Stern Show Funniest Jackie Joke ?

Discussion in 'The Howard Stern Show' started by Getthepoisonout, Oct 2, 2016.

  1. Getthepoisonout

    Getthepoisonout I regret my username

    Reputations:
    52,421
    Joined:
    Jun 14, 2012
    Messages:
    2,773
    Likes Received:
    6,079
    I really like "Why are there no Pueto Ricans on Star Treck"

     
  2. Shivvy

    Shivvy 100k Post Club

    Reputations:
    238,067
    Joined:
    May 23, 2011
    Messages:
    124,183
    Likes Received:
    45,097
    Give Rodney a chance
     
    grendelxii, joemama, ApeFace and 24 others like this.
  3. A Succulent Chinese Meal

    A Succulent Chinese Meal Oh, that's a nice headlock, sir. VIP

    Reputations:
    213,658
    Joined:
    Aug 31, 2010
    Messages:
    49,749
    Likes Received:
    23,825
    All time favorite is "What's black and sits at the top of the stairs? Christopher Reeve in a house fire." I don't know why.
     
  4. Shivvy

    Shivvy 100k Post Club

    Reputations:
    238,067
    Joined:
    May 23, 2011
    Messages:
    124,183
    Likes Received:
    45,097
    :lol:
     
  5. The Finklestein Kid

    The Finklestein Kid Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    10,188
    Joined:
    Sep 3, 2015
    Messages:
    1,579
    Likes Received:
    1,699
    Give Rodney another chance.
     
  6. No. 2 Pencil

    No. 2 Pencil "Shit Mult" VIP

    Reputations:
    33,884
    Joined:
    Sep 6, 2016
    Messages:
    2,150
    Likes Received:
    4,665
    The funniest was the last time he held out for contract negotiations.

    :cwl:
     
  7. nun puncher

    nun puncher Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    5,773
    Joined:
    Feb 29, 2016
    Messages:
    1,132
    Likes Received:
    1,032
    Why can't Stevie wonder read is my favorite
     
    God and DiamondGoddess like this.
  8. JerseySlim

    JerseySlim Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    10,106
    Joined:
    Sep 22, 2015
    Messages:
    922
    Likes Received:
    2,657
    "I deserve more money"
     
  9. The Bloody Nine

    The Bloody Nine VIP Extreme Gold

    Reputations:
    30,556
    Joined:
    Jul 27, 2013
    Messages:
    928
    Likes Received:
    2,208
    Good one Wigward, you got to keep 20 extra million dollars to go on top of your other 400 MM and not be spent and the fans got an unfunny PC POS show!
     
  10. ScottBaiosPenis

    ScottBaiosPenis Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    77,551
    Joined:
    May 26, 2013
    Messages:
    8,975
    Likes Received:
    15,458
    When martha rae died and he said they should send a bouquet of pansies to mark harris with the card reading "our condolences, you fag"
     
  11. ScottBaiosPenis

    ScottBaiosPenis Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    77,551
    Joined:
    May 26, 2013
    Messages:
    8,975
    Likes Received:
    15,458
    Jackie was so fast that's kinda why no one could replace him doing the lines. I really can't comprehend how he could be that drunk and still that on the ball
     
  12. FeetToTaste

    FeetToTaste Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    32,267
    Joined:
    Jan 13, 2014
    Messages:
    3,469
    Likes Received:
    6,852
    There's a middle age divorcee. She's always wanted to sleep with a black guy. She's dying to sleep with a black guy.

    Finally one night she brings a black guy home, takes off all her clothes, spreads her legs and says "alright buddy, do what you do best!"

    So he grabs her TV and runs out the door.

    Come on, that's killer shit.

    [​IMG]
     
    wr118, Cookie_Puss, GCD1 and 31 others like this.
  13. DogStar69

    DogStar69 Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    -132,548
    Joined:
    Sep 22, 2010
    Messages:
    29,076
    Likes Received:
    15,925
    His funnies joke was when he said he paid back Rodney Dangerfield's loan in jokes.
     
  14. FeetToTaste

    FeetToTaste Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    32,267
    Joined:
    Jan 13, 2014
    Messages:
    3,469
    Likes Received:
    6,852
    What's the difference between OJ Simpson and The Lion King?

    One is a lyin' African and one is an African lion.

    :haha:
     
  15. Gogol Boobdello

    Gogol Boobdello Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    58,054
    Joined:
    Feb 16, 2012
    Messages:
    8,441
    Likes Received:
    8,104
    A lady gets out of the bath, slips on the bathroom tiles, does the splits and gets stuck to the bathroom floor with the Suction. Her husband can't get her up so he calls for the plumber.

    He comes in with a tile cutter and starts cutting around the bathroom tile. The husband says you can't do that. Those tiles are Halton tiles and cost $60 each.

    So the plumber unzips his fly and starts playing with himself.

    Her husband says "This is my wife, what do you think you 're doing ".

    The plumber says "l'm going to get her excited, Slide her into the kitchen and take a tile up in there, they're only $1.99 each".
     
  16. FeetToTaste

    FeetToTaste Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    32,267
    Joined:
    Jan 13, 2014
    Messages:
    3,469
    Likes Received:
    6,852
    What's the difference between a strip club and a circus?

    One has a cunning bunch of stunts.

    [​IMG]
     
  17. jokeland

    jokeland Well-Known Member VIP

    Reputations:
    6,053
    Joined:
    Dec 19, 2011
    Messages:
    5,238
    Likes Received:
    3,292
    Jackie had to be a pretty bright guy to have graduated with an engineering degree from Michigan state. I wonder why a guy with options would enter some crappy business like stand up
     
  18. yaddc

    yaddc Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    104,082
    Joined:
    Jan 13, 2014
    Messages:
    23,211
    Likes Received:
    20,772
    Guy did pretty good he was making 800/900 tho while on the show at least towards the end. Whats a engineering degree making.
     
    Ta Ta Toothy likes this.
  19. yaddc

    yaddc Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    104,082
    Joined:
    Jan 13, 2014
    Messages:
    23,211
    Likes Received:
    20,772
    Give rodney a second kannnnnnnnnnnnce
     
  20. No. 2 Pencil

    No. 2 Pencil "Shit Mult" VIP

    Reputations:
    33,884
    Joined:
    Sep 6, 2016
    Messages:
    2,150
    Likes Received:
    4,665
    One time he said something like, "she sat on my hand and it felt like a horse eating out of my Palm."

    That cracks me up.