They dropped me off in a suburban area with a clipboard and a map of where to go. I was nervous as fuck, my hands were sweaty, legs shaky (moms spaghetti). But seriously, my mind was being tortured by how nervous I was. I quickly started calling friends to talk to them and tell them how crazy it was that I was out on my own on just my second day on work. I had hoped to be able to shadow another salesperson again, but they said I was ready. My friends kept telling me to just suck it up and do it, although they said they understood it was really difficult. Finally, after seriously about an hour of walking around talking on the phone, I opened the front gate to my first house, walked up to the front door...and froze...for about 5 seconds, before I turned around and left. I wasn't ready. I called friends and burned off another hour, before I finally decided it was time. Next house...door bell rings. No one's home. "Fucking good" I thought as I was walking away. And then it happened. I found a house that looked nice, gripped onto my clipboard, and walked up to the front door before ringing the doorbell. Immediately I felt a wave of nervousness sweep over me, as if I were a passenger Shivvy's car as he wildly DUI'd down a busy highway. I noticed someone was approaching the door -- and it opened. I think the guy must have been in his...60's? He had a thicker head of hair than a Chriza or KOC, but it was greyish white, and you could tell he was old by his face. I started saying "Hey Im from blabla, you've probably heard of us?". "What? No" Oh fuck... "Oh, well you see we ..." And I froze. I started choking. Oh my god this is a nightmare, this can't be happening. 5 seconds have passed and I'm still choking. SAY SOMETHING ELSE. I choke on my next sentence too, the words are all escaping me. 100% honest, I felt like saying then and there "Ok actually nevermind, you're probably not interested". But I managed to stammer out a dumb sentence that I'm sure didn't make any sense. The guy looked confused, I asked him if he enjoyed making food, he said no, and then he said he wasn't interested. "I understand" I said as he was closing the door. After that I just gave up. I wandered around the neighborhood for 2 hours before texting my team leader and asking if I could shadow someone for the rest of the day. She texted me back saying that she was driving to my location, and that SHE would shadow me. When she arrived, I told her it hadn't gone so well, and asked if I could watch her do one first. The guy was super interested, and they started chatting about everything and anything. He was super interested in the product, and just as he was about to sign, his wife came out, so the girl had to spend another 20 minutes convincing the wife. When the deal was finally signed, our time was up, and it was time to pick everyone up and drive back. All in all...it was a horrible experience. But I know this is good for me. I need to keep pushing, and I'm going to spend the weekend working on my lines and trying to build up my confidence. On a side note, 70% of my coworkers are girls, and 2 of the girls in the car today were seriously 10/10s. I wish I had better news to come with, but Im all about keeping it real, garypagetwo style.