How Is It Possible That People Think Howard Stern Has the Best Hair In America?

Discussion in 'The Howard Stern Show' started by pilo, Feb 15, 2015.

  1. pilo

    pilo Well-Known Member

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    Has Howard put out a hit on Andrew D. Luecke yet? Comments are open

    http://www.esquire.com/style/a32570/howard-stern-voted-best-mens-hair-in-america-020415/

    Apparently the hair care professionals of America are totally insane, because groominglounge.comrecently surveyed 40 of them and they named Howard Stern holder of the best hair in America. Before you start picking up the pieces of your blown mind, we're required to let you know that "The King of All Media" beat out a top five including, Bradley Cooper in the two spot, Chris Hemsworth at number three, with Ryan Reynolds and George Clooney coming in at four and five, respectively.

    Seriously, how did this happen? If they really only asked 40 hair care professionals it seems unlikely that Stern used his considerable sway to rock the vote. Maybe SiriusXM owns groominglounge.com or something.

    Whatever, we're going to go reconsider our life choices now.
     
  2. Murcielago

    Murcielago Smoke me a kipper, I'll be back for breakfast

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    [​IMG]

    Same way most things happen.
     
  3. Shuli sucks

    Shuli sucks Well-Known Member

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    How much do you pay for your hair cut ? how about supporting the site cheapskate
     
  4. Halloween

    Halloween Well-Known Member

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    "Who the fuck reads esquire anyway, Robin? My therapist told me they're all just insanely jealous that they don't have luxurious hair like I do."
     
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  5. Rip mcdivvit

    Rip mcdivvit Well-Known Member

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    under that howard wig is a pube mess. cancer coming soon to the miserable cunt.
     
  6. God

    God Well-Known Member

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    [​IMG]
     
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  7. tired

    tired Well-Known Member

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    Stern is a cocksucker
     
  8. PelicanWig

    PelicanWig Beautiful Soup

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    Who won the previous years contests? Or were there any?
     
  9. Vashier

    Vashier VIP Extreme Gold

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    It isn't
     
  10. pilo

    pilo Well-Known Member

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    PelicanWig likes this.
  11. pilo

    pilo Well-Known Member

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    Voting by our estemmed barbers and stylists was based on a variety of criteria which Stern seemed to ace, including:

    Health: Hair that appears to be well-taken care of, soft and strong
    Versatility: Hair that allows for a variety of handsome and different looks, whether created via additional cutting or simply the application and manipulation of styling products
    Uniqueness: Hair and a style(s) that is not commonplace, yet work for the owner
    Thickness & Coverage: Basically, hair that doesn’t appear to be thinning and is free of bald patches
    Hair-To-Face Ratio: Hair that makes the man’s face appear more handsome than it otherwise would. Hair that upgrades the look of that man’s mug.



    this has to be a joke
     
  12. pilo

    pilo Well-Known Member

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    We were totally surprised that Howard won this first-ever vote. We love the guy’s show and he definitely has hair that stands out – we just never guessed our professionals would say his was the best.

    To commemorate Stern’s honor, we’ll be sending the superstar a hair-related trophy, certain to go right next to the Blockbuster Award award or Gary Puppet in his now-famous studio.

    :snipe:
     
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  13. Shuli sucks

    Shuli sucks Well-Known Member

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    Permanent curls: hair that is easy to perm
     
  14. PelicanWig

    PelicanWig Beautiful Soup

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    That award is total bullshit and the result of the wig becoming too obvious to anyone with working eyes. If Pluggy wasn't the most dumb and guilty mother fucker ever he would have just admitted he dyes his hair years ago...
     
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  15. XXXXX

    XXXXX Well-Known Member

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    Will he have to share the award with the person the hair originally came from?
     
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  16. pilo

    pilo Well-Known Member

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    towards hair looks absolutely ridiculous and makes his "mug" look like that of a grandma in denial
     
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  17. Jayla

    Jayla Ou ai-je l'esprit? Gold

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    :giggle:
     
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  18. monsoon

    monsoon Who are you with?

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    That system he wears must be a total bitch to maintain. And its expensive and time consuming. He can't wash it himself. Its a whole thing..
    You know it smells when he sweats.

    And this is really gross... When he gets a hair in his mouth...:puke:its "somebody's" hair.
    Ya know what kind of people sell their hair?

    Gross :wigtip:

    F mutt
     
  19. killallposers

    killallposers VIP Extreme Gold

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    Either someone involved with the survey threw Howard at the top of the real list as a goof or this whole thing was put together by Howard and/or Buchwald & Co. There is simply no way a true independent survey turned up these results. 0.0 chance.
     
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  20. Rip mcdivvit

    Rip mcdivvit Well-Known Member

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    I think he is trying to imply that he runs with this crew ie he and clooney an co are equals. Meanwhile he is an anorexic shock jock who ran out of steam.
     
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