Prisoner injects Vaseline into penis

Discussion in 'The Howard Stern Show' started by Shithead, Oct 29, 2015.

  1. Shithead

    Shithead Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    11,314
    Joined:
    Jan 16, 2012
    Messages:
    14,958
    Likes Received:
    25,954
    Stern related because he wanted to be beer-can thick but, you're in prison, why the need to be beer-can thick?:bigthink


    Prisoner injects his penis with Vaseline with predictably bad results
    By Yaron Steinbuch

    October 28, 2015 | 1:15pm

    Modal Trigger
    [​IMG]
    Alexandar Djelic
    What a nut job!

    A prisoner wanting a bigger manhood screwed up his “penal” system by injecting petroleum jelly into it, according to a report.

    Alexandar Djelic, 46, was serving seven years for theft in a Serbian slammer when a fellow inmate who claimed to be a plastic surgeon suggested the cringe-worthy procedure.

    “He told me I could inject my manhood with Vaseline and this would pump it up and make it much larger,” Djelic said.

    He arranged for medical equipment to be smuggled into the jail, and injected 80 grams of Vaseline into his member over a four-day span.

    “My genitals swelled up and I was in terrible pain,” said Djelic, who was taken to a hospital.

    “The swelling was so bad, the doctors had to cut away an outer part of my penis so I can urinate. I was put on a catheter, then got an infection, but survived the horror,” he said.

    He also paid a stiff penalty at home.

    “The wife left me because she could not see this horror, and no one can help me,” he lamented.
     
    bdbx18 and Joe Bauers like this.
  2. Abner Devereaux

    Abner Devereaux Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    0
    Joined:
    Aug 25, 2015
    Messages:
    2,302
    Likes Received:
    5,772
    guarantee he wouldn't be stupid enough to hang up welcome home balloons for a blind cat though...
     
  3. cetiya

    cetiya Lunatic Gold

    Reputations:
    27,461
    Joined:
    Feb 7, 2015
    Messages:
    5,080
    Likes Received:
    14,248
    :haha:. What a gullible dumbass.
     
  4. MISERABLE66

    MISERABLE66 Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    57
    Joined:
    Jan 20, 2012
    Messages:
    1,456
    Likes Received:
    826
    "Robin, Im coming in with the vazeleen"
     
  5. Joe Bauers

    Joe Bauers Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    1,257
    Joined:
    Feb 7, 2012
    Messages:
    31,570
    Likes Received:
    48,287
    A Stiff Penalty... :rs:
     
  6. HS Cult Leader

    HS Cult Leader Elite Member Gold

    Reputations:
    27,431
    Joined:
    Jun 2, 2012
    Messages:
    14,751
    Likes Received:
    22,238
    Maybe his cellmate was this freak that faked being a doctor and injected cement into it's and other peoples asses??


    [​IMG]


    [​IMG]
     
    IfTheyOnlyKnew likes this.
  7. Bye You!

    Bye You! The n word guy Gold

    Reputations:
    12
    Joined:
    Sep 3, 2010
    Messages:
    79,569
    Likes Received:
    41,549
    The amazing stupidity of that gets greater over time.
     
  8. bdbx18

    bdbx18 Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    312
    Joined:
    Sep 21, 2015
    Messages:
    1,209
    Likes Received:
    1,373
    Stoopid because he should have told the doc to go first.
     
  9. sz1122

    sz1122 Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    0
    Joined:
    Apr 27, 2015
    Messages:
    265
    Likes Received:
    796
    Is it really that bad an idea. Think about it. I bigger johnson and always lubed and ready. Guys ahead of his time
     
    Dorb and Mike Huntslooce like this.
  10. Abner Devereaux

    Abner Devereaux Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    0
    Joined:
    Aug 25, 2015
    Messages:
    2,302
    Likes Received:
    5,772
  11. Craignor

    Craignor Bodymore, Murderland VIP

    Reputations:
    3,146
    Joined:
    Jul 8, 2013
    Messages:
    2,041
    Likes Received:
    3,499
    Smart guy, self lubricating!

     
  12. FishySausage

    FishySausage Original Nuttah VIP Gold

    Reputations:
    27,109
    Joined:
    Aug 25, 2010
    Messages:
    15,936
    Likes Received:
    28,030
    I'm gonna go ahead and call bullshit on this story.
    1) Serbia
    2) EIGHTY GRAMS of Vaseline???
    You wouldn't realize something was wrong after 1 or 2 grams? (For those of you who aren't European or have never bought drugs, that's like 3 pounds of Vaseline)
     
  13. goldtopper

    goldtopper Well Known Heterosexual Gold

    Reputations:
    83,084
    Joined:
    May 31, 2013
    Messages:
    21,045
    Likes Received:
    57,683
    I'm American and know 80 grams is just under 3 ounces.
     
    moosetracks and FishySausage like this.
  14. joemama

    joemama Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    5,351
    Joined:
    Jan 16, 2014
    Messages:
    3,890
    Likes Received:
    10,681
    [​IMG]
     
  15. killallposers

    killallposers VIP Extreme Gold

    Reputations:
    7,371
    Joined:
    Aug 27, 2012
    Messages:
    14,778
    Likes Received:
    24,146
    So the wife didn't leave him while he was serving 7 years in prison. She left him because his dick looks fucked up. Women.
     
  16. FishySausage

    FishySausage Original Nuttah VIP Gold

    Reputations:
    27,109
    Joined:
    Aug 25, 2010
    Messages:
    15,936
    Likes Received:
    28,030
    Holy crap. :facepalm: I'm a jackass.
    Please disregard my bonehead post
     
  17. goldtopper

    goldtopper Well Known Heterosexual Gold

    Reputations:
    83,084
    Joined:
    May 31, 2013
    Messages:
    21,045
    Likes Received:
    57,683
    Hey, c'mon. If that's the worst thing you've done today you've had a good day!
     
    FishySausage likes this.
  18. ChimneySweep

    ChimneySweep Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    3
    Joined:
    Jan 15, 2014
    Messages:
    6,912
    Likes Received:
    9,980
    In prison? yes. it is a very bad idea.
     
  19. FishySausage

    FishySausage Original Nuttah VIP Gold

    Reputations:
    27,109
    Joined:
    Aug 25, 2010
    Messages:
    15,936
    Likes Received:
    28,030
    Even 3 OUNCES seems like a lot of anything to inject into your hog.
     
    goldtopper likes this.
  20. SorryBoff

    SorryBoff Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    37,892
    Joined:
    Nov 21, 2012
    Messages:
    13,088
    Likes Received:
    18,935
    This other prisoner didn't completely lie to him, he said it would make it bigger and it was, right up until it got infected and they had to start lopping off parts of it.

    BTW, his wife is Serbian, I'm pretty sure she's got her own "horror" down there as well.