HOW MOSES GOT THE 10 COMMANDMENTS

Discussion in 'The Bar' started by The Boardsman, Jun 21, 2015.

  1. The Boardsman

    The Boardsman Jedi Knight Of The Old Republic VIP

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    God went to the Arabs and said,
    'I have Commandments for you that will make your lives better.'
    The Arabs asked, 'What are Commandments?'
    And the Lord said, 'They are rules for living.'
    'Can you give us an example?'
    'Thou shall not kill.'
    'Not kill? We're not interested..'
    So He went to the Blacks and said, 'I have Commandments.'
    The Blacks wanted an example, and the Lord said,
    'Honour thy Father and Mother.'
    'Father? We don't know who our fathers are.
    We're not interested.'
    Then He went to the Mexicans and said,
    'I have Commandments.'
    The Mexicans also wanted an example, and the Lord said 'Thou shall not steal.'
    'Not steal?We're not interested.'
    Then He went to the French and said,
    'I have Commandments.'
    The French too wanted an example and the Lord said, 'Thou shall not commit adultery.'
    'Sacre bleu!!! Not commit adultery? We're not interested.'
    Finally, He went to the Jews and said,
    'I have Commandments..'
    'Commandments?' They said, 'How much are they?'
    'They're free.'
    'We'll take 10.'

    There. That should upset just about everybody.....
     
  2. BleedingGums

    BleedingGums Fesh Fox Faggot VIP

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  3. newcastlefan

    newcastlefan גֵּרְשֹׁם VIP

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    I thought he went to Costco
     
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  4. doughhead63

    doughhead63 OD'd on life itself Staff Member

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    Whole lotta meh.
     
  5. wigtropolis

    wigtropolis Well-Known Member

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    Hal makes sure he violates 7 commandments everyday
     
  6. Danas Boyfrien

    Danas Boyfrien Mediocre Negro Gold

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    Cutting edge comedy, folks.
     
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  7. DarkFriday

    DarkFriday Fired as a MOD...Twice. Gold

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  8. Napoleon V

    Napoleon V Swagggggg. ! !!!!!!!! !!!!! Banned User

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    Fwd:fwd:fwd:10 Commandments Jew Joke Very Funny!!!!!
     
  9. Orgy Pants

    Orgy Pants teklife

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  10. Gomez

    Gomez Well-Known Member

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    I covet dudes' wives all the time
     
  11. PullMyFinger

    PullMyFinger Hors d'oeuvre Addict VIP

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  12. freds

    freds . VIP

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    Sacre bleu!
     
  13. beatlejaws

    beatlejaws nowhere poster

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    i read somewhere that if The Ten Commandments were carved into two stone tablets they would have been too heavy to carry
     
  14. Shivvy

    Shivvy VIP Extreme Gold

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    Laws of every country are based off of those commandments
     
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  15. Joe Pesci

    Joe Pesci Well-Known Member

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  16. crazypreacher

    crazypreacher Maker of Lists Gold

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    Mops was there putting Hal's face on Moses' body carved on a stone tablet.
     
  17. A Succulent Chinese Meal

    A Succulent Chinese Meal What is the charge?

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    The Gaystapo, believe in it.
     
  18. Capn Crud

    Capn Crud Apply directly to the forehead VIP Gold

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    Not really.
     
  19. larryluncg

    larryluncg Empty VIP

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    This guy fucks vacuum cleaners. He's an RRR legend
     
  20. Daveindiego

    Daveindiego Confirmed Internet Legend Gold

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    Can we get a little better version that this please. thank you.