I'm going to a haunted house this weekend!

Discussion in 'The Bar' started by Mark Mayonnaise, Oct 7, 2010.

  1. Mark Mayonnaise

    Mark Mayonnaise You look like a tree! VIP

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  2. BleedingGums

    BleedingGums Fesh Fox Faggot VIP

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  3. Mark Mayonnaise

    Mark Mayonnaise You look like a tree! VIP

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    Holy shit

    I'm reading the FAQ on the Haunted House's website, which apparently was written by a Vietnamese fresh off the boat

    Do I get my money back if you do not scare me?
    NO! We are sorry if your were not scared, but if you watched every young person exit the haunt. They will all say they were not scared because they do now want to look sacred in the eyes of there friends. Also you have to be willing to let your self be scared, we do our best to scare and or entertain you. Each person has a different level of being scared and we try to reach them of all, but some of us are just not willing.
     
  4. k4D3t

    k4D3t Reverse Apache Master VIP

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    I get nothing out of haunted houses -- thankfully I have kids, and can enjoy watching them get the bejebus scared out of them
     
  5. Mark Mayonnaise

    Mark Mayonnaise You look like a tree! VIP

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    I act like they don't scare me but I'm one of those fags who hurries through it so I don't get grabbed or screamed at or anything

    I'm like this


    [​IMG]
     
  6. k4D3t

    k4D3t Reverse Apache Master VIP

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    NO! So solly. If you not scared, you prolly just save face for number one friend. No refund, no exception.

     
  7. k4D3t

    k4D3t Reverse Apache Master VIP

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    I'm more afraid of the awkwardness that comes from looking a grown man in a costume in the eye who is trying to scare me and have no reaction.

     
  8. Mark Mayonnaise

    Mark Mayonnaise You look like a tree! VIP

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    :facepalm:

    Will the actors touch us?
    Our staffs will not instinctually or aggressively grab you, however, we are here to scare you and we do get very close to do just that. Please understand we are doing what you paid for us to do. We want you to get your moneys worth, every last cent! However, you do not have any right to touch the actors or staff, we are here to intertain you not for your intertainment pleasures.You will be asked to leave if you attach the actors or props.
     
  9. Mark Mayonnaise

    Mark Mayonnaise You look like a tree! VIP

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    LOL Ohio
     
  10. k4D3t

    k4D3t Reverse Apache Master VIP

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    you'll be expecting this:

    [​IMG]

    but get this:

    [​IMG]
     
  11. PullMyFinger

    PullMyFinger Hors d'oeuvre Addict VIP

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    Years ago they had a Haunted Mansion in Long Branch NJ and my uncle was caught off guard when a guy in an ape mask jumped out and grabbed him. He puched the guy in the ape mask. It was a good shot too, sent the guy flying into a coffin. Anyway, he got banned for life and they had his photo posted up until the pier burnt down years ago. We gave him grief about that for years.
     
  12. Mark Mayonnaise

    Mark Mayonnaise You look like a tree! VIP

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    I'll literally be using Miss Chriza as a human shield
     
  13. k4D3t

    k4D3t Reverse Apache Master VIP

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    :lol:

     
    Last edited by a moderator: Jun 23, 2014
  14. Mark Mayonnaise

    Mark Mayonnaise You look like a tree! VIP

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    I just found out its RIGHT next to my bar

    We're gonna get all fucked up and stumble around a haunted house

    A true Richard Christy Experience
     
  15. ChuckZ

    ChuckZ You're so pusillanimous, oh yea.

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    Don't get too scared & lose more hair.
     
  16. Mark Mayonnaise

    Mark Mayonnaise You look like a tree! VIP

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    Chuck loves haunted houses because its dark and he is free to grope young boys
     
  17. ChuckZ

    ChuckZ You're so pusillanimous, oh yea.

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    You're obsessed with young boys, so that's the real reason you are going.
     
  18. Mark Mayonnaise

    Mark Mayonnaise You look like a tree! VIP

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    Yes to protect them from people like you. I'm Saint Chriza, the patron saint of guarding children's asshole purity.
     
  19. ChuckZ

    ChuckZ You're so pusillanimous, oh yea.

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    I'm sure you cover them up with your hands.
     
  20. Club

    Club New Member

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    What the fuck bro :mad: