I'm Trying To Help a Bird

Discussion in 'The Howard Stern Show' started by LawyerLarry, Jun 14, 2015.

  1. LawyerLarry

    LawyerLarry Mr. Fuckmoney in the Bank VIP

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    I live across the street from a bank and a theater. When I went to the bank after work on Friday, I noticed a bird in the parking lot. It seemed a little strange to me, so I drove up close and noticed that the bird had an egg in a little hole in the parking lot it was protecting. I went home and went about my business and remembered that there was a concert at the theater later that night. I thought people would be parking in the bank parking lot and didn't want them to drive over the egg or anything, so I got a cinder block and put it near the bird and its egg. I checked on it yesterday and today and it's still there. I'm just concerned that the baby bird isn't going to survive in a parking lot even if it hatches.
     
  2. newcastlefan

    newcastlefan גֵּרְשֹׁם VIP

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    odds are it won't make it to hatch because a cat or rat will find it at night, but if it does something else will eat it because it will make noise. if you want it to live you will have to take it, hatch it, wean it, and raise it because it's mom will not touch it once you touch it and it acquires your smell. otherwise you have to accept it's future as "life".
     
  3. LawyerLarry

    LawyerLarry Mr. Fuckmoney in the Bank VIP

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    Yeah, that sucks. I'm surprised a cat hasn't already got it. I can't raise it because I have a cat too.
     
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  4. Slow

    Slow All The Pieces Matter DawgShed News

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    #larryspurpose
     
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  5. SmurfCock

    SmurfCock Well-Known Member

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    I'm confused..is this a forum for the ramblings of mongoloids..or a discussion of the stern show?
     
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  6. Shortwave98

    Shortwave98 A-Number 1 Banned User

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    You have to chew up his food and spit it into his beak!:c
     
  7. zutroy

    zutroy Totally nude. Totally flawless.

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    [​IMG]
     
  8. LawyerLarry

    LawyerLarry Mr. Fuckmoney in the Bank VIP

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    My life is much more fascinating than the Stern show.
     
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  9. stash

    stash 2017 Kimbra of All Media VIP

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    i like and respect birds.. i even talk to birds sometimes. the other day i was leaving the bank in my car... acouple of them were drinking from a puddle in the roadway... they moved for me. i thanked them. "thaks guys, have a good one" or something to that effect

    :hat:
     
  10. balloon knot

    balloon knot Well-Known Member

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    i would help this bird :wub:
     
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  11. RONNIE THE CLAW

    RONNIE THE CLAW Well-Known Member VIP

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    You are a real decent and special guy to have the thought, the spirit and heart to worry about the destiny of this bird and her poor egg and then try and protect it as you did. Nature somehow allowed the mother to choose this area to nest for her offspring, unless it is as a result of some other happening. Why she allowed this is a mystery and we are left to often passively watch natures defeat of the frail and forgotten. I wish I knew the answer to this dilemma and just as much, I hope you find some peace with whatever decision you make.
     
  12. newcastlefan

    newcastlefan גֵּרְשֹׁם VIP

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    and it won't just be "raising" it: the bird will imprint to you and expect that its future mate will look like you. you will not be able to set it free later as it will not have learned how to find food or to care (ie. protect) for itself. given these truths it is often kinder to let life proceed early before it can experience enough to recognize fear, pain, and expectations.

    “People have forgotten this truth," the fox said. "But you mustn’t forget it. You become responsible forever for what you’ve tamed. You’re responsible for your rose.”
    Antoine de Saint-Exupéry, The Little Prince

    otherwise you have to allow life to proceed as it does, with all its beauty, and cruelty.
     
  13. monsoon

    monsoon Who are you with?

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    I'm never trying to help a bird again. I always get screwed. I still don't know what happened to my hawk.
    I tried like hell to contact the lady at the bird sanctuary that was helping it. Nobody ever got back to me and when I drove down there. I couldn't tell which one it was and nobody knew anything.

    See. Ya try to help and you just get screwed and your heart broke.


    F mutt
     
  14. ClumpyStern

    ClumpyStern HSS-clean since Dec 2011 VIP

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    You might as well move it because concrete absorbs enough heat to roast it in the shell if it hasn't already. I believe the thing about human touch is a myth because researchers touch eggs in nests all the time without a problem. If that area gets a lot of direct sun exposure, it's probably already dead. I'd consider either removing it and smashing it quickly so the bird can just move on or making some kind of nest, removing the egg while the bird is there and putting it up in some tree where the bird can see where you put it. IMO, either of those options is better than letting it just get roasted in the hole with the bird hopping around and risking its life protecting a dead egg. Wear some latex gloves if you're worried about human scent.
     
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  15. Weed

    Weed Well-Known Member

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  16. check1

    check1 VIP Extreme Gold

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    The former...now get in line or gtfo.
     
  17. newcastlefan

    newcastlefan גֵּרְשֹׁם VIP

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    there's a difference between believing and experiencing.

    birds' body temp is far higher than ours and they actually need the temp at levels that we would feel as burning while being hatched because until their feathers and down dry they have no mechanism to regulate their body heat.

    i don't know what will happen to an egg wrapped in concrete or asphalt as I've never tried it. you're probably right about the egg's chances although if it cooked in the concrete i figure a cat or dog would have found it by now given how much better their sense of smell is.
     
  18. newcastlefan

    newcastlefan גֵּרְשֹׁם VIP

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    we don't mind your ramblings, and I haven't seen anyone refer to you as a mongoloid, yet.
     
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  19. stash

    stash 2017 Kimbra of All Media VIP

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  20. Drungle

    Drungle VIP Extreme Gold

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    Join instagram, message Beth about it, post her instructions here. Otherwise, you might just have to sit on that egg yourself til it hatches (like in an old Foghorn Leghorn cartoon.)