Remember the Gary story where he worked at some store where the owner had a button he'd press that would cause a buzzer to sound every time a black walked into the store? I'm looking for funny stories from work. Here's one of mine: I worked as a cashier at a grocery as a kid. We had all kinds of baggers but this store had a LOT of elderly baggers. There was this one old white guy, Archie, who would walk the groceries out for the customer, grab a gulp of hooch from his old-ass Nova, and come back in. After a few hours of this, the guy would be shit-hammered. Anyways, I'm checking out this attractive French chick. Archie is bagging for me. She has probably 20 items. I'm checking stuff out on the machine and then check out a large box of Cheerios. It's heavier than normal, I ring it up anyways (I don't really give a shit to investigate), fling it down the conveyor to Archie and out whips a loaf of some pricey, organic, fair-trade-or-some-shit, bread from the box of Cheerios. Archie picks up the empty box and peers at the loaf of bread and says, "what the hell are those idiots doing back there? Those aren't Cheerios!" He's thinking the stock-guys are fucking with the cereals or something. The chick is, in her suddenly very thick French accent, saying, "I don't understand! I don't want that!!!", and looks at me with tears in her eyes probably thinking I'm going to call the cops. Again, I don't really give a shit. Archie starts apologizing to the girl, slurring something like, "I'll go back and get you a real box of cereal. I'm sorry but we have some real idiots back their screwing with the inventory." She declined, I rang up the rest of her order, asked if she wanted the bread ("no"), and never saw her in the store again.