Jack Reacher..

Discussion in 'The Howard Stern Show' started by Nurse Remulak, Jan 19, 2013.

  1. Nurse Remulak

    Nurse Remulak New Member

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    Tom Cruise's new movie.. Saw it last night.. Made it half way through and got up, left the theater and asked for a refund. Fucking unwatchable.

    Can't wait to hear Howard and Robins review. Bet they will both love it!

    But I warn ya.. Save your money.
     
  2. Nibbler

    Nibbler heaven is in your mind Gold

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    Tom Cruise was very miscast. In the book, Jack Reacher is over 6 feet tall, imposing and supernaturally strong. Not a shrimpy, little guy in lifts. Tom Cruise is about as tough as a limp noodle.
     
  3. Nurse Remulak

    Nurse Remulak New Member

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    It was bloody AWFUL.

    SPOILER ALERT!!

    1) Mean ol' DA - check
    2) Estranged hot lawyer daughter of mean ol' DA defending the perp against father's wishes - check
    3) Decorated Jason Bourne character who can do anything to anyone anywhere yet has no identity - check
    4) Good cop who hates Jack Reacher then basically ends up wanting to blow Jack Reacher - check
    5) Obligatory bar fight with 5 guys and guess who wins? - check
    6) Terrible acting - check
    7) Plot holes you could drive a fleet of fucking MAC trucks through - check

    ... at that point I got up and left the theater. ugh.. what a pile of Hollywood dung. ;)
     
  4. Caster Fly

    Caster Fly New Member Banned User

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    If you are still there when he says "thanks for the coffee counselor" for the second time and you are thinking "it can't get any worse"...

    You're wrong. :facepalm:
     
  5. Dainty Jainty

    Dainty Jainty New Member

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    Quit trying to promote the Stern show, Jason.
     
  6. Nurse Remulak

    Nurse Remulak New Member

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    Already been confirmed by mods in another thread that I am not A) connected to "the show" and B) not the sock puppet of about 20 various ex-SFN posters.

    But keep up the good detective work Dainty! ;)
     
    Last edited: Jan 19, 2013
  7. The Snork

    The Snork Well-Known Member VIP Gold

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    No tits no care.
     
  8. Nurse Remulak

    Nurse Remulak New Member

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    Hahaha! You are soooo right. My Bad.. here ya go.

    [​IMG]
     
  9. AcquiringSignal

    AcquiringSignal Girthy VIP

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    Wasn't this movie released almost a month ago?
     
  10. Anfkid

    Anfkid Blue Banner Mafia Staff Member

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    Tom Cruise only did two good movies Interview With a Vampire and The Firm. Everything else they just needed a pretty boy and his acting was horrible.
     
  11. Nurse Remulak

    Nurse Remulak New Member

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    Ya.. Something like that.

    One of the best disses I've heard in a while was... "Fuck Dude... that was gayer than the volleyball scene in Top Gun!" ;)
     
  12. Stinkfist

    Stinkfist Well-Known Member

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    This.

    The books are a lot of fun. Reacher drives into a new town, makes a ton of enemies and gets shit done. Have not seen the movie, but I love the books.

    There are lots of fun moments in the books when Reacher's strength even surprises him. He kills a man with a single punch to the chest in one book. He is surprised until he realizes he just witnessed, Commotio cordis, he struck the bad guy in the chest at a precise time in the cycle of the heart beat that caused the heart to fail.

    Tom Cruise is Jack Reacher like ETM is Frankenstein's Monster.
     
  13. shockingmary

    shockingmary New Member Banned User

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    ......because they are members of the IIlluminati