter panel. I go up to the next entrance and pull around to the parking lot. The other car comes from the other way (where the accident occurred) and we park.

    I get out and see these two young Asian girls (CA plates and we are in the midwest). The passenger who is some 20-ish know-it-all Asian little bitch gets out as I look at my damage and starts to say shit to me before I can even open my mouth. Now, I am a reasonable guy and have NO DOUBT that she is in the wrong here because I had the clear right-of-way and even if the light was yellow or whatever and she still has to yield to me. She starts saying shit about how I should have stopped and what they "thought" I was going to do, etc and I can feel my blood pressure start to rise instantly. I tell her "look, I had the right of way and your friend ran right the fuck into me...had I NOT sped up and swerved she'd have t-boned me and it might have been much worse". She starts getting all huffy and puffy and telling me to "listen" to her. I ask if she's calling the cops or should I? She is starting to explain to me about how if a light is yellow, blah, blah, blah (not realizing her friend was obviously running right through a yellow in order to hit me)...I explain to her that I was fully in the intersection and did not run any red light or anything like that and hadn't broken any laws so she is simply fucking wrong.

    She keeps disagreeing and so I start yelling at her to STFU because whether she likes it or not there are laws of the road and she is wrong and she is still saying the thought I was turning (I had no blinker on and wasn't even though that is irrelevant anyway), then she says she thought I was going to stop (I made no indication that I was stopping and also irrelevant). So then she goes full millennial and starts saying that I "should apologize too". I tell her that if I had done something wrong I would...she keeps telling me how I "should have" done this or that and I remind her again I don't give a shit and that what she "thinks" or "thought" have absolutely nothing to do with reality or who is right or wrong. I am right and she is wrong and her friend is responsible here not me.

    Then she starts telling me to stop "yelling" and saying she "can't talk to someone who is unreasonable". I told her that to her pea brain I am sure anyone who disagrees with her even when they are correct is "unreasonable". Then she starts trying to give me a driving lesson and says she took the test more recently that I did (since I am obviously much older) like I don't now what I am talking about and I tell her the rules of right-of-way haven't changed. I mention the Cali plates and ask her if she's ever drivin' around here and explained that I have been driving around this city (and used to live in this exact area for several years) for 30 years now. She told me not to "point at her" and I said (pointing at her with all fingers and then in every other direction) that I can point at whatever the fuck I want to point at.

    She was melting down and told me to get back in my car because "she didn't want to talk to me any more" like a sassy little fucking brat. I told her to fuck off and I'll stand right here and wait for the cops (who I had called). I also told her that I didn't have anything to say since she was probably retarded and then told her that is still a real word and to look it up if she didn't believe me. She gets on her phone and starts making some calls like she is calling some high-powered attorney, bwahahahaha. I told her she was going to cry when she found out how wrong she was. She snapped "why would I cry about it?" and I told her because she seemed like no one had ever told her before.

    So the cop arrived and I told him my version and then she told hers (her poor friend, the driver, was really quiet and I kind of felt sorry for her). I got back to work and called my insurance company. The agent said since there were no tickets issued *to me at least, cop was still talking to her when I left* and based on the intersection and where the damage on our cars were that I would have no liability at all (of course) and we set up a time for an estimate for the repairs at my convenience. Damn I wish I could see that angry little Asian face right down, dumb ass idiot kid.

    I swear if this had been a Hollywood movie I would have been the angry old white dude yelling at the "reasonable" young millennial SJW-type. What a fucking idiot. A generation lost.

    I know, cool story, bro.

    [​IMG]
     
  2. Quality Control

    Quality Control dove Gold

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  3. Mark Mayonnaise

    Mark Mayonnaise You look like a tree! VIP

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  4. VarmintSam

    VarmintSam Well-Known Member VIP Gold

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    Just tell the cops the earth is flat. Works like a charm.
     
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  5. ChimneySweep

    ChimneySweep Well-Known Member

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    Cop was a flat-earther. I could tell by the secret handshake he gave me and the knowing "white guy" nod.

    She was still wrong anyway.
     
  6. BrulesRules

    BrulesRules Just grab 'em in the biscuits Gold

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    was she hot?
     
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  7. ice cream

    ice cream Well-Known Member

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    most likely another fatherless girl due to divorce :coffee:
     
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  8. ChimneySweep

    ChimneySweep Well-Known Member

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    maybe back when I was in high school, but no...not really. The driver less so, but at least she kept her trap shut. But who knew they couldn't drive worth a fuck?

    [​IMG]
     
  9. bootyclause

    bootyclause Well-Known Member

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    she sounds so god damned horny.

    [​IMG]
     
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  10. Rockside7

    Rockside7 VIP Extreme Gold

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    Just, if it was a Hollywood movie?
     
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  11. SorryBoff

    SorryBoff Well-Known Member

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    It was an Asian chick and you have the word "yellow" peppered all through there.

    Darn you and your subconscious micro aggressions. :cuss:
     
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  12. Coke Can Baby

    Coke Can Baby Don't be a skunk Gold

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    Certainly breaking no stereotypes here
     
  13. DrivenByDemons

    DrivenByDemons Spinoff Jesus Staff Member

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    So many words.
     
  14. yaddc

    yaddc Well-Known Member

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    Did you leave anything out. Fucking thing was 20 minutes long.
     
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  15. hugh jasol

    hugh jasol white trash on dope Gold

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    image.png
     
  16. icypussy

    icypussy clit finder Gold

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  17. Gretsch Man

    Gretsch Man Well-Known Member

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    Triggered.
     
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  18. Calloused Shins

    Calloused Shins Well-Known Member

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    fuck man. Great story.
     
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  19. Mlaw

    Mlaw Quite Contrarian Gold

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    why were you even speaking to the the passenger?
     
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  20. Hugh Blowmont

    Hugh Blowmont Just be funny

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    Jesus, tell us more. You tell the story like a fucking milennial broad.

    Tell it like a man:

    1. Chink broad hit you.
    2. She was a bitch.
    3. You told her what's what.
    4. Cop backed you up.

    There, was that so fucking hard?...