Lets play a game, step by step of Beth's con

Discussion in 'The Howard Stern Show' started by JessOnCrack, Jun 9, 2013.

  1. JessOnCrack

    JessOnCrack Check out my maniacal laugh! Banned User

    Reputations:
    81,325
    Joined:
    Jan 14, 2013
    Messages:
    3,269
    Likes Received:
    6,841
    I'll go first

    step 1: mistakingly bump into him at a party, pretend not to know who he was, ditch current date for richer man
     
  2. Snotty

    Snotty My Snothand be strong!!! VIP Gold

    Reputations:
    83,466
    Joined:
    May 13, 2012
    Messages:
    25,310
    Likes Received:
    17,785
    Wash the stench of Crazy Cabbie out of your twat.........................
     
  3. crazypreacher

    crazypreacher Hey yo

    Reputations:
    223,819
    Joined:
    Sep 1, 2010
    Messages:
    47,165
    Likes Received:
    42,558
    One, I repeat one toothy bj.
     
  4. telecaster

    telecaster Get Yer Ya Ya's Out

    Reputations:
    86,481
    Joined:
    Dec 13, 2011
    Messages:
    5,859
    Likes Received:
    2,026
    :snicker:
     
  5. Snotty

    Snotty My Snothand be strong!!! VIP Gold

    Reputations:
    83,466
    Joined:
    May 13, 2012
    Messages:
    25,310
    Likes Received:
    17,785
    Throw yourself between Hamptons kawk and Ralphiecakes anus.......................
     
  6. Brokenbad

    Brokenbad Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    23,663
    Joined:
    Apr 23, 2012
    Messages:
    5,127
    Likes Received:
    4,441
    Express sincere desire not to be famous and then go home and hide the hookah and I Dream of Jeannie outfit.
     
  7. Snotty

    Snotty My Snothand be strong!!! VIP Gold

    Reputations:
    83,466
    Joined:
    May 13, 2012
    Messages:
    25,310
    Likes Received:
    17,785
    Call your Mom and tell her to hang up you so you can create a complete tale of fiction.............
     
  8. Dlist

    Dlist Well-Known Member VIP

    Reputations:
    340,301
    Joined:
    Jan 16, 2012
    Messages:
    28,614
    Likes Received:
    37,744
    Great thread...

    Step 2...once she realized she was actually hitting on Ralph by mistake, rushed over to the real Howard, Mr Moneybags
    Step 3..pretend to be in awe of everything he does or says
    Step 4....when your shitty apartment's roof leaks, tell Howard it is fine, and you'll "make do" Insert slight tear in eye for effect.....( & HOWARD MOVES HER IN!!! check!)
    Step 5....Tell him you don't care about money, buy $27 dollar dresses to keep up the sham, and don't seek any attention whore fame thing....for a while
    Step 6...Tell him you don't want to get married, but his kids don't respect you and the doorman makes 'remarks'....but it is ok....(insert a bit of glassy eyes almost crying look, maybe throw in a tremble of the lip.....(GETS ENGAGEMENT RING!!! check!)
     
  9. telecaster

    telecaster Get Yer Ya Ya's Out

    Reputations:
    86,481
    Joined:
    Dec 13, 2011
    Messages:
    5,859
    Likes Received:
    2,026
    Beth Ostrosky: A Manufactured Life.
     
  10. Dlist

    Dlist Well-Known Member VIP

    Reputations:
    340,301
    Joined:
    Jan 16, 2012
    Messages:
    28,614
    Likes Received:
    37,744
    I can do Step 7 through 10 right up to Beth's midlife Palm Beach baby if you want, and wrap it all up with Howard as an old man living back in the basement again. Funny how that full circle thing works.
     
  11. Snotty

    Snotty My Snothand be strong!!! VIP Gold

    Reputations:
    83,466
    Joined:
    May 13, 2012
    Messages:
    25,310
    Likes Received:
    17,785
    Get Consuela to shove a lemon up a chickens ass, Cook it and you take all the credit....................
     
  12. JessOnCrack

    JessOnCrack Check out my maniacal laugh! Banned User

    Reputations:
    81,325
    Joined:
    Jan 14, 2013
    Messages:
    3,269
    Likes Received:
    6,841
    step 8 tell him you dont want to have children, you never wanted to have children, then, once you're married, tell him you really want a baby
     
  13. Snotty

    Snotty My Snothand be strong!!! VIP Gold

    Reputations:
    83,466
    Joined:
    May 13, 2012
    Messages:
    25,310
    Likes Received:
    17,785
    Smother him in cats...............
     
  14. jyanks

    jyanks Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    29,937
    Joined:
    Dec 13, 2011
    Messages:
    7,098
    Likes Received:
    4,002
    Step 1 - Audition for Son of the Beach.
     
  15. LaserT

    LaserT You have to have fun. Gold

    Reputations:
    348,112
    Joined:
    May 3, 2013
    Messages:
    20,087
    Likes Received:
    37,019
    Her mother hung up when she knew what Beth was doing. She knew Beth was giving up her youth and children you an old mans money and pretending she liked him. Her mother hung up for a very good reason. Beth and Howard just change the story.
     
  16. Kokonut

    Kokonut Active Member

    Reputations:
    24
    Joined:
    Aug 22, 2012
    Messages:
    428
    Likes Received:
    58
    Step by step ooh baby
    Gonna get to you girl
    Step by step ooh baby
    Really want you in my world

    Step, step, step
    Step by step

    (Danny) Step one, we can have lots of fun
    (Donnie) Step two, there's so much we can do
    (Jordan) Step three, it's just you for me
    (Joe) Step four, I can give you more
    (Jon) Step five, don't you know that the time has arrived
     
  17. LaserT

    LaserT You have to have fun. Gold

    Reputations:
    348,112
    Joined:
    May 3, 2013
    Messages:
    20,087
    Likes Received:
    37,019
    Step 1: I WANT MONEY MONEY MONEY!!!!
    Step 2: Let him think I don't want to be famous!
    Step 3: I hooked the old dope! MONEY MONEY MONEY!!!!!!
     
  18. yippeekyaa

    yippeekyaa Moved forward. VIP

    Reputations:
    547
    Joined:
    Feb 24, 2012
    Messages:
    6,488
    Likes Received:
    24
    Step 3. Black male him into having your entire "modeling" history in Europe removed from the internet in exchange for not mentioning his "hair system" or his ralphy relationships.
     
  19. JessOnCrack

    JessOnCrack Check out my maniacal laugh! Banned User

    Reputations:
    81,325
    Joined:
    Jan 14, 2013
    Messages:
    3,269
    Likes Received:
    6,841
    step 3: pretend all your life trying to be famous (son of the beach auditons, soap opera acting, modeling, small movie roles) really means you don't want to be famous
     
  20. Dlist

    Dlist Well-Known Member VIP

    Reputations:
    340,301
    Joined:
    Jan 16, 2012
    Messages:
    28,614
    Likes Received:
    37,744
    I love/hate when Beth said she was so happy that Howard finally 'discovered' her.:facepalm: