Finally the Phish article we've all been waiting for

Discussion in 'The Bar' started by Chriza, Jun 11, 2016.

  1. Chriza

    Chriza Well-Known Member

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  2. scrambler

    scrambler Well-Known Member 2010 OG

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    Not clicking, did they break up?
     
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  3. Rubber Biscuit

    Rubber Biscuit Well-Known Member Banned User

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    "All Members of the Band Phish Killed in Massive Nerve Gas Attack"

    ^^ This is the article I've been waiting for.
     
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  4. Chriza

    Chriza Well-Known Member

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    No. It's just an amusing piece about all the reasons they blow goats.
     
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  5. Daveindiego

    Daveindiego Confirmed Internet Legend Banned User

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    PHISH FANS ARE PIECES OF HUMAN GARBAGE

    The caliber of Phish's fan base is a classic, time-honored reason to hate the band as much as the Khmer Rouge. Phish fans are basically dead-eyed jocks that are too drugged-up to rape. They're often referred to as "Wookies," a reference to the slack-jawed, non-verbal state they perennially exist in following consumption of olympic amounts of lysergic acid diethylamide. Most of these people are harmless enough, if you consider the vegetarian, cross-dressing sons of chemical biologists with names like "Murph-nugget" harmless.

    [​IMG]
    Wookie.

    Some Phish Heads admit to "getting into one Tool album in college," but ultimately write their pre-Phish days off as "a weird time in my life" while gawking at a table of neatly organized bubblers, bowls, bongs, one-hitters, and vaporizers, all with ridiculous nicknames like "gussy" or "chillum-fish." They're also guilty of quoting Dr. Seuss in their AOL Instant Messenger profile (in a sea foam-green font color) and using Phish lyrics for both their email account name and email password. Which brings me to my next point...

    :lol:
     
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  6. Daveindiego

    Daveindiego Confirmed Internet Legend Banned User

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  7. Daveindiego

    Daveindiego Confirmed Internet Legend Banned User

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    http://noisey.vice.com/blog/what-happens-when-you-make-fun-of-phish-on-the-internet


    This Is What Happens When You Make Fun Of Phish On The Internet

    By Benjamin Shapiro

    [​IMG]15 points on reddit



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    Phish singer Trey Anastasio "phlipping the bird."

    A few hours ago I published a story on Noisey called Phish Has Been a Band for 30 Thirty Years Now and They Have Sucked the Whole Time. While this wasn't exactly James Agee-caliber hard-hitting journalism, I thought I had a few choice zingers in there to describe Phish fans, especially phrases like "stoner Wookie trash," "fumbling, intolerable dickweeds," and, that old classic, "human garbage."

    What I didn't realize was that the entire Phinternet would lock arms, steel themselves, and charge at me like a pack of wild, weed-crazed doom wargs. Since I published the article, I've felt like Edward The First in Braveheart. I've literally had to shut off my phone to avoid the avalanches of Tweets and emails from these hippy scumbags.

    Now it's 4PM, and a few things have happened that I'd like to share with you all, if for no other reason than to hold a mirror up to Phish fans and show the world what a bunch of total dicks these guys are.



    1. PHISH FANS ARE MAKING HATE ART ABOUT ME

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    2. SOMEONE IS MAKING HATE SHIRTS ABOUT ME

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    3. I HAVE RECEIVED HUNDREDS OF HATE-FILLED TWEETS

    [​IMG]
     
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  8. Chriza

    Chriza Well-Known Member

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    What up, @LazyLightning55 ! :cheer:
     
  9. Daveindiego

    Daveindiego Confirmed Internet Legend Banned User

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    Guy totally has my style too.
     
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  10. Capn Crud

    Capn Crud The pride of Cucamonga VIP

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    How b about some Tweezer while you read that :)
     
  11. RH Goatcabin

    RH Goatcabin One Man Four Banner Mafia 2010 OG POTY The Bar VIP Gold

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    We good bro? :hole:
     
  12. Capn Crud

    Capn Crud The pride of Cucamonga VIP

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  13. Rubber Biscuit

    Rubber Biscuit Well-Known Member Banned User

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    You are the same loser phish fan. Its you. Defending a pedo band.
     
  14. Chriza

    Chriza Well-Known Member

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  15. Chigs

    Chigs Above the Waves VIP

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    This poor bastard is clearly a noob, and is butthurt that he cant find his Pavs to SPAC...sorry , loser;keep on keepin' on.
     
  16. Chigs

    Chigs Above the Waves VIP

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    I feel like you didnt give the best representation of 3.0 tweezer, but other than that, Im okay. Thanks for asking: it has been a tumultuous thread to read

     
  17. Chriza

    Chriza Well-Known Member

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    [​IMG]
     
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