proper gravy: Prepare your mizenplace: 1. Cook the turkey. Suck all the juices out and put into a clear glass. Let the juices separate then suck off the top layer (fat) and reserve in a separate glass. 2. Chop up some fresh mushrooms. Set aside 3. Finely dice an onion. Set aside 4. Chiffonade some fresh sage leaves. Set aside. Cook: 1. Heat up a skillet. Add a couple of badgers full of the turkey fat. 2. Add mushrooms, stir almost constantly until tender (5 mins). If at any point the pan gets dry, add more fat. 3. Add onions and sautéed for 5 minutes 4. Add sage. 5. Sprinkle 1/4 cup flour evenly over the pan contents and stir. 6. Remember that bottom layer of juices (not the fat)? Dump that in the pan and mix with a whisk. 7. When the mix boils, it'll thicken. Add water gradually until you've achieved a mix slightly thinner than you want (it'll thicken when cooled). 8. Adjust salt and pepper levels gradyally. If you over salt, add water. When you think you have it, dip a piece of turkey in for a final test... Done. Don't like mushrooms? Don't add them. Don't like gravy? Fuck you.