You left me with a team in shambles, just as Napoleon was left with a country in shambles. I WILL restore the Musketeers/Cockheads to their former glory.

They have automated recaps this year. Donkey Punchers (1-0) 96.92Napoleons Musketeers (0-1) 78.58 Alshon Jeffery put up 14.00 points, an upgrade on his projected 2.18, as Donkey Punchers got past Napoleons Musketeers 96.92 - 78.58. While each team hit their projections, Donkey Punchers scored 14.5% more than a projected 84.63 points to get the win. Tony Romo, with 24.48 points, brought in the third-highest score for the week. Donkey Punchers (1-0) starts the campaign in fifth place while Napoleons Musketeers (0-1) begins in 15th place. Donkey Punchers Smooth Moves Nate Kaeding, who was picked up by Donkey Punchers, scored 18.00 points against a projected 7.80, topping his projection by 130.8%. The 12.00 points scored by Rob Gronkowski was the third-highest point total among TEs in the league this week. Alshon Jeffery scored 14.00 points and beat his scoring projection by 543.4%, which led the matchup. Donkey Punchers was still able to pull out a win with only 4 of their 9 starters exceeding their projected points. Donkey Punchers got the win, overcoming both of their RBs underperforming versus their projections. Napoleons Musketeers Regret Tracker Michael Turner, who Napoleons Musketeers picked up this week, scored below his 8.31-point projection with 3.20 points. Napoleons Musketeers had no luck at the K position, losing the point battle 18.00 - 8.00 to Donkey Punchers. It was not a good week for Napoleons Musketeers at TE, where they were beaten 12.00 - 3.80. The RBs for Napoleons Musketeers got outscored 12.20 - 4.70 by the RBs for Donkey Punchers. Of the 9 starters on Napoleons Musketeers, 5 underperformed versus their projections. What If Donkey Punchers would have beaten 14 other teams besides Napoleons Musketeers this week. If Donkey Punchers had scored 17.95 more points, they would have beaten all teams in the league this week. Besides Donkey Punchers, Napoleons Musketeers would have been defeated by 12 other teams this week. If Napoleons Musketeers had scored 26.47 fewer points, they would have lost to all teams in the league this week. Game Notes Donkey Punchers covered the 8.03-point spread, winning by 18.34 points. Donkey Punchers had the fifth-highest point total in the league this week. Tony Romo performed well in the loss, ranking third in the league in scoring with 24.48 points. The New England Patriots Defense tried to help Napoleons Musketeers in the loss, beating their scoring projection by 71.7%, scoring 16.00 points versus a 9.32-point projection. Although Donkey Punchers won, they got little help from DeAngelo Williams, who only put up 0.40 points of a projected 9.61. Both teams scored more than their projected points for the week.