warning: boring I have been on a real self-improvement kick recently. Working hard at school and work. Working out consistently. Eating right. Staying social. Juss a real goo couple of weeks. So when I made plans to blaze up and get food, I felt it would be a nice reward for myself. Now at one time I was more than a casual weed smoker. I would prolly get high 3-4X a week, out of bewilderment, boredom and often times it seemed like the only fun thing to do. Though I had many great times smoking up, I gradually cut it down so now I smoke MAYBE once a month, probably less on average. Needless to say I usually get very high when I smoke. Such is the case of last night. The night started pretty normal, we were gonna smoke a blunt and get DQ. Unfortunately the store closed at 11, and by the time everyone was in the car and we were at DQ it was 10:45 and the weed was not even busted up yet. Normally anytime herb is involved it is a straight drive-thru, but 4 orders right before closing in a 100% chance of loogie. As everyone knows, it is ideal to eat right after smoking, and we had no plans to have a less than ideal night. This meant we would have to pre-roll, go in, get food, move the car (it was not in an ideal smoking area), smoke, and then eat. The most adept at rolling blunts was selected, to do just that. We still had some time before we absolutely had to go into the store, so we kept the roller company. I'm used to smoking pretty high end stuff, though with my tolerance at the moment, it really didn't matter what I inhaled as I was guaranteed to go to space. Upon seeing the weed that was brought to be smoked, it caused a commotion among others partaking. What was claimed to be "White Russian" looked like Brown Mexican. One of the people smoking joked/claimed it had no smell, and it was straight dirt weed. I took a whiff and couldn't detect anything but the faintest odor; my nose was a bit stuffed, though breathable, I wondered if i couldn't smell or the weed was truly stenchless. Nonetheless, the weed was busted and the blunt was in the process of rolling. It was at this point that me and the driver (who was not going to be smoking) exited the vehicle and went into DQ. The roller and a companion would stay in the car to finish the job and race the clock. The driver and I had been more of acquaintances, mostly friends-of-a-friend through the driver, but had recently been bonding more. It's weird/gay+faggot to say but I have definitely come to consider him as a friend. We are planning to go on a school trip later this school year too, so getting to know him would def be a goo thing. Plus he seems like a goo guy to have as a friend in general. Anyway so we get our food, and the other two clutchly come in at 10:59 and get their food too. We go back to the car, drive to the smoke spot and hit the blunt. We had to be quick becuase not only did we have food, we had Blizzards too, so it was important that we had hot food and cold ice cream. The weed turned out to be way better than expected, plus the blunt wrap was a nice tobacco fix (I don't smoke cigs). I felt quite lifted and euphoric when I got back into the vehicle. We move the car to a less conspicuous area and chill + eat for around 25 min. During this time, while still engaging in eating and conversation, I begin to think very deeply to myself, something I often do (and I assume many others do) while high. Thoughts about my life, life in general, the universe, society. The usual high things to think about. Not long after we finish eating, drop-offs begin to happen. Because of geographical reasons I am the second to be dropped off. Along the way my thoughts become more deeper, more meta and more in tune w/ reality. They all converge until I achieve a moment of self-actualization. The feeling was greater than an orgasm. For once it felt like I was 100% aware of the reality of everything, with no self-biases clouding my judgement. It was an incredibly personal and overpowering feeling that is truly indescribable. My words don't do it justice. Anyway so I'm still on another level high from this and join back in the conversation going on in the car. All of a sudden I feel a wetness in my b-hole area. Huh? That's strange. It's only a little and I'm almost home so I ignore it. I reposition myself and it disappears. The driver asks me to find something on the radio, so I fiddle around to something goo. Reclining back down in the seat I feel it. The wetness has gotten larger, and spread. Let me just go off on a little tangent here. My biggest fear has always been shitting myself in public. I have never experienced it but hearing that it has happened to more people than you think has me worried. I almost feel like I am due for it. It is srsly the scariest thing I can imagine. The first person to go is dropped off and we continue on our way to my place, about a 10-15 min drive. At this point I can feel the wetness spread and spread, as it goes approaches the back of my knees and creeps up my b-crack. I begin to think about what I ate that day. I had woken up pretty late, then gone to school without eating. A few snacks of Halloween candy was all I had before I did a nice workout at the gym. Finally around 8PM I had a TV dinner, out of laziness, desperation (wasn't much food in my house), and quickness. As you know, TV dinner food is highly processed. I also think back to the large Blizzard I finished not an hour before. I had had trouble digesting milk recently and was recently starting to wonder if I was developing lactose intolerance. As all of this is going through my head I can feel wetness spreading in my underpants. OK. I begin to think. I may have to come to terms with the fact that I have shit my pants in the front seat of a friends vehicle. My worst nightmare had been realized. I begin to wonder if the self-actualization is related to admitting I shit my pants, i.e. I realize everything there is to know about me, including the fact that I shit my pants. HOW TO DEAL? First of all, I stayed calm. The whole way home I was staying present in conversation, keeping my cool, and NOT freaking out. Second, I needed to assess the damage. Had I ruined my underwear? My pants? My friend's seat? My dignity? Would I be paying for upholstery of the seat? (100% chance of happening if any poo got on it). At this point I am 80% sure I lost control of my bowels as I self-actualized. I began to subtly sniff the air. My sense of smell had may have failed me once before tonight, so it can only be of use if it DOES smell something, it is not to be trusted if it DOESN'T smell something (only confirmatory tests held weight). After a few inhales, I can smell a slight dirt-like organic smell. I couldn't tell if it was the weed that was smoked almost 40 minutes prior, or the shit I am pretty sure filled my boxer-briefs. I looked over at the driver. He had his hand on his face, with his fingers around his mouth and nose. Not a good sign. At this point, in my head, I am panicked. This will be told for generations. I will forever be known as someone who shit their pants in someone's car. My friends will never let me live this down (though I don't blame them, srs that is vry funny). I may have to go through the awkward process of admitting I shit my pants, temporarily cleaning the seat, and then paying for new fabric (which I would gladly do, juss a huge pain, hassle embarrassment). We pull up to my house. I am in the shotgun seat, and my other friend is in the back seat. This means he will occupy my seat for the last leg of the drop-offs journey. I say my goodbyes and get up. No smell. I turn around and look at the seat. Not a spot. I walk towards my front door. No shit rolling down my leg. Once I get inside I head straight to the bathroom. The moment of truth. I pull down my pants and examine my underwear. Nothing. I felt around with my hand. A little damp, but no signs of poop. The ultimate test. I took a big whiff. Smelled fresh, no poo stench whatsoever. I have come to the conclusion of why I thought I shit my pants. My only explanation is the car had heated seats and I was ass-sweating a little bit from them (I usually ass sweat a lot when I do cardio). The extreme panic made me sweat more, in a horrible shit-fear feedback loop. Being high probably didn't help with the situation either. But I have taken away a few lessons from this. 1. Pants shitting can happen to anyone, anywhere at anytime. Always be mentally prepared to deal with an public pants pooing. 2. I am a lot better than I think I am at keeping my cool in pressure situations. 3. When you work hard, it pays off. Overall this was one of the most terrifying and awe-inspiring experiences in my life.