WTF Good News Canadians, You Can Suck All The Moose Cock You Want... For Now...

Discussion in 'The Howard Stern Show' started by BrerJimmy, Jun 9, 2016.

  1. BrerJimmy

    BrerJimmy Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    52,645
    Joined:
    Jan 15, 2012
    Messages:
    8,062
    Likes Received:
    10,072
    [​IMG]
    CRIME & DRUGS

    Canada's Top Court Ruled That Oral Sex With Animals Is Technically Legal – For Now
    By Justin Ling
    June 9, 2016 | 10:45 am

    In a surprising decision from Canada's Supreme Court, the country's top judges ruled that forcing a dog to perform oral sex is not, in fact, bestiality and therefore not necessarily illegal.

    The ruling essentially invites Parliament to get to work and fix that.

    The case before the court involves an unnamed man, accused of forcing the family dog to perform oral sex on his underage daughter. The man was convicted of a litany of sexual offences in relation to the abuse, and sentenced to 14 years in jail. On one charge of bestiality, however, he was acquitted on appeal.

    His case was surprisingly complex. His lawyers contended that Parliament had never intended to criminalize oral sex with animals. Instead, they argued before the court, the charge, which carries no formal definition in the Criminal Code, was linked to 'buggery' — a similar charge also criminalized homosexual acts — and therefore required penetration.

    The Government of Canada, as well as Animal Justice — an animal rights group — argued that the court ought to take a common sense approach to the law and naturally consider any sexual contact with animals as wrong, abusive, and illegal.

    They managed to convince one judge.

    "Acts with animals that have a sexual purpose are inherently exploitative whether or not penetration occurs," wrote Justice Rosalie Abella in a dissenting opinion, adding that preventing exploitation is what Canada's laws "were all about."

    The majority court, however, ruled that if Parliament had wanted to criminalize oral sex with animals, it would have — and, in so doing, it wouldn't have used the word 'buggery.'

    "When Parliament uses a term with a legal meaning, it generally intends the term to be given that meaning," the majority court wrote.

    While the court upheld the man's acquittal, it did, however, nudge the government towards taking action to fix the legislative gap.

    "Any expansion of criminal liability for this offence is within Parliament's exclusive domain," they wrote.

    And one member of Parliament was quick to accept the invitation.

    Nathaniel Erskine-Smith, a backbench MP with the governing Liberal Party, introduced C-246, which would explicitly ban all sexual activity between man and animal.

    The legislation would also add a host of other legal protections for animals.
     
    lilbuddy67 likes this.
  2. Anfkid

    Anfkid Blue Banner Mafia Staff Member

    Reputations:
    452,646
    Joined:
    Feb 18, 2012
    Messages:
    65,379
    Likes Received:
    64,538
  3. bobblebooey

    bobblebooey Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    50,118
    Joined:
    Jan 20, 2012
    Messages:
    2,042
    Likes Received:
    6,640
  4. Walygatr

    Walygatr Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    93,199
    Joined:
    Dec 13, 2011
    Messages:
    7,155
    Likes Received:
    20,819
    [​IMG]
     
    jcice likes this.
  5. captbill

    captbill Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    10,730
    Joined:
    Aug 14, 2013
    Messages:
    2,136
    Likes Received:
    2,353
    If a law is passed outlawing sex with animals, does that mean no sex "doggie style"?
     
  6. wife is a whore

    wife is a whore Stripped of POTY for butthurting staff VIP

    Reputations:
    576,467
    Joined:
    Jan 15, 2012
    Messages:
    47,580
    Likes Received:
    81,009
    @Slippy

    No need for dating, just get a pet.
     
    meanredhed likes this.
  7. BrerJimmy

    BrerJimmy Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    52,645
    Joined:
    Jan 15, 2012
    Messages:
    8,062
    Likes Received:
    10,072
    Definitely crushes the interracial porn industry.
     
    KDK12 likes this.
  8. binhphuocngu

    binhphuocngu Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    16,715
    Joined:
    Feb 1, 2014
    Messages:
    2,084
    Likes Received:
    3,930
    Thafuck?!? Too many pucks to someones head?
     
