Quick Masturbation Idea

Discussion in 'The Bar' started by Scott, Oct 29, 2015.

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  1. Scott

    Scott Masshole Staff Member

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    I only have 4 minutes, and I'm blind. Go.
     
    Oct 29, 2015 #1
  2. Lou Loomis

    Lou Loomis Feel the Gern

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    type your city into Google followed by "boudoir photographers"

    Go straight to the Blog section of the hottest looking site you see under the Google Images tab, not the photo gallery of the site. You want the full sets of chicks' photo sessions

    If fate smiles on you, you might see someone you know... or the specialladyfriend of someone you know in their underwears

    :hat:
     
    Last edited: Oct 29, 2015
    Oct 29, 2015 #2
    !!!kaboom!!!, MorningSong13, Shivvy and 4 others like this.
  3. crackerjackson5

    crackerjackson5 Well-Known Member

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    Fucking genious. I'll do this when I get home.
     
    Oct 29, 2015 #3
  4. Mr Sinister

    Mr Sinister ☠ Gold

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    Warm up a wet leather glove
     
    Oct 29, 2015 #4
  5. GLguygardner

    GLguygardner "I break bread, ribs, hundred dollar bills..." Gold

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    Sit on your hand till until it goes numb. Old tried and true method.
     
    Oct 29, 2015 #5
  6. crackerjackson5

    crackerjackson5 Well-Known Member

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    Take a banana, cut it in half, wrap half with tape to hold it together. Squeeze the banana and use the skin as a homemade fleshlight.

    Pro tip: you could probably heat the banana up for a more personal touch.
     
    Oct 29, 2015 #6
    WillyBest likes this.
  7. DarkFriday

    DarkFriday Fired as a MOD...Twice. Gold

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    :echick:
     
    Oct 29, 2015 #7
    IfTheyOnlyKnew likes this.
  8. DarkFriday

    DarkFriday Fired as a MOD...Twice. Gold

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    jessica-simpson-pink-bikini-cabo-animated.gif
     
    Oct 29, 2015 #8
    Shivvy and Ridic like this.
  9. P-B

    P-B Honourary Canuck Gold

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    :coffee:

     
    Oct 29, 2015 #9
    IfTheyOnlyKnew and XuXu like this.
  10. Lou Loomis

    Lou Loomis Feel the Gern

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    I'm Old School, Janice!!!!
     
    Oct 29, 2015 #10
  11. crackerjackson5

    crackerjackson5 Well-Known Member

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    This one's known as the stranger.
     
    Oct 29, 2015 #11
  12. maroon

    maroon Well-Known Member Banned User

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    too late
    :owned::dance::sd:
    [​IMG]
    [​IMG]
    [​IMG]
    back boobs are actually a good idea ladies...take note
     
    Oct 29, 2015 #12
    crazypreacher likes this.
  13. DiamondGoddess

    DiamondGoddess Born Ready for My Close-Up! Gold

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    Butter your hand.
     
    Oct 29, 2015 #13
    Pill Queen likes this.
  14. VAsiCkBoy

    VAsiCkBoy Well-Known Member

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    Aunt Betty????

    [​IMG]
     
    Oct 29, 2015 #14
    IfTheyOnlyKnew likes this.
  15. Bubbleguts420

    Bubbleguts420 2 word review, shit sandwich

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    Warm shaving cream
     
    Oct 29, 2015 #15
  16. Gomez

    Gomez Well-Known Member

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    would smash :grad:
     
    Oct 29, 2015 #16
    Shivvy likes this.
  17. FatKidSullivan

    FatKidSullivan Smoking Cigars

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    I live in a town of ugly women.

    Awesome idea though.
     
    Oct 29, 2015 #17
  18. Lou Loomis

    Lou Loomis Feel the Gern

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    You have to power past the fatties and the oldsters and the prudes who just pose in football jerseys
     
    Oct 29, 2015 #18
  19. Lou Loomis

    Lou Loomis Feel the Gern

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    Pick towns where you know the chicks are hot
     
    Oct 29, 2015 #19
    FatKidSullivan likes this.
  20. Rod-Stroker

    Rod-Stroker FUCK YOU, CANCER Gold

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    Piped ream

     
    Oct 29, 2015 #20
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