Leonardo DiCaprio 'raped twice by a BEAR

Discussion in 'The Howard Stern Show' started by Nemo, Dec 1, 2015.

  1. Nemo

    Nemo Beer Can Thick Gold

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    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/art...looks-poised-finally-achieve-Oscar-glory.html

    Leonardo DiCaprio 'raped twice by a BEAR in his new film The Revenant' as actor makes latest bid for Oscar glory
    • Leonardo DiCaprio reportedly gets raped by a bear twice in his new film The Revenant according to a claim made by Drudge Report
    • The film is based on a novel of the same name which tells the story of frontiersman Hugh Glass
    • Glass was attacked by a bear in 1823 in South Dakota and nearly died, but it was a female bear protecting her two cubs
    • The bear in the book is also a female and there is no mention of a rape
    • Reviews of the film are embargoed, but many believe it will win five-time Oscar nominee DiCaprio his first Academy Award
     
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  2. MrWarmth

    MrWarmth HELPED BUILD THIS DUMP Gold

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    Tony Curtis fucked Yvonne DeCarlo
     
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  3. Tipsey Russell

    Tipsey Russell VIP Extreme Gold

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    the jokes here are too easy to make
    and the pictures that will be posted are nasty
     
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  4. thegroovologist

    thegroovologist VIP Extreme Gold

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  5. potroast

    potroast Well-Known Member

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  6. Nemo

    Nemo Beer Can Thick Gold

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    Someone felt the story needed some bear rape to get Leo an Oscar?
     
  7. Walygatr

    Walygatr Well-Known Member

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    I heard he went down on the Bear like he was on the Titanic.
     
  8. joemama

    joemama Well-Known Member

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    [​IMG]
     
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  9. AcquiringSignal

    AcquiringSignal Girthy VIP

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  10. thegroovologist

    thegroovologist VIP Extreme Gold

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  11. MrWarmth

    MrWarmth HELPED BUILD THIS DUMP Gold

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    Moe: "How can a bear rape you?!"
    Curly: "its bearly possible! Nyuk Nyuk!"
    <<<<<slap>>>>>
     
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  12. SouthernListen

    SouthernListen I don't follow the crowd. Sorry about that. VIP

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    Once is Bear rape. Twice means you liked it.
     
  13. YinzerMasshole

    YinzerMasshole VIP Extreme Gold

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    Isn't that how it always works? Sean Penn had to play a retard. Charlize Theoran had to play an ugly chick. It's just stupid.
     
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  14. Stinkfist

    Stinkfist Well-Known Member

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    Have not read this book, but have heard good things.

    Have read this will be the closest to seeing Blood Meridian in a theater we will likely get.


    Whatever in creation exists without my knowledge exists without my consent.
     
  15. irvin

    irvin Well-Known Member

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    It should have been Beth.
     
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  16. Nick Manning

    Nick Manning Well-Known Member VIP

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    Raped by a female bear that's protecting her cubs? :facepalm:The bear is going to kill and eat you and not necessarily in that order. Now, if by "bear", Leo means a Hollywood executive, than I'm sure he's experienced that in real life.
     
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  17. Benjamen

    Benjamen Well-Known Member

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    [​IMG]

    Black Bear Attacks, Rapes Zookeeper

    SAN DIEGO -- Here's a little dog-bites-man tale we couldn't resist! Except replace "dog" with "850-pound black bear"! And "bites" with "anally violate"!

    Yes, last Saturday a zookeeper at the Metropolitan Zoo had "claws" for alarm when he was attacked and raped by the same black bear he had raised from a cub! Geez, talk about gratitude!

    "It was horrible, just horrible, " sobbed an eyewitness. Guess she sure got an eyeful!

    The bear, named "Barry", " attacked zookeeper Ron Gilks as Gilks entered the cage to give him dinner. Barry lunged at his throat, goring him with his huge claws and razor-sharp teeth. Some of the claw marks were three-quarters of an inch deep. Ouch!

    Then, astonished onlookers could "bearly" believe what happened next--Barry began to brutally rape zookeeper Gilks!

    Frantic zookeepers rushed for rifles as others tried to divert the bear. But there was no stopping Barry! This bear kept "bearing down, " and Gilks just had to grin and "bear" it! Maybe Barry was mistaking him for his "honey"!

    Barry's 27-inch phallus, armed with guard hairs as sharp as red-hot needles, shot through Gilks' rectum, shattered his lower spine and skewered his colon, causing his entire lower torso to "cave" in! Yikes! Bet that wasn't the type of "cave" you had in mind when you took up zookeeping, Mr. Gilks!

    And can you imagine Gilks' surprise when Barry's putrid ursine semen flooded his ruptured chest cavity? (By the way, Mr. Gilks, whatever cologne you've been wearing, where can the public get some?)

    Finally, zookeeper Eric Pulliam shot Barry with a tranquilizer gun and pulled Gilks from the cage. The unconscious bear was later destroyed. Hey, this "Yogi" made a major "Boo-Boo"!

    "I have worked with dangerous animals before, " zoo director Kate Donegal said. "But never have I seen any animal sexually assault a human being." "Barry"? Try "Scary"!

    Meanwhile, Gilks was pronounced dead at an area hospital--but at least he died grinning and bearing it! No doubt, this episode gives new meaning to the term, "Do not feed the bears!"
     
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  18. pickles3000

    pickles3000 Well-Known Member Banned User

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  19. Rodney21a

    Rodney21a Well-Known Member Banned User

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    So this one day they Barry wanted some PUSSY instead of Food
     
  20. The Snork

    The Snork VIP Extreme Gold

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    x76 likes this.