    IfTheyOnlyKnew likes this.
  9. HowieHasBeen

    HowieHasBeen VIP Extreme Gold

    Reputations:
    30,763
    Joined:
    Jan 17, 2012
    Messages:
    4,084
    Likes Received:
    6,477
    Only in Canada.
     
  10. Ashbeard

    Ashbeard Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    13,900
    Joined:
    May 5, 2013
    Messages:
    2,216
    Likes Received:
    3,421
    This is what our supreme court is spending time on?


    Thanks Trudeau.
     
    HowieStearn, jcice and meanredhed like this.
  11. DTF296

    DTF296 Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    109,071
    Joined:
    Jan 13, 2014
    Messages:
    716
    Likes Received:
    1,866
    [​IMG]
     
    Dave Jones, Slow and ripley1 like this.
  12. CrucifiedAGT

    CrucifiedAGT He's Around VIP

    Reputations:
    360,105
    Joined:
    Nov 23, 2013
    Messages:
    12,294
    Likes Received:
    27,035
    Gays, Trannys, Animals........

    Welcome to the NWO where anything that doesn't produce offspring is the new normal.

    :cheer:
     
    KDK12, Rabid Dogman and ShutUpSitDown like this.
  13. PSU Shower Room

    PSU Shower Room Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    43,188
    Joined:
    Jul 4, 2012
    Messages:
    4,049
    Likes Received:
    9,877
    This is perfectly fine, but don't offend 2 lesbians in a comedy club.
     
  14. Rum Balls

    Rum Balls VIP Extreme Gold

    Reputations:
    145,548
    Joined:
    Aug 11, 2014
    Messages:
    23,912
    Likes Received:
    15,905
  15. Sleep

    Sleep Goon Squad DawgShed News

    Reputations:
    184,479
    Joined:
    Feb 17, 2012
    Messages:
    26,959
    Likes Received:
    24,321
    Uhhh, WTfuck, man?
     
  16. EddyG

    EddyG Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    9,557
    Joined:
    Jan 10, 2012
    Messages:
    9,843
    Likes Received:
    4,124
    great. I know a horse that has wanted to suck me off for years
     
    agnes, DABA, Slippy and 1 other person like this.
  17. Slippy

    Slippy Well-Known Member VIP

    Reputations:
    27,753
    Joined:
    Nov 19, 2010
    Messages:
    34,621
    Likes Received:
    3,594
    :yes:
     
  18. larryluncg

    larryluncg Empty VIP

    Reputations:
    19,398
    Joined:
    Jun 28, 2012
    Messages:
    11,545
    Likes Received:
    9,474
    Da fuq is this ruling. It's ok to have oral sex with animals :facepalm:
     
    IfTheyOnlyKnew likes this.
  19. drewjube

    drewjube Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    2,877
    Joined:
    Feb 18, 2015
    Messages:
    464
    Likes Received:
    779
    JD!
     
    DinnerSocks likes this.
  20. wife is a whore

    wife is a whore Stripped of POTY for butthurting staff VIP

    Reputations:
    576,467
    Joined:
    Jan 15, 2012
    Messages:
    47,580
    Likes Received:
    81,009

    One day i was driving around doing deliveries and thought to myself, "could I come up w/ 20-30minutes worth of funny/entertaining material on whores?" I think a solid 30 on whores would be great. Soon as some dipshit bim gets up and starts bitchin, you could so easily clown the hell outta her. "I'm sorry, I didn't know you were a professional fucker. Let me know yer Donation and Menu Items available, I got a room for after the show." "What is yer upsell for greek, honey? I took a look at yer ass when you were stompin back to yer seat and 50roses is all I'd go." And that is if any broads complained. One thing about crazy broads, only ones they hate more than men are whores.

    I also think it would be funny, because after the first couple of whore jokes, you know the audience would expect you to move on to another topic, but you just keep beating them over the head w/ whore talk. I'd probably do the act in a Lucha mask, to save my family from the shame.