Going to do Benjy Footloose Speech at Wedding

Discussion in 'The Howard Stern Show' started by Ashbeard, Aug 18, 2013.

  1. Ashbeard

    Ashbeard Well-Known Member

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    So I have to make a speech at my buddies wedding and I'm thinking of just getting up and doing the Footloose speech exactly how it is in the movie.

    This is a real laid back wedding and there will be a lot of jokeing around. She is a stand up comedian and everyone will make funny speeches mostly.

    Also I'm lazy and I don't want to write a speech and jokes.

    Funny or Not?
     
  2. HowardsNeckFlap

    HowardsNeckFlap New Member Banned User

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    you're gonna bomb so hard
     
  3. HowardsNeckFlap

    HowardsNeckFlap New Member Banned User

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    i cant wait to see this fail
     
  4. HowardsNeckFlap

    HowardsNeckFlap New Member Banned User

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    please do it please
     
  5. HowardsNeckFlap

    HowardsNeckFlap New Member Banned User

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    who in their right mind would want to replicate benjy
     
  6. Groucho Marx

    Groucho Marx Well-Known Member

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    Do it, but make sure we can watch the video of it afterward.
     
  7. Ashbeard

    Ashbeard Well-Known Member

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    I think with this group of people bombing will be pretty funny. I'm just going to soldier through it including the actions with slamming down the bible.

    I just wonder if anyone will figure out its the footloose speech.
     
  8. knu3421

    knu3421 Well-Known Member

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    Turn off his mic
     
  9. HowardsNeckFlap

    HowardsNeckFlap New Member Banned User

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    only funny thing benjy thing has ever done

    [video=youtube;CdTmGVJMsls]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CdTmGVJMsls[/video]
     
  10. Ashbeard

    Ashbeard Well-Known Member

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    Also, I'm not even a Benjy fan but I did think standing up at that meeting was funny and the video made me laugh.

    My wife thought me doing the Ren speech is going to be funny.

    Im a good public speaker and I'm known for good wedding speeches so I think I can pull this off.
     
  11. Ashbeard

    Ashbeard Well-Known Member

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    If everyone was just confused after I would still call it a success
     
  12. SouthernListen

    SouthernListen I don't follow the crowd. Sorry about that. VIP

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    Comedy is best left to comedians.
     
  13. Ruffypup

    Ruffypup Well-Known Member

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    What did David do? What did David do? What did David do? :grad:
     
  14. Ashbeard

    Ashbeard Well-Known Member

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    He fucking danced with all his might!
     
  15. Ashbeard

    Ashbeard Well-Known Member

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    Any suggestions for a funnier speech I should use? Maybe Pachino's every inch football speech?
     
  16. Groucho Marx

    Groucho Marx Well-Known Member

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    You could do the Braveheart speech about freedom since your buddy is about to lose his.
     
  17. joyceface

    joyceface Queen of Everything VIP

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    Dodally DAWESOMMMME! make sure to get videos!
     
  18. Ruffypup

    Ruffypup Well-Known Member

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    I'd like to tell you about a guy I know, a friend of mine. His name is Brian Piccolo. And he has the heart of a giant, and that rare form of courage that allows him to kid himself and his opponent, cancer. He has a mental attitude that makes me proud to have a friend who spells out the world 'courage,' 24 hours a day, every day of his life. Now you honor me by giving me this award. But I say to you here now Brian Piccolo is the man who deserves the George S. Halas award. It is mine tonight... and Brian Piccolo's tomorrow.I love Brian Piccolo. And I'd like all of you to love him too. And so tonight, when you hit your knees, please ask God to love him.
     
  19. Ashbeard

    Ashbeard Well-Known Member

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    I would love to post video as my wife will be taping but would never put my self out to the wolves here at Dawgs. You guys would make fun of my long hair, red beard.....I've said too much...
     
  20. Ashbeard

    Ashbeard Well-Known Member

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    I could morph this into a wedding speech. I played football with a lot of them and we used to listen to this before big games. Kinda lame and cliché I know.

    " I don't know what to say, really. Three minutes to the biggest battle of our professional lives. All comes down to today, and either, we heal as a team, or we're gonna crumble. Inch by inch, play by play. Until we're finished. We're in hell right now, gentlemen. Believe me. And, we can stay here, get the shit kicked out of us, or we can fight our way back into the light. We can climb outta hell... one inch at a time. Now I can't do it for ya, I'm too old. I look around, I see these young faces and I think, I mean, I've made every wrong choice a middle-aged man can make. I, uh, I've pissed away all my money, believe it or not. I chased off anyone who's ever loved me. And lately, I can't even stand the face I see in the mirror. You know, when you get old, in life, things get taken from you. I mean, that's... that's... that's a part of life. But, you only learn that when you start losin' stuff. You find out life's this game of inches, so is football. Because in either game - life or football - the margin for error is so small. I mean, one half a step too late or too early and you don't quite make it. One half second too slow, too fast and you don't quite catch it. The inches we need are everywhere around us. They're in every break of the game, every minute, every second. On this team we fight for that inch. On this team we tear ourselves and everyone else around us to pieces for that inch. We claw with our fingernails for that inch. Because we know when add up all those inches, that's gonna make the fucking difference between winning and losing! Between living and dying! I'll tell you this, in any fight it's the guy whose willing to die whose gonna win that inch. And I know, if I'm gonna have any life anymore it's because I'm still willing to fight and die for that inch, because that's what living is, the six inches in front of your face. Now I can't make you do it. You've got to look at the guy next to you, look into his eyes. Now I think ya going to see a guy who will go that inch with you. Your gonna see a guy who will sacrifice himself for this team, because he knows when it comes down to it your gonna do the same for him. That's a team, gentlemen, and either, we heal, now, as a team, or we will die as individuals. That's football guys, that's all it is. Now, what are you gonna do? "