WTF Pro-tip: How to avoid jury duty

Discussion in 'The Howard Stern Show' started by Mlaw, Aug 26, 2016.

  1. Mlaw

    Mlaw Quite Contrarian VIP Gold

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    Of course every state/county may be different, but I've found this to be foolproof so long as you are allowed to defer your service and pick your date.

    When you get your notice, request that you service be deferred, and choose a date between the last two weeks of August through Labor Day. This is the time courts are the least busy. Judges and attorneys traditionally take vacations this time of year, and chances are you won't even have to show up. Again, so long as your area has the system where you call the day before to see if your jury pool is needed.

    The other reason deferring your service tends to get you out of needing to appear, is your jury number will be higher, since those who were assigned the dates will have the lower numbers. I've been doing this every time I've been called for jury duty for as long as I can remember, and it has never failed

    :hat:

    [​IMG]
     
  2. DrivenByDemons

    DrivenByDemons Spinoff Jesus Staff Member

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    I like jury duty :dontknow:
     
  3. Gitfiddle

    Gitfiddle Live Deliciously

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    Or shit your pants during jury selection.
     
  4. freds

    freds . VIP

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    sweet. thanks, Law.


    but should you of all people be helping us avoid our civic duty?
     
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  5. freds

    freds . VIP

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    i want Gitfiddle and all his cousins to take this advice.
     
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  6. dawg

    dawg In The Dog House Staff Member

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    I want you to go to jail for this.
     
  7. Coke Can Baby

    Coke Can Baby Don't be a skunk

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    I find showing up in my nazi uniform has the same effect
     
  8. Danas Boyfrien

    Danas Boyfrien Mediocre Negro Gold

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    Take legal advice from Mlaw at your own peril. It would be a shame for you to do 15 to 20 for trying to avoid jury duty.
     
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  9. DogStar69

    DogStar69 Well-Known Member

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    If you legally change your name to Nazi Hitler you should get out of jury duty easily.

    Have your friends call you Naz which sounds cool.
     
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  10. freds

    freds . VIP

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    Johnny Cochran should have done 15-20 for jury selection.


    nvm, he's dead.
     
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  11. freds

    freds . VIP

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    hey dogstar, read all eight posts no matter how unfunny.
     
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  12. SternsEgo

    SternsEgo Well-Known Member

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    Dont shower for a week, don't shave, wear old clothes.
     
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  13. DrivenByDemons

    DrivenByDemons Spinoff Jesus Staff Member

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    I like to judge people :jj:
     
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  14. DaTenses

    DaTenses Well-Known Member

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    Basically, go looking like Artie
     
  15. yosemite sam

    yosemite sam Camel Jockey

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    I actually wanted to go, I filled mine out and I just got a 'thank you play again' a couple of weeks later saying they already had enough jurors :bigcry:
     
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  16. regult

    regult 4 Goals...

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    Been called a handful of times. As soon as they find out that I come from an LEO family (cousin is the county sheriff) and volunteer my services to the PD, I'm cut free. Never been called for a civil trial, though.

    Our county doesn't follow up on notices, either, so you could just never show up and they wouldn't pursue it. Plenty of retired folk chomping at the bit to do something with their day, so the pool is never shallow.
     
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  17. YinzerMasshole

    YinzerMasshole VIP Extreme Gold

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    They will Nazi that coming!
     
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  18. Tranquil

    Tranquil Decent! VIP

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    Or just throw it away, when you get it in the mail.
     
  19. zutroy

    zutroy Totally nude. Totally flawless.

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  20. freds

    freds . VIP

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    jesus christ.
     
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