i came home from work early today because i blew out my b-hole this morning pooing

Discussion in 'The Bar' started by Harry Gibbs, Feb 7, 2014.

  1. Harry Gibbs

    Harry Gibbs the boss of all men

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    this is real and true and i wish it weren't.

    it's not prolapsed or anything, just very very sore. i had to poo this morning and i sat on the can for like 40 minutes and the poo was too hard to come out. i pushed and pushed and nothing. i considered digital stimulation but then i figured i don't want to stick my finger into my butt, so i skipped it and held the turd in. my butt hurt so bad. then at 10:00 i had my receptionist cancel my afternoon schedule. immediately after that, i ran to the bathroom and shit like crazy. my butt hurt even worse after than. so i just came home now. i pooped again. there's blood coming out of it.

    i think it's because i had some mini baby bell mozzarella cheese last night. but only two of them.
     
  2. Oderus

    Oderus Going to hell VIP

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  3. basketcase

    basketcase Pissed that Naz only has 2 legs

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  4. nfbuckeye

    nfbuckeye Beam me up, Mr. Speaker. VIP

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    Best wishes to your sphincter for a speedy recovery.
     
  5. Mr Sinister

    Mr Sinister Gold

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    Awesome
     
  6. gilaet

    gilaet Zen As Fuck Gold

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    fag
     
  7. crazypreacher

    crazypreacher Spoon! Gold

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    Pushing is bad news.
     
  8. artful dodger

    artful dodger Well-Known Member

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    baby bell cheese AKA butt stones
     
  9. Schmoopy

    Schmoopy Shit Mult Hunter Gold

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    Not reading, faggit. Pwned!
     
  10. Schmoopy

    Schmoopy Shit Mult Hunter Gold

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    Rated one star, faggit. Pwned!
     
  11. nazdrowie

    nazdrowie Sultan of Sweat Gold

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    wow
     
  12. artiesoffspring

    artiesoffspring Hugs and kisses

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    I can eat a whole thing of those mini Babybells and not get brick turd.
     
  13. Danas Boyfrien

    Danas Boyfrien Trump's African American Gold

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    Sore cock garage.
     
  14. Blackened

    Blackened Commitment to Excellence VIP

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    prolapsed pwnage
     
  15. Capn Crud

    Capn Crud The Pride of Cucamonga VIP Gold

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     upper decker
     
  16. artiesoffspring

    artiesoffspring Hugs and kisses

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    :nopic:
     
  17. geo

    geo Well-Known Member

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    you men really like to talk about turdage :headscratch:
     
  18. artiesoffspring

    artiesoffspring Hugs and kisses

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    Do you like to have yours pushed in or do you prefer to clean out your pipe before anal?
     
  19. Schmoopy

    Schmoopy Shit Mult Hunter Gold

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    :fail::cwl:
     
  20. Schmoopy

    Schmoopy Shit Mult Hunter Gold

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    Clutch just put me on ignore, faggit. Pwned!