My Christmas Eve Prank

Discussion in 'The Bar' started by goldtopper, Dec 25, 2013.

  1. goldtopper

    goldtopper Well Known Heterosexual Gold

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    Last night we got together with all the family- about 15 in all. Great amounts of different food, liquor, beer, babies, etc.

    Every year, my wife brings "meat candy". It's little smoky sausages wrapped in bacon and topped with brown sugar. You line them up in the pan and bake them until the sugar melts and the bacon crisps. They're very good. When they come out of the oven, there is about 1/2" of grease left. When the grease cooled, my Sister in Law poured it into a green solo cup.

    Meanwhile, my uncle is hammered and yammering on about his favorite beers. He's quite the aficionado.

    I grabbed the green solo cup of grease and set it front of him. I told him it was a special Christmas stout that was smoked and made with maple. He eyed it up, raised the cup, inhaled deeply and expounded on the aroma of this "special beer".
    He took a huge pull on the cup and swallowed. He licked his lips and this look came over his face. He looks at me and says "I hope that wasn't expensive, that crap tasted like bacon grease!"
    The whole table erupted and he sat there and finally realized it was bacon grease. In spite of what he just drank, he gently swore vengeance. Everyone at the table was laughing so hard they were crying.
     
  2. Thelonious Davis

    Thelonious Davis Magical negro.

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    Who the fuck is THIS faggot?!?!!?
     
  3. nazdrowie

    nazdrowie Sultan of Sweat Gold

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    fuck outta here with your green solo cup
     
  4. Schmoopy

    Schmoopy Shit Mult Hunter Gold

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    [​IMG]
     
  5. wetback

    wetback #1 Asshole VIP

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    Who the fuck is this cocksucking faggit?
     
  6. Thelonious Davis

    Thelonious Davis Magical negro.

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    Magic bacon grease that stays liquid when cooled down
     
  7. Partyxanimal

    Partyxanimal Well-Known Member

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    Someone is going to have the shits.
     
  8. Phan Neepack

    Phan Neepack Well-Known Member

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    Did anyone poop their pants ?
     
  9. Ridic Too

    Ridic Too New Member Banned User

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  10. Nickthedick

    Nickthedick Absotutely

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    I thought it was a good prank. :dontknow:















































    and who the fuck is this faggot?
     
  11. Danas Boyfrien

    Danas Boyfrien Mediocre Negro Gold

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    If you were my nephew you would have gotten your ass beat.
     
  12. A Succulent Chinese Meal

    A Succulent Chinese Meal What is the charge?

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    "Different food, liquor, beer, babies?"
     
  13. Nickthedick

    Nickthedick Absotutely

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    :wtf: :jj:
     
  14. jdwhatever

    jdwhatever Fesh Gold

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    Lol.
     
  15. jdwhatever

    jdwhatever Fesh Gold

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    Pretty sure he didn't drink that grease hot. And if it cooled it would have went from liquid to congealed grease.
     
  16. Avery

    Avery Well-Known Member Banned User

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    jews eat christian babies on xmas eve and plot their continued world domination. :grad:

    a wrench of logic has been thrown into this supposed prank. :bigthink
     
  17. A Succulent Chinese Meal

    A Succulent Chinese Meal What is the charge?

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    This story hinges on the idea that the reader of it is retarded.
     
  18. Mack

    Mack Well-Known Member VIP

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    Liquified bacon grease would yield a trip to the burn unit and a feeding tube.
     
  19. stripes

    stripes Active Member Banned User

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    you would busboy:facepalm:
     
  20. Nickthedick

    Nickthedick Absotutely

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    :wtf:

    Edit: I see what you did there. :watchingyou: