Stern Show Never Forget: Beth Stern Believes Yoda Was Sent to Her from Her Dead Dog Bianca

Discussion in 'The Howard Stern Show' started by Benjamen, Jun 7, 2016.

  1. Benjamen

    Benjamen Well-Known Member

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    Going through some of Beth's oldest Instagram posts (in honor of her upcoming 10,000th photo, scheduled for tomorrow) I found myself in a Beth/Yoda vortex. Beth took in foster Yoda just six weeks after she opened her Instagram account, and Yoda was an immediate success among her social media followers. That's why they were especially heartbroken when, on April 15, 2014, just 10 days after Beth introduced him to the world (without even a name at that point), Howard announced on his show that Beth was told that Yoda had a fatal heart condition, and could die at any time. As a result, Beth was going to keep him and comfort him until his certain death. She posted this photo that same morning:





    It was a grim announcement with few details, and Yoda fans everywhere were devastated. In the following months, Beth posted photo after photo of the dying-but-healthy-seeming Persian, which elicited sympathy and condolences from her most devoted, animal-loving followers. It's a terrible thing to lose a pet -- especially one that shows no signs of illness.

    Luckily for everyone, in September Beth told Howard that Yoda was deemed a "medical miracle" by three different vets, and his heart -- which, if he had been a human, would've been a candidate for a transplant, Beth said -- completely healed itself just in time for the release of the children's book that Beth and a real author had written about Yoda's unbelievable true story.

    [​IMG]


    This Instagram vortex led me to an early book promotion interview that Beth gave with friend of the Stern Show Marianne Garvey. In it, Beth confides two things that she never again shared in any of the subsequent TV or radio appearances she made to promote her book:

    1) When she first brought Yoda home and "needed to get in touch with his feelings," she turned to a "pet communicator" who told her that her sad, matted rescue was depressed.

    And: 2) The "pet communicator" also revealed to her that Yoda was a gift from the dearly departed Bianca.


    [​IMG]


    "Yoda is all white and has a smushed face like Bianca," says Beth, noting that Bianca died two years ago and Yoda is 2 years old. "It’s no coincidence."


    The headline for the piece -- as if anything Beth has said about Yoda's death or Bianca's gift from beyond the grave is true -- is "Undying Love." Beth appears next to it holding her miracle cat, dressed only in her bra and underwear.


    [​IMG]

    "Look at him as a ‘kiss from Bianca,'" Beth says about Yoda. Her book made the New York Times Bestseller's list.


    [​IMG]

    Now that we all know that Yoda's fatal heart condition was totally made up so that Beth could keep an expensive purebred cat that she believed to be a kind of reincarnated version of her expensive purebred dog, I actually feel sorry for the animal lovers Beth fooled into getting sad about Yoda's pending death. Not only did Beth play with their emotions by deceiving them, but she used the sentiment of their comments as the basis for her book.

    Here's video of Yoda licking the vet smell off a kitten who was just neutered (apparently typical behavior for male Persians, according to one commenter), posted to Beth's Instagram account just two months after Howard announced Yoda was about to die at any time. These poor people were genuinely concerned for the health of a cat who had nothing wrong with him, and projected all kinds of soulfulness and love onto his actions, all thanks to Beth deceiving them:




    joypop311Please keep babies around Yoda!!!! I think it helps his heart!!!!! <3

    kimrussgrayYoda's heart will be broken when those kittens leave......hurry and get more for him......

    jayha68He is so lovely, his heart is to big to last for too long. Glad you two are giving him the care and love he deserves.

    mblondie3Don't let them go, his heart will be broken...

    cheznethBless his heart you better have another set of foster kittens coming in or he will be so sad without kittens!

    zombieshawnYoda has such a huge heart. It's so sweet to see him care for these kittens like their his own. My heart melts when I watch these videos. ♡_♡

    trebordaddy55The only problem with #yoda 's heart is that it's too big.

    nbenko28Please don't ever take those kittens away from Yoda.. He will die of a broken heart #keepthem

    lukens1100Yoda is so wonderful!!! They can't do anything for his heart?? :(

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  2. face palm

    face palm Well-Known Member

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    you spent a lot of time on that post
     
  3. ApeFace

    ApeFace Well-Known Member

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    Vomit inducing.
     
  4. slab0meat

    slab0meat negative creep

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    She looks like the last shit I took

    She looks like the last shit I took




    (thanks as always, Benjamen)
     
  5. MrWarmth

    MrWarmth ADORABLE DEPLORABLE Gold

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    She's like a reincarnation of Tammy Faye Baker or something
     
  6. monsoon

    monsoon Who are you with?

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    Yoda'S sad heart didn't get monster von munchausen by proxy enough attention. And that cat is declawed from a breeder. It's moved on to poking kitns eyes out and cutting.
    The bulldog people told mooose to F off.

    F mutt
     
    SuperRebel, HTJ, TheHighHat and 13 others like this.
  7. Bye You!

    Bye You! The n word guy Gold

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    YES!
     
  8. Benjamen

    Benjamen Well-Known Member

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    I think that Beth became so intoxicated from the six months of condolences and praise she received after inventing Yoda's fatal heart condition, she became obsessed with finding more and more kittens that would also elicit that kind of response. The blind ones are perfect for her, because she can show physical proof that they're actually disabled, unlike with Yoda or her other "special needs" cats.
     
    Last edited: Jun 7, 2016
  9. Tim

    Tim ty dawg for gold! Gold

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    Lemme get in my bra and underpants to promote a children's book! Dumb cunt.
     
  10. tv910

    tv910 Well-Known Member

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    And before that Beth milked Bianca's death for every ounce of sympathy and attention she could get, including multiple photos of her "grieving" and posing with the urn containing Bianca's ashes.
     
  11. bobblebooey

    bobblebooey Well-Known Member VIP

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  12. Benjamen

    Benjamen Well-Known Member

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    Please don't tell me Beth was actually planning to kill Yoda for sympathy, but decided to spare his life when the book prospect came up.
     
  13. PSU Shower Room

    PSU Shower Room Well-Known Member

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    "Dinesh, you're assigned to the Stern Instagram Account today."

    "Alright, I've never worked that one before. What do I write?"

    "It's easy. Just pretend you're a mentally challenged 15 year old girl."

    "Got it, boss."
     
  14. beetlejosh

    beetlejosh I got a head that's large Gold

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    She believes in reincarnated animals, but this rainbow bridge
    "pome" her followers told her about is "ridiculous?"

    She's a confused asshole.

     
  15. Drungle

    Drungle VIP Extreme Gold

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    Maybe when Yoda dies, he'll send her a brain.
     
  16. Benjamen

    Benjamen Well-Known Member

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    I've never seen that sneering, flippant video before. I'm genuinely surprised that she would be so cavalier about something that her fellow pet lovers passed along to help her through her grieving. She doesn't show any compassion at all. "I hope you're not at the Rainbow Bridge, because you're miseraboe without me. If you are there, see you in 70 years!"

    And does this thing really qualify as a poem (or "pome")?

    [​IMG]
     
  17. codeine

    codeine Well-Known Member

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    I don't wish death upon anyone but I definitely would not feel bad if Beth died.
     
  18. codeine

    codeine Well-Known Member

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    Fucking Cunt.
     
  19. Benjamen

    Benjamen Well-Known Member

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    "And now kids, let's hear from a woman who claims her dead dog sent her a gift from the grave in the form of a dying cat. Everyone sit as close as you can to her."

    [​IMG]
     
  20. beetlejosh

    beetlejosh I got a head that's large Gold

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    Total shit stain!
    No redeeming qualities, whatsoever.