Howard constantly jerking.

Discussion in 'The Howard Stern Show' started by PepeChamberz, Apr 30, 2014.

  1. PepeChamberz

    PepeChamberz New Member

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    He acts like he doesn't need so much sex from the wife but everyday he's admitting to jerking off the night before. I don't think he realizes how bad it sounds.
     
  2. Divorce Chicken

    Divorce Chicken white punk on dope VIP

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  3. Beer Chugger

    Beer Chugger Well-Known Member

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    Necrophilia
     
  4. Quite Frankly

    Quite Frankly Well-Known Member

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    He's just pretending like he still has a libido (and hetero urges), since turning 60 is a horrifying eye-opener.
     
  5. Mr Fantastic

    Mr Fantastic Found Nemo VIP

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    Happy wife, Shawshank for life.

    Oh, and 'jerking' means Ralphie came over.
     
  6. Kool

    Kool Well-Known Member

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    "After my divorce, I realized, 'Oh, wow, I can go have sex.' And I was running around, picking up women. Then all of a sudden, it dawned on me that I really didn't need that much sex. I just wanted somebody with me every minute. I was using women as a surrogate mother. When I tapped into that, it suddenly became very childish behavior." He says he realized they were using him for fame and he was using them for beauty and it was all "empty."
    Now, the admittedly neurotic Stern is happily married to Beth Ostrosky and worries about taking it for granted.

    [​IMG]Radio personality Howard Stern with wife and Northshore animal league spokesperson Beth Ostrosky Stern at a 2009 gala in New York.


    CAPTION
    By Neilson Barnard, Getty Images



    "In many ways, my marriage now is so easy, but I'm also aware that I could (screw) things up very easily. I could start getting more into my work, and ignoring what's important to Beth. I'm awfully narcissistic, and I have to keep that in check. I can't be like King Tut sitting there and expect to be taken care of, because so many times we can turn our wives into mothers."
     
  7. SlinkyNeckStern

    SlinkyNeckStern High Pitch Mike Lookalike

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    Howard tells stories of jacking off as a gift to his female audience. Womens gets wets when they hear about Howie's cock, balls, taint and cum!
     
  8. R.P. McMurphy

    R.P. McMurphy Well-Known Member

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    ...he doesnt have to worry about turning his current wife into his mother, that bitch isnt going to lift a finger.
     
  9. Halloween

    Halloween Well-Known Member

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    There isn't a shot in hell at that happening.
     
  10. pontius pilot

    pontius pilot #TeahmGandhiStarver VIP

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    [​IMG]
     
  11. The Butler

    The Butler Well-Known Member

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    If he admits to jerking off, how could he possibly be not telling the truth about his hair?
     
  12. Morrisb

    Morrisb Well-Known Member

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    Don't worry. Every couple of months, he'll swear he's over jerking off then say he's obsessed with Youporn. :coffee:
     
  13. HooHoo

    HooHoo Well-Known Member

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    "I jerked off last night" = wah wah wah my live-in mommy figure abandoned me

    Grandma Wigg isn't jerking off. Its just the pathetic chest thumping of a beta, and a passive aggressive dig at Beeth for ditching him and getting on the next chopper to Chimneyville whenever TV cameras and celebrities aren't on Howard's schedule that evening.
     
    Last edited: Apr 30, 2014
  14. Roberticus

    Roberticus Well-Known Member

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    How about a "foster" mother, who takes a few staged pictures of him, then sends him off to live with a starfucker family in eastern Ohio?
     
  15. meanredhed

    meanredhed Well-Known Member VIP Gold

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    :gross:
     
  16. misslady85

    misslady85 Well-Known Member

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    Someone needs to jerk off that wig.
     
  17. misslady85

    misslady85 Well-Known Member

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    She fakes like this every night.
     
  18. knu3421

    knu3421 Well-Known Member

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    According to nick dipaolo his junk is so small he gets a handjob from a squirrel

    I forget what roast that was from?
     
    Last edited: Apr 30, 2014
  19. HorsetoothBeth

    HorsetoothBeth Well-Known Member

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    He doesn't jerk off like he says. It's similar to his small penis lie. It's an attempt to relate to the peasants in his audience.
     
  20. SouthernListen

    SouthernListen I don't follow the crowd. Sorry about that. VIP

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    She keeps a phalanx of cats between her and him at all times.