News I think I'm dying right now.

Discussion in 'The Howard Stern Show' started by Daveindiego, Apr 4, 2016.

  1. Daveindiego

    Daveindiego Confirmed Internet Legend Banned User

    Reputations:
    121,867
    Joined:
    Sep 19, 2010
    Messages:
    87,614
    Likes Received:
    44,003
    So I was just taking a shower, and was shaving in the shower, when I rinsed my razor in the shower stream. Well, I blasted both of my eyes with harsh stubble residue, and now my eyes hurt like I have the beach in them.

    Only possible outcome that I can think up is death.

    :fil:

    :davetoke:
     
    Mr. Potato Head and SomerSky like this.
  2. Daveindiego

    Daveindiego Confirmed Internet Legend Banned User

    Reputations:
    121,867
    Joined:
    Sep 19, 2010
    Messages:
    87,614
    Likes Received:
    44,003
    And now I'm starting to get hungry.

    :dave:
     
  3. ClintDagger

    ClintDagger The REAL Nature Boy - Exec VP Larry, Inc VIP

    Reputations:
    55,332
    Joined:
    Apr 9, 2014
    Messages:
    18,844
    Likes Received:
    64,908
    Hang in there Dave
     
    Scarlett Ohara likes this.
  4. Walygatr

    Walygatr Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    56,523
    Joined:
    Dec 13, 2011
    Messages:
    11,303
    Likes Received:
    32,172
  5. Daveindiego

    Daveindiego Confirmed Internet Legend Banned User

    Reputations:
    121,867
    Joined:
    Sep 19, 2010
    Messages:
    87,614
    Likes Received:
    44,003
    It was like 4 day stubble growth, and it was a lot of it. :fil:
     
  6. dawg

    dawg In The Dog House Staff Member

    Reputations:
    100,998
    Joined:
    Aug 19, 2010
    Messages:
    134,410
    Likes Received:
    117,952
    You're an old man, Dave.
     
  7. Khalil

    Khalil participant

    Reputations:
    12
    Joined:
    Sep 14, 2014
    Messages:
    5,659
    Likes Received:
    20,759
    Never had beach in my eyes. Sounds like a bitch.
     
    larryluncg, RenchFries and Sleep like this.
  8. Artie Laugh

    Artie Laugh **** VIP Gold

    Reputations:
    11,072
    Joined:
    May 10, 2012
    Messages:
    8,591
    Likes Received:
    7,448
    Go get a burro at that taco shop.
     
  9. Daveindiego

    Daveindiego Confirmed Internet Legend Banned User

    Reputations:
    121,867
    Joined:
    Sep 19, 2010
    Messages:
    87,614
    Likes Received:
    44,003
    I'm not even 47 yet, Dawg! :fil:
     
    ClintDagger likes this.
  10. CrucifiedAGT

    CrucifiedAGT He's Around VIP

    Reputations:
    61,624
    Joined:
    Nov 23, 2013
    Messages:
    13,151
    Likes Received:
    29,928
    Let's not be too hasty on the well wishes, Bro.
     
  11. ApeFace

    ApeFace Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    11,063
    Joined:
    Jun 4, 2012
    Messages:
    4,604
    Likes Received:
    12,134
    I was peeling a potato once, towards myself like a total retard, and a piece of the skin went in my eye. I was a step away from popping my eyeball out with a screwdriver. It hurt like a bitch for a few hours. On a positive note, my wife never asked me to help her again.
     
    CrucifiedAGT and DiamondGoddess like this.
  12. Daveindiego

    Daveindiego Confirmed Internet Legend Banned User

    Reputations:
    121,867
    Joined:
    Sep 19, 2010
    Messages:
    87,614
    Likes Received:
    44,003
    a.) that is a donkey, and you don't get donkeys at the taco shop.

    b.) if I walked into either one of my primary taco shops today, that'd look at me like I'm seriously fucked up. You can't go in every day, they start to get too familiar.
     
  13. Chief Macho

    Chief Macho Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    1,580
    Joined:
    Apr 10, 2012
    Messages:
    837
    Likes Received:
    989
    Hang your boyfriend jizz in them.
     
  14. Daveindiego

    Daveindiego Confirmed Internet Legend Banned User

    Reputations:
    121,867
    Joined:
    Sep 19, 2010
    Messages:
    87,614
    Likes Received:
    44,003
    When women ask for help, I find that feigning severe ignorance will cease the requests.
     
    ApeFace likes this.
  15. Daveindiego

    Daveindiego Confirmed Internet Legend Banned User

    Reputations:
    121,867
    Joined:
    Sep 19, 2010
    Messages:
    87,614
    Likes Received:
    44,003
    Who the fuck is this guy?

    No, for reals, who the fuck is this guy?
     
    hey later and Mugsy like this.
  16. crash83

    crash83 VIP Extreme Gold

    Reputations:
    152,725
    Joined:
    Dec 13, 2011
    Messages:
    7,188
    Likes Received:
    14,450
    47 is the new 67 :dontknow:
     
  17. lilbuddy67

    lilbuddy67 A man with breath-taking anger management issues Banned User

    Reputations:
    3
    Joined:
    Aug 23, 2010
    Messages:
    13,272
    Likes Received:
    15,753
    Buh-bye now
     
    Pooh bear likes this.
  18. ClintDagger

    ClintDagger The REAL Nature Boy - Exec VP Larry, Inc VIP

    Reputations:
    55,332
    Joined:
    Apr 9, 2014
    Messages:
    18,844
    Likes Received:
    64,908
    Dave is a legend
     
    GLguygardner likes this.
  19. kingofallmessicans

    kingofallmessicans Sandy Cunt

    Reputations:
    0
    Joined:
    Feb 5, 2015
    Messages:
    1,720
    Likes Received:
    4,585
    Please don't die until after November. I'd like to see the meltdown.
    1458086911769.jpg
     
  20. Mugsy

    Mugsy Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    229
    Joined:
    Aug 14, 2013
    Messages:
    1,817
    Likes Received:
    3,670
    Maybe you shouldn't strain your eyes by staring at a screen... I think you need to give up ALL cell phone, computer, and TV viewing for at least several years! :grad:
     
    Rahm2015 likes this.