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If You Were Tied To A Chair...

Discussion in 'The Howard Stern Show' started by dexterdog, Nov 23, 2012.

  1. dexterdog

    dexterdog New Member

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    ...and forced to listen to Abe Kanan, how long would be before you would be screaming for mercy and begging for someone to change the channel for you? This morning on my commute to work I turned on 101 expecting Jay Thomas, or a repeat at the very least, and what did we get?
    Abe fucking Kanan. And he'll be on for the full THREE hours.
    I lasted exactly seven minutes before I had to bail. How did this fuck ever get on the radio? Who is he blowing? Does he work for free?? Does he pay to actually be on the air??? Geez, I'd rather listen to dead air than that dumb fuck and his boring, uninteresting side-kicks.
     
  2. newcastlefan

    newcastlefan גֵּרְשֹׁם VIP

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    depends on what else is on. if its opposite SFRT I would rather listen to Kanan.
     
  3. SouthernListen

    SouthernListen PLATINUM SPONSOR VIP

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    I keep an ampule of potassium cyanide hidden in my mouth just in case this very thing happens.
     
  4. Gluecifer

    Gluecifer New Member

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    I got rid of Sirius before Abe had a show, what does he even talk about?
     
  5. tv910

    tv910 Well-Known Member

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    Not very long. Last year I was outdoors staining my deck and didn't plan on going back into the house until it had dried. I left the window open and was listening to H101 but unfortunately I didn't realize Abe Kanan was coming on next. After a few minutes I couldn't take it any more and walked across the wet deck to change the channel. I tried to hold out but it was so awful and annoying I couldn't stand it. Worst show in the history of radio.
     
  6. Gusbuss

    Gusbuss Well-Known Member VIP

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    Same thing happened to me. What a piece of shit show. And we get to pay for it too!
     
  7. Lou Skunt

    Lou Skunt ____________________ Gold

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    I'm a pussy, the tears and begging would commence at the mention of said torture. Kudos to you for making it 7 minutes.
     
  8. tv910

    tv910 Well-Known Member

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    Their phony phone calls should be used to force murderers and terrorists into confessing. No one could last more than a minute without spilling their guts and begging for mercy.
     
  9. Obi Drunkenobe

    Obi Drunkenobe Well-Known Member VIP

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    Abe Kanan is a perfect example of Stern just not giving a shit. He really should be fired. Malone please put Howard out of his misery. :pray:
     
  10. tv910

    tv910 Well-Known Member

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    For anyone who hasn't heard Abe Kanan and wants to see just how bad it is, they're rerunning it at 2:00 pm on H101. See how long you last.
     
  11. Quite Frankly

    Quite Frankly Well-Known Member

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    Abe is using this show as a stepping stone to getting a paying gig some day...
     
  12. dexterdog

    dexterdog New Member

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    I'm sure he's a nice guy and all in real life, it's just that he simply doesn't belong on the radio attempting to entertain an audience. He's lame, incredibly unfunny and has zero personality. I've tried on a few occasions to give it a chance but it's futile. Nothing he talks about keeps me interested and quite often his Chicago-centric stories or experiences go right over my head.
    He has to realize that he's on satellite radio and heard by listeners who probably can't even find Chicago on a map much less give a flying fuck about what goes on there. Contrast this with a Jay Thomas, who at times can be pretty flat too but at least is experienced enough to know that you have to tailor your material to a broad audience and not bore the shit out of your listeners.
    And the goofs he has in studio with him are pathetic at best. They add nothing to the mix. This is not a revolution, it's an abomination. Today seven minutes was all I could take...
     

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