Discussion in 'The Bar' started by SiriusDawg, Apr 24, 2012.
don't do it
Is this Kellyg?
...this is sage advice. +1.
Why buy the cow, when you can fuck the cow for free?
this is the right vibe :yesshake:
Ask for a pre nup
Don't do it.
This. But if you do it, then drink heavily and don't stop until you die.
I read this somewhere, never got a chance to try it, but it may work for you:
First night of the honeymoon, beat the shit out of her. She won't want to run home to mommy that quick, and will be healed up by the time you get home. After that, you will probably only have to raise your hand to keep her in line.
Other than that, hide assets. Gold coins, cash in a jar in the garage.
Always set your browser to delete cookies and history when you log off.
Get a small concealable falsh drive for holding on to your favorite porn.
Get a bobo email for contacting hookers.
Never tell her she's getting fat. Once she stops having sex with you, you'll know that she knows she's fat.
Never let her smell your dick when you get home from a night out with the boys.
Baby wipes take glitter make up off your clothes.
cherish one another, and munch out her box even if she's on her period.
hard to post after "wife is a whore"
if you want to go a different way, however, consider the following: both of you get in agreement on the three C's
Cash - joint account? prenup? separate bank accounts (never recommend this, btw)? savings? big purchases? spending limit? budget? veto power? who works (better at least be the man working)?
Children - yes? no? how many? what genders? when? raised by mom? raised by nanny? raised by the State? raised by inlaws? latch key kids?
Clan - family. how far away do you have to move to get away from them? or do you have to stay by them? or with them? what holidays do you spend where? with whom?
if the two of you are in agreement on all three of these key issues, you will still have problems.
Jesus, kid, I don't know what to tell you. Other than my kids, it aint worth it.
OK I just thought of something. Make a contract. Every five years you have to both agree to stay married. It will force you to face your problems. If you both don't agree, poof, divorce. I'll let you work out the details but that's a great idea.
if you're not over 25 years old, OP, just wait until you are. if she's the one, nothing lost. if she isn't, a whole buttload of hell saved
Real and I are getting married next year. If you guys give him this kind of "helpful" advice before our wedding, I will hurt you.