How to Become a Socialite

Discussion in 'The Howard Stern Show' started by Dlist, Jul 27, 2013.

  1. Dlist

    Dlist Well-Known Member VIP

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    How to Become a Socialite

    Do you really want to be a socialite? The socialites that we see in the media already have their wealth and status from the day they were born. More than likely you are starting from scratch. To get the know-how, don't look at Paris Hilton or Ivanka Trump. Watch Mr. Hilton and Mr. Trump and you are on your way to becoming a socialite. Well, it is hard work, but this is for those social climbers out there who want to put an impressionable foot in the door. This guide will help you get into there, the rest is up to you!

    Climbing up the social ladder and making a name for yourself


    • 1
      Create a suitable background for yourself. If you already come from a dirty rich family, consider yourself lucky in this regard.
      • When people ask you about your early life -and they will-, think of some interesting details to tell them. Avoid any embarrassing details and focus on saying positive things, even minor things can make a big difference and earn you respect.
      • Get the right education. Preparation for becoming a socialite begins in middle school. Of course, it is possible to become a socialite even if you weren't brilliant in middle and high school and didn't attend prestigious colleges, but it’s much harder

      • Learn a few foreign languages. French is a must; German, Spanish and Italian would also help. But the more languages you know, the better. However, you don't have to be completely fluent, just enough so you can have a normal conversation with someone. Even just knowing how to do hellos and goodbyes properly are ok.

    • 3
      Get an extremely well-paying job.

      (well Beth didn't do that!!)
    • 4
      Learn how to promote yourself. Make a website for yourself

    • 5
      Find someone very rich to marry. Yes, you can become a socialite by marrying the right person, without having to work for all that fortune yourself.


    Acting as a socialite


    • 1
      Choose a good name. Make sure it sounds extremely WASP-y,
    • 2
      Become interested in expensive stuff. Know all the big names in everything: fashion, art, crafts, cuisine, sports etc.
      • If you're clueless about anything luxurious, go on Fashion Net and start doing your research. The website contains some excellent links to the sites of the brands that matter. Try acquiring some stuff from any of those brands.
    • 4
      Be sophisticated. Refinement is the quality that separates ditsy celebrities from the true elite; lack of sophistication is a crime in the socialite world.
      • Have excellent manners. Tend to slouch?, put your elbows on the table while eating?, yawn without covering your mouth? Such signs of lack of good breeding are unacceptable among the socialites. Your manners must be perfect. Buy the most detailed book on having good manners you can find, then learn it by heart
      • Be classy and discrete. Avoid doing things that draw negative attention to you, such as being very loud, getting drunk at parties, flirting with everyone that crosses your path, or cursing.
      • Be fashionable. It is crucial that you have a sense of style and wear stylish, tailored clothes- and brand names make a huge difference. E

    • 5
      Travel a lot. There are some travel destinations you may not miss as a socialite- New York (obviously), Paris, London, Milan, Saint- Tropez, maybe. Take the time to visit all the important places there.

    • 6
      Be generous. The number one thing that you must do if you want to be a socialite is this- give. Yes, and you should have a few charities under your belt.

    • 7
      Socialize. After all, that's what being a socialite is all about.

      • Make friends wherever you go.
        • Better yet, befriend the right people. A little chit-chat with the local it-girl can go a long way. Having a few socialite friends will come in very handy; after all, the simplest definition of being a socialite is hanging out with other socialites.
      • Learn about event planning, and cultivate your taste in things like flowers, appetizers, music, etc. As a socialite, you'll be expected to throw some big, stylish events and parties.
      • Be photographed next to VIPs.


    Surviving in the world of the rich and famous & what not to do


      • Avoid controversy and scandals as much as possible. Do your best to keep your public image clean. No sex tapes, no drugs, no controversial divorces, no public breakdowns and scenes. Be respectable and mind your morals. Stay cool and collected even when you’re raging mad. If someone did something bad to you, find a civilized way to deal with the situation.
    • 3
      Learn to deal with malicious gossip. Some people are very mean and catty, but don’t let yourself be affected by what they say.
      • Sometimes it's better not to reveal some things from your past (only if you're 100% sure they're not going to be discovered anyway).
     
  2. Dlist

    Dlist Well-Known Member VIP

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    Know it is a long post, & I held back from posting it in blue font, obviously Beff went to wikihow.
     
  3. skytzoboy

    skytzoboy not a fuck to give

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    Why did you get your name shortened? :scratch:
     
  4. Dlist

    Dlist Well-Known Member VIP

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    B/c when I am buzzed, I have trouble logging in...usually goes something like this....Dlistcelrasudifoslkmdfms
     
  5. knu3421

    knu3421 Well-Known Member

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    Yeah WTF!! D-list only now?
     
  6. skytzoboy

    skytzoboy not a fuck to give

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    :jj:

    Going by that logic, can an admin drop the "boy" off my name? :beer:
     
  7. fuzzynuts

    fuzzynuts 99% Relevant

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    I checked remember me when I logged in the first time for that very reason.
     
  8. Dlist

    Dlist Well-Known Member VIP

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    Skytzo is still pretty complicated.:belch:
     
  9. PelicanWig

    PelicanWig Beautiful Soup

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    Wow the cunt has followed this to a tee minus the waspy name
     
  10. Dlist

    Dlist Well-Known Member VIP

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    I think the "Beautfiful Beth O" is pretty waspy
     
  11. PelicanWig

    PelicanWig Beautiful Soup

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    My bad I was talking about the "ostrosky" part
     
  12. Dlist

    Dlist Well-Known Member VIP

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    She dropped that like a hot potato.
     
  13. fuzzynuts

    fuzzynuts 99% Relevant

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    "I masturbated last night, Robin. Yeah, Beth wasn't home yet. She was at the movies with her friends."
     
  14. Dlist

    Dlist Well-Known Member VIP

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    Step Nine...Socialize!!
     
  15. Lou Cypher

    Lou Cypher New Member VIP

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    :rofl:

    Oh, you're a pisser, Dlist! If it were me, I'd be grateful for something that prevented me from logging in whilst "buzzed". You managed to outsmart your drunken self. :jj:
     
  16. Dlist

    Dlist Well-Known Member VIP

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    Am rethinking this strategy.....nobody wants to see lame "Beth is a C... :belch: posts.
     
  17. Lou Cypher

    Lou Cypher New Member VIP

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    Oh no, please don't. Everybody enjoys those posts. :beer:
     
  18. IlluminatiJones

    IlluminatiJones New Member

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    :nono:

    Last names that begin and/or end with a vowel are so QVC snow-angel-bikini new-money pig-smoochy.
     
  19. Dlist

    Dlist Well-Known Member VIP

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    :giggle:
     
  20. fuzzynuts

    fuzzynuts 99% Relevant

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    Beth is a cunt.