one time schmoopy told me what he thought was the best piece of fatherly advice he got

Discussion in 'The Bar' started by Harry Gibbs, Oct 28, 2015.

  1. Harry Gibbs

    Harry Gibbs the boss of all men

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    he said that his one eyed pappy told him "you'll never grow wise; you'll only grow older."

    i told him it wasnt that good of advice because his dad also forgot balder and fatter.
     
  2. MrPPV

    MrPPV The Shed Stopper

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    Sounds more like a diss than advice
     
  3. A Succulent Chinese Meal

    A Succulent Chinese Meal Oh, that's a nice headlock, sir. VIP

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    "Son, you are a rapidly aging idiot."
     
  4. Dirty South

    Dirty South Large Member

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    OEJP hates Schmurphy Brown.
     
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  5. beatlejaws

    beatlejaws nowhere poster

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    schmippy took it to heart
     
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  6. Harry Gibbs

    Harry Gibbs the boss of all men

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    i think it was advice in parable form. he was really telling him to keep his sites set low.
     
  7. redshirt

    redshirt Well-Known Member VIP

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    Son, you're never going to be the best...learn to settle.
     
  8. Mack

    Mack Well-Known Member

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    And you keep dropping teeth all over my floor.
     
  9. Anfkid

    Anfkid Blue Banner Mafia Staff Member

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    Shoulda told him to wash his ass.
     
  10. redshirt

    redshirt Well-Known Member VIP

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    Always think of this when I hear those words.
    [​IMG]
     
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  11. Anfkid

    Anfkid Blue Banner Mafia Staff Member

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    @Mack did you know Stoopy is eating the inhalers not stuffing em up his nose? :wtf:
     
  12. A Succulent Chinese Meal

    A Succulent Chinese Meal Oh, that's a nice headlock, sir. VIP

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    And then because the cotton constipates him, he digs out wads of partially digested food and cotton with his fingers. That's why his nails are always brown and black and long, so he can extract the cotton and feces.
     
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  13. Anfkid

    Anfkid Blue Banner Mafia Staff Member

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    Wait wait wait. They don't come out automatically?? He's gotta dig em out?? LMAO WHY IS HE ALIVE!!! I'd sooner kill myself than have that existence and I'm living off a machine!
     
  14. MrPPV

    MrPPV The Shed Stopper

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    No way mops took it that way. He probably has his dad's quote framed somewhere in his section 8 apartment
     
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  15. Mack

    Mack Well-Known Member

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    Oh yeah. He kept talking up this super powerful super secret drug he was doing bu was really vague about what it was. Once we drug it out of him we ridiculed him mercilessly about it.

    I believe he admitted to having to fish the cotton out of his rectum with his fingers because the active ingredient plugged him up. :rofl:
     
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  16. Schmoopy

    Schmoopy Shit Mult Hunter

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    Good god that sucked, faggit. Pwned!
     
  17. Schmoopy

    Schmoopy Shit Mult Hunter

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    The best advice my dad gave me was don't ever try to surpass my wealth because you won't.:jj:
     
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  18. Schmoopy

    Schmoopy Shit Mult Hunter

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    I'm not even kidding.
     
  19. Schmoopy

    Schmoopy Shit Mult Hunter

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    I've always been an excellent underachiever.
     
  20. Schmoopy

    Schmoopy Shit Mult Hunter

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    :fail:!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!:cwl: