HOW MOSES GOT THE 10 COMMANDMENTS

Discussion in 'The Bar' started by The Boardsman, Jun 21, 2015.

  1. The Boardsman

    The Boardsman The Conspiracy Guy VIP Gold

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    God went to the Arabs and said,
    'I have Commandments for you that will make your lives better.'
    The Arabs asked, 'What are Commandments?'
    And the Lord said, 'They are rules for living.'
    'Can you give us an example?'
    'Thou shall not kill.'
    'Not kill? We're not interested..'
    So He went to the Blacks and said, 'I have Commandments.'
    The Blacks wanted an example, and the Lord said,
    'Honour thy Father and Mother.'
    'Father? We don't know who our fathers are.
    We're not interested.'
    Then He went to the Mexicans and said,
    'I have Commandments.'
    The Mexicans also wanted an example, and the Lord said 'Thou shall not steal.'
    'Not steal?We're not interested.'
    Then He went to the French and said,
    'I have Commandments.'
    The French too wanted an example and the Lord said, 'Thou shall not commit adultery.'
    'Sacre bleu!!! Not commit adultery? We're not interested.'
    Finally, He went to the Jews and said,
    'I have Commandments..'
    'Commandments?' They said, 'How much are they?'
    'They're free.'
    'We'll take 10.'

    There. That should upset just about everybody.....
     
  2. BleedingGums

    BleedingGums Fesh Fox Faggot 2010 OG VIP

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  3. newcastlefan

    newcastlefan גֵּרְשֹׁם VIP Gold

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    I thought he went to Costco
     
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  4. doughhead63

    doughhead63 OD'd on life itself Staff Member

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    Whole lotta meh.
     
  5. wigtropolis

    wigtropolis Well-Known Member

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    Hal makes sure he violates 7 commandments everyday
     
  6. NipplesAndToes23

    NipplesAndToes23 Vice Regent to the Bar POTY VIP

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    Cutting edge comedy, folks.
     
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  7. DarkFriday

    DarkFriday Mlaw stole my AV Gold

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  8. Napoleon V

    Napoleon V Swagggggg. ! !!!!!!!! !!!!! Banned User

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    Fwd:fwd:fwd:10 Commandments Jew Joke Very Funny!!!!!
     
  9. Orgy Pants

    Orgy Pants teklife

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  10. Gomez

    Gomez VIP Extreme Gold

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    I covet dudes' wives all the time
     
  11. PullMyFinger

    PullMyFinger Hors d'oeuvre Addict 2010 OG VIP

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  12. freds

    freds . 2010 OG VIP

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    Sacre bleu!
     
  13. beatlejaws

    beatlejaws nowhere poster

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    i read somewhere that if The Ten Commandments were carved into two stone tablets they would have been too heavy to carry
     
  14. Shivvy

    Shivvy VIP Extreme Gold

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    Laws of every country are based off of those commandments
     
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  15. Joe Pesci

    Joe Pesci Well-Known Member

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  16. crazypreacher

    crazypreacher Not followin whitey's rules

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    Mops was there putting Hal's face on Moses' body carved on a stone tablet.
     
  17. A Succulent Chinese Meal

    A Succulent Chinese Meal Welcome to my underground lair.

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    The Gaystapo, believe in it.
     
  18. Capn Crud

    Capn Crud The pride of Cucamonga VIP

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    Not really.
     
  19. larryluncg

    larryluncg Birthdays were the worst days VIP Gold

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    This guy fucks vacuum cleaners. He's an RRR legend
     
  20. Daveindiego

    Daveindiego Confirmed Internet Legend Banned User

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    Can we get a little better version that this please. thank you.