ITT: Baltimore Mike please give advice on buying a new car

Discussion in 'The Bar' started by Popeye Saavedra, Aug 6, 2014.

  1. Popeye Saavedra

    Popeye Saavedra Well-Known Member

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    Mike, I am going to buy a new car (not a fucking Hyundai). While I have bought new cars in the past and have experience with this, I really want to Jew them down as much as possible. Please give me your insider tips (from the perspective of a sleazy car salesman) on how to completely rape the dealership that I buy my car from.
     
  2. baltimore mike

    baltimore mike I wear panties 24/7 364

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    make sure you have your own finance set up
     
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  3. baltimore mike

    baltimore mike I wear panties 24/7 364

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    you have a trade?
     
  4. Popeye Saavedra

    Popeye Saavedra Well-Known Member

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    I'm paying cash in full.
     
  5. Popeye Saavedra

    Popeye Saavedra Well-Known Member

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    No trade.
     
  6. baltimore mike

    baltimore mike I wear panties 24/7 364

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    ask them to see the invoice and ask how much dealer hold back is
     
  7. Popeye Saavedra

    Popeye Saavedra Well-Known Member

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    Please elaborate on this and advise on how I should use this information in my negotiations.
     
  8. baltimore mike

    baltimore mike I wear panties 24/7 364

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    what kind of car?
     
  9. Lemmy

    Lemmy Douchebag Extraordinaire Gold

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    Be prepared to walk out and do so if necessary. Know exactly what you want as far as a deal before stepping foot in the joint.
     
  10. Popeye Saavedra

    Popeye Saavedra Well-Known Member

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    I know this part of it. I don't even agree to buy anything while in the dealership. I play the dealerships off each other and do all of this through email or on the phone. I only go in to check out the cars, test drive, and sign the papers after everything has already been negotiated and agreed upon.
     
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  11. Lemmy

    Lemmy Douchebag Extraordinaire Gold

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    Well fuck you then.
     
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  12. Popeye Saavedra

    Popeye Saavedra Well-Known Member

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    I appreciate your efforts though man. Seriously.
     
  13. Lemmy

    Lemmy Douchebag Extraordinaire Gold

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    It sounds like you have a good plan! Whatcha getting?
     
  14. Popeye Saavedra

    Popeye Saavedra Well-Known Member

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    Not a jeep. :snicker:
     
  15. Lemmy

    Lemmy Douchebag Extraordinaire Gold

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    My Wrangler is perfect for my needs. I'm sure your new Beetle will suit you just fine. :c

    Sorry, I didn't know your new car was a secret. :nojj:
     
  16. nserafini

    nserafini Well-Known Member

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    Fuckin' cholo .... Why would you pay all cash? I don't know your deal, but if you have that kind of $$$, just finance it at a low rate with a loan in place beforehand. Second, it's a transaction above $10K, so expect a visit from the IRS on the size of the deal. Finally, enjoy the additional taxes you may have to pay.

    Just be a normal chon chon and finance.
     
  17. baltimore mike

    baltimore mike I wear panties 24/7 364

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    gay sex
     
  18. Popeye Saavedra

    Popeye Saavedra Well-Known Member

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    First of all, it's not like I'm spending all my cash on this car you dumb nig. I have other investments and cash so financing really isn't getting me anything I don't already have. That's nickel and dime bullshit. Also, the IRS isn't going to come to me dipshit. The dealer has to deal with that since I am paying THEM. If they were giving me $10,000 then I'd have to worry about that. I don't know what you are talking about in additional taxes. Never had to pay any additional taxes in the past when I bought new cars in cash.
     
  19. Lemmy

    Lemmy Douchebag Extraordinaire Gold

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    Internet baller. Paying cash for a Hyundai. :jj:
     
  20. Popeye Saavedra

    Popeye Saavedra Well-Known Member

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    I'm not buying a hyundai goddamnit. :pissed: