Pussy eating app

Discussion in 'The Howard Stern Show' started by Morrisb, Mar 9, 2014.

  1. Morrisb

    Morrisb Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    15
    Joined:
    Feb 25, 2012
    Messages:
    4,069
    Likes Received:
    433
    http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/...one_n_4919317.html?ncid=fcbklnkushpmg00000063

    When it comes to oral sex, maybe it's time to start phoning it in.

    Lick This, a new App by San Francisco-based team "Club Sexy Time," promises to let users hone their cunnilingus skills by licking their smartphones, according to Fast Company.

    The app requires no download; you just go to lickthisapp.com on your mobile browser and start tonguing away at your phone screen. The site suggests that you "wrap it up" by putting some plastic wrap over the screen.

    This is presumably because your cell phone is dirtier than a toilet seat.

    Once you've fashioned your makeshift dental dam, it's time to get licking. At this time, there are three exercises available for budding cunning linguists.

    • "Up n' Down," which challenges users to flick a light switch up and down as quickly as possible.
    • "Circles," which has users move the handle of a mechanical pencil sharpener around as quickly as possible.
    • "Freestyle," which asks users to use their tongue as an implement to jab at a beach ball bouncing seemingly at random around the screen.
    :lol:
     
  2. datchguy

    datchguy New Member Banned User

    Reputations:
    0
    Joined:
    Oct 14, 2012
    Messages:
    13,446
    Likes Received:
    8
    At least the app doesn't have that faint hint of urine. :coffee:
     
  3. greyt

    greyt Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    0
    Joined:
    Nov 22, 2012
    Messages:
    3,052
    Likes Received:
    2,577
    at least you can't get throat cancer from your iphone
     
  4. Butcher

    Butcher ?

    Reputations:
    8
    Joined:
    Sep 5, 2010
    Messages:
    40,120
    Likes Received:
    3,383
    Is there one set of lips or two, Robin?
     
  5. RumBalls

    RumBalls The original RumBalls, est. Jan 16, 2012

    Reputations:
    0
    Joined:
    Jan 16, 2012
    Messages:
    2,622
    Likes Received:
    2,086
    -1 for the app
     
  6. Nemo

    Nemo Beer Can Thick Gold

    Reputations:
    12
    Joined:
    Sep 7, 2010
    Messages:
    94,548
    Likes Received:
    48,665
  7. AllAboutHim Ed

    AllAboutHim Ed #mypurpose VIP

    Reputations:
    17,721
    Joined:
    Jan 1, 2014
    Messages:
    7,773
    Likes Received:
    11,988
    Fucking yuck. I think you should try upgrading the caliber of women you're with.
     
  8. John Smith

    John Smith Well-Known Member VIP

    Reputations:
    6,551
    Joined:
    Jul 8, 2012
    Messages:
    3,760
    Likes Received:
    4,738
    Before there were apps, Kinison already had the answer: paint the alphabet!
     
  9. Spazzmatazz

    Spazzmatazz Band Member Banned User

    Reputations:
    0
    Joined:
    Aug 20, 2010
    Messages:
    43,046
    Likes Received:
    843
    I think my phone has the herps...
     
  10. HowieStearn

    HowieStearn HateClub

    Reputations:
    14,143
    Joined:
    Dec 13, 2011
    Messages:
    17,903
    Likes Received:
    19,190
    yeah, my chicks dont piss- or shit.



    ...I do have to blow them up though :dontknow:
     
  11. NyMarkNy

    NyMarkNy Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    7,574
    Joined:
    Nov 7, 2012
    Messages:
    5,823
    Likes Received:
    14,140
    Alphabet thing is bs. Women can't get off if your tongue is going in a million different directions, they need something sustained, consistent, and focused on the clit to reach orgasm but only at the very end. Start that part too soon and they will get too sensitive.
     
  12. Brokenbad

    Brokenbad Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    8,746
    Joined:
    Apr 23, 2012
    Messages:
    6,207
    Likes Received:
    6,555
    Howard can't wait for the How To Suck Dick And Control The Gag Reflex App
     
  13. HowieStearn

    HowieStearn HateClub

    Reputations:
    14,143
    Joined:
    Dec 13, 2011
    Messages:
    17,903
    Likes Received:
    19,190
    fuck them. were sposed to take courses on figuring out their shit and gettin them off? they're not the least bit concerned about sucking at blowjobs, or not blowing at all :what:
     
  14. Dreamking

    Dreamking The dogs of doom are howlin' low...

    Reputations:
    0
    Joined:
    Sep 3, 2013
    Messages:
    2,696
    Likes Received:
    2,523
    :winner:

    Start like a kitten lapping up milk. Gentle and average speed. Increase everything slowly and build.

    And if you get confused, just ask her...
     
  15. illini fan

    illini fan New Member VIP

    Reputations:
    3
    Joined:
    Jan 16, 2012
    Messages:
    4,900
    Likes Received:
    13
    ummm... he's waiting for the sucking cock app...
     
  16. illini fan

    illini fan New Member VIP

    Reputations:
    3
    Joined:
    Jan 16, 2012
    Messages:
    4,900
    Likes Received:
    13

    I always thought you could get an STD from your phone....
     
  17. newcastlefan

    newcastlefan גֵּרְשֹׁם VIP

    Reputations:
    41,522
    Joined:
    Dec 31, 2011
    Messages:
    71,408
    Likes Received:
    29,531
    so this is probably only available for Droid and Windows phones, because there is no sex at Apple?
     
  18. EndOfLine

    EndOfLine PLATINUM SPONSOR VIP

    Reputations:
    18,185
    Joined:
    Sep 28, 2010
    Messages:
    9,743
    Likes Received:
    15,789
    It's not an app - it's a website - it's right up there in the story. :hat:
     
  19. NiggalissCage

    NiggalissCage Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    0
    Joined:
    Dec 29, 2011
    Messages:
    2,610
    Likes Received:
    3,625
    Or toilet paper dingleberries, I've tangled with them before.
     
  20. EndOfLine

    EndOfLine PLATINUM SPONSOR VIP

    Reputations:
    18,185
    Joined:
    Sep 28, 2010
    Messages:
    9,743
    Likes Received:
    15,789
    :mami: