Roommate madness

Discussion in 'The Howard Stern Show' started by Beth Stern, Dec 3, 2014.

  1. Beth Stern

    Beth Stern Well-Known Member

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    OK, so I'm curious (which is code for obsessing). This former friend who is renting a room in my home. Answer me this:

    1. Why don't I hear him pee like a normal man? His bathroom backs up to my bedroom, I hear it all. When my son pee's standing up it sounds like a tidal wave. This guy, nada. I hear nothing. Is he sitting while peeing? Now that I think of it, the seat is always down. Why does a man sit to tinkle?

    2. Milk. He drinks, not kidding, 4-5 gallons of milk per week. There are always 2 gallons in the fridge at a time. I am dairy free so I don't drink a drop. Drinks only at night, says it helps him sleep. At times, I hear him get up in the middle of the night, walk to the kitchen, open/close fridge. I've read that the casomorphin in milk is addictive.

    Ok, ponder on good people.
     
  2. idiotbox

    idiotbox Looking for a dime and found a quarter. VIP

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    he's going to kill you in your sleep.
     
  3. smichal

    smichal A1 Dick Game

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    he stores his urine in jars under the bed or "the way of the road" [​IMG]
     
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  4. GLguygardner

    GLguygardner "I break bread, ribs, hundred dollar bills..."

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    Nevermind that....is that you???:bhump:
     
  5. HowieStearn

    HowieStearn HateClub

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    so, he hasnt tried to bang you
     
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  6. Night Ape

    Night Ape Well-Known Member

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    He might be a sink-peer. Most great men are.

    As for the milk, he probably just wants strong and healthy bones. And likes big tits.
     
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  7. Just Me

    Just Me Well-Known Member

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    Sounds like he's sitting to piss, but that still makes noise too. He could also be just aiming at the bowl and avoiding the water, but you said the seat is always down. When you're exhausted, like if you get up in the middle of your sleep, it's just much easier to sit and piss then it is to stand.
    Either way, what's the difference how he urinates?
    I have no clue about the milk... it sounds gross though, like he probably has a constant mucous mouth and sounds like HPE.
     
  8. kippy

    kippy Not Safe For Women VIP

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    Is this the guy who's fish you killed?

    He probably pees in the sink.
     
  9. Beth Stern

    Beth Stern Well-Known Member

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    Great. How, by sitting on me and peeing in my ear? :eek:
     
  10. Beth Stern

    Beth Stern Well-Known Member

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    I DIDN'T KILL IT. But yes, same guy.

    Sink peeing? Ewwww, maybe that's why his teeth are gray?:mad:
     
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  11. kippy

    kippy Not Safe For Women VIP

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    Ninjed
     
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  12. HowieStearn

    HowieStearn HateClub

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    I'm a great man
     
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  13. SomerSky

    SomerSky Obsessed with what I hate Banned User

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    He pees in the fish tank......
     
  14. Beth Stern

    Beth Stern Well-Known Member

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    He's tried for months. After 3 dates I called it quits in April. He has no back bone and is a lap dog. He'd give me anything I wanted. Except a strong, confident man who could balance being a leader and occasionally, letting me spank his heinie.
     
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  15. GLguygardner

    GLguygardner "I break bread, ribs, hundred dollar bills..."

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    Kinky;)
     
  16. HowieStearn

    HowieStearn HateClub

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    the bone's up front. prob solved
     
  17. Splash

    Splash Huge Member VIP

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    1. when its late and quiet I aim my stream for the part of the toilet above the water to keep down the noise. Seems like a considerate fellow

    And

    B. Milk is a great natural source of protein. Great for people that lift weights.


    Sounds like a good guy. You should bang him.
     
  18. SomerSky

    SomerSky Obsessed with what I hate Banned User

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    Seriously who the fuck pees in the sink?? Never heard that before, and why would you when you have a toilet???
    You boys never cease to amaze and confound!!
     
  19. Beth Stern

    Beth Stern Well-Known Member

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    If he pee'd in the tank, then HE killed the fish. I think tomorrow I will text him at work and ask if he pees sitting down or standing up. Though we don't speak other than hello here at the house, I know he will answer me with the truth. He's kinda Forest Gumpish that way.
     
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  20. meanredhed

    meanredhed VIP Extreme Gold

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    Maybe he's aware that you can hear him in the bathroom and he's a bit self conscious? He's probably polite because he puts the seat down. I have 3 sons and they all put the seat down out of common courtesy even though their darling father says I'm out numbered and I should leave the seat up....
     
